brooklyn 99 is paw patrol for adults

We need to stop letting people who dont like body hair speak. About anything.

we should start giving testosterone to ants

uncles

is the world really such a terrible place? yesterday i asked if oat milk was extra and the barista said yes so i said ok just regular milk then and when she gave me my chai latte she whispered “i gave you oat milk ;)” doesnt that make u want to live another day?

bill gates is directly responsible for the delta variant lol

by preventing non western countries from producing generic versions of the covid vaccine and instead forcing these countries to fight over a limited amount of doses he allowed a large outbreak of the disease in india which mutated the virus to be especially virulent. its literally the gates variant.

of course bill gates wasnt the sole decision maker behind the vaccine patents, but hes the most visible and the most vocal. there were a lot of parts in the scheme but ultimately the decision to keep other countries from producing a generic vaccine was a deliberate choice to maintain a pharmaceutical monopoly which has had incredibly harmful ramifications

anyway! the banana bread vendor at the farmers market is called "better than sex" but this year they changed it to "almost better than sex" which means the bread is just worse this year or girlie got some good dick since last summer

every august its like. u will feel happy but also unbearably sad

life is good again (ordered something online)

i often wonder how many ppl from 2012 tumblr are still active on here

are u also still here, lurking in the shadows????

when i travel i like to take hilariously bad pictures of common tourist things, because anyone can take a nice picture of them, so i’d rather take a shitty one i can laugh at later 

here’s this

continuing:

Can I play, too?

I’m howling

this explains the tourists i saw taking a picture of a picture of edinburgh castle outside tesco instead of idk going to edinburgh castle 10 minutes away

This belongs here:

everyone please look at all the images in the replies of this post im dying i had no idea other people were as dumb as me

A rat eating from a trash can with the eiffel tower in the background

ok this one wins

is that Remy of fucking ratatouille

One moment you’re 17 and daydreaming about how glamorous your life will be when you’re finally an adult, then all of sudden it’s a decade later and “treating yourself” means buying full price pistacchios and taking a bath on a week night.

amazing