so im trying to decipher this chart on wikipedia that has common vampire weaknesses in it and

a ‘green/yes’ is a weakness, a ‘red/no’ is something that isnt a weakness, and a ‘?’ is something that has never been addressed but fucking riddle me this

in what lore are vampires weak to getting soggy in milk

i scrolled over to check to see what this could possibly be and

places a hand on me cheek

happy halloween month time for my favourite post of all time

not to be controversial but absolutely disgusting that it’s sunday night 

those snakes are not fighting they are fucking. im very sorry

while two snakes FUCK to the death

That dog looking at the snakes like why you gotta do that while I’m eating

Metal as snakes fucking.

I’m at a wealthy middle-aged christmas party with my best friend a woman came up to me and said “you have to try the gouda” and I said “is it firm?” and she said “yes I wouldn’t have anything less” and we both threw our heads back and laughed and I’m still not sure why

wheres that pic from parks and rec. you all know the one

gasolina, the original despacito,

you all know im right. you all know its fucking true.

despacito WISHES it had half the raw energy of gasolina

You know those movies about those little nerd boys who get with really hot girls, and those girls eventually learn to settle for a little nerd boy because he’s kinda nice sometimes? Propaganda.

You know those movies and shows where the little nerd girl has to change absolutely every aspect that makes her, her, starting by her appearance, so she can get the really hot boy, while when it’s the other way around the girl just settles with the nerd boy? Propaganda.

I can’t stop thinking about kissing you btw

mama

just killed a man

put a gun against his head

pulled my trigger now he’s dead

and mama

life had just begun

but now i’ve gone and thrown it all away

AND MAMA

This shows humor is criminally underrated

this whole thing is way too good to be giffed you need to expirience it 

You have the power to heal others. You are a villain.

I am the American healthcare system

Omg

In 300 years someone’s gonna make a Hamilton-esque musical with Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders and teenagers on the internet are gonna stan Donald Trump like “uwu my trash son Donald being a drama queen as usual” and I’m gonna have to do it. I’m gonna have to come back from the dead and destroy the planet.

why is every song from phineas and ferb a banger.. how is that possible

is this site populated by 10 year olds

Have you ever heard a Phineas and Ferb song

Reblog to have something good happen at 1:42 tomorrow

reblog party pikachu on this monday night and you will find unexpected joy

this is how my voice sounds in my head

I think about this everyday

MEEEEAHHHHH

i’m so sick of news articles that look like this 

it builds itself up like OKAY WE FOUND THESE DEVASTATING RESULTS

and then you go in to look and you find it had a sample size of 40 

and then you’re like okay, what was the fantastic difference between these 40 people when sleeping with and without a dog

and the article is like

…so you get through it and you’re like you’re trying to tell me you think this is substantial in any capacity, this 40 sample size 3% difference ass bullshit??????????? you fucking shitforbrick bad at math fake ass science losers?