thats a cool skeleton fresh from skeleton hell

I SCROLLED THROUGH MY LIKES FOR AN HOUR TO FIND THIS

I am above the law

Gracious heavenly Father. As you recall, for some time now, I’ve sent you repeated prayers in the hopes that you’d make me good-looking when I grow up. Well I’m turning 16 on Saturday and I now know that was a childish flight of fancy and not a proper prayer and I apologize. It seems to me that my destiny is to be the Bride of Adventure. I expect you approve because you’ve sent me on so many now that I’ve quite developed a taste for them.

They hate to see a chad thriving

- Tsar Nicholas II before his execution

If I were jfk I would have simply eaten the bullet

honestly imagine being mary shelley. its the fucking early 1800s. we’re barely out of the era when people thought women reading novels would lead to like debauchery and premarital sex. the weather is just fucking bonkers in yonkers. everybodys clothes looked like they oughta weigh two hundred pounds. everyones goth but goth isnt a thing yet so they dont even know it. your kids are dying. your husbands dead. your friends are all probably doing coke. your doctor is also both doing and maybe prescribing coke. no electricity. people are out there just staring into the void and having clandestine affairs in graveyards or some shit just because theres nothing else to do. and whats that? youve just written frankenstein. girl what the fuck even–

Hozier is 6'5" you’re gonna have to open it a bit more

don’t go for realism in your art if it frustrates you, get weird, get blocky, get wiggly, just try and draw what makes you happy, not something that meets a standard

some woman on the street below just hit an operatic high c and then screamed “i’ll fucking kick your ass”

That was the wardrobe from Beauty and the Beast

hey syd-the-avenger, this post has over 50 thousand notes. people have added on that the woman on the street below was brendon urie, christine daae, kristin chenoweth, roger taylor, starkid, “literally me”, and “literally you”. and this is the only valid addition. 

ever notice how men criticize games like animal crossing and stardew valley on the basis of “the entire game is just doing tasks” without recognizing that “kill bad guy” is also just a task but violent?

”it’s so boring all you do is talk to people and do tasks so you can buy new things” yeah and all you do is press a bunch of buttons to kill people so you can buy new things? perish

my activity page has not known peace since i made this post i have hundreds of insufferable gamers crawling up my pant legs now but luckily i have a secret up my sleeve… i too am a gamer man. im immune to the gamer venom   

This has the same energy as that post that’s “Red Dead Redemption is just Barbie’s Horse Adventure with violence”.

This is it. This is the entire pet care experience in one video

DENNIS NOT THE LIGHT

NONONONO

DENNIS NO DON’T GET BURNED OH GOD OH FUCK

“Did you notice that in Thor 2, Thor kills a Kronan? And he meets Korg in the third one?”

bimbo? ain’t that the dude from lord of the rings

my sense of humor: getting birthday cards with the wildly incorrect age on it for people

I see this and raise you: getting cards for a wildly different occasion and customizing them to fit the holiday you need

anyway

Owner fell asleep with her phone in her hand and the lights on again.