My postpartum experience so far.
Them:"Hey! good to see you're seemingly coping well with having a new small person in your life, and whilst we understand that all babies develop at their own rate, and that's completely ok, we're sort of concerned your baby isn't clearly demonstrating to us these skills as well as we think they should be displaying.
So here are a selection of patronising leaflets to correct your bad parenting, I'll send you some websites that show you how to be a better parent.
I'll send you another link on the benefits of breastfeeding, even though you've said you can't breastfeed your child and haven't been breastfeeding and you weren't able to breastfeed the first one, we'll send it just in case you missed all the benefits we told you about for breastfeeding, because breast is best! even though it's absolutely the mother's choice whether she breastfeeds or not, statistically it's only terrible mothers who don't or can't, it's basically as bad as not vaccinating your baby, so we'll still send it to you.
I'll book you in another appointment with a different condescending health professional for three weeks time, who will just repeat everything I've already said and maybe raise some more concerns they feel that are as a result of your substandard parenting.
Everything ok? Any concerns? Any more problems you're experiencing that we'll need to correct for you?"
Me: "I cannot remember the last time I showered, I am bombarded with impossible standards of modern parenting people expect me to achieve everywhere I go, from media to family. I'm drowning. I have lost who I was and who I am, and whilst everyone sympathizes with my experience, they'd prefer me to maybe just keep it to myself and get on with it, and especially not have an episode when I'm at a social event. And make more of an effort with my appearance. And my husband wants to know when we can go back to doing normal sex things, even though I feel like my body has exploded from the inside out, I have no self confidence, and I live with a constant level of exhaustion that feels like an on going panic attack.
Them: '....yes it can be difficult.... Well! Here's a prescription for some paracetamol, and make sure you're drinking plenty of water!