Lately all I ever do is mess around

brutalist candy cane

i don't know man, i just wish that we could [suddenly realising i'm coming dangerously close to expressing a real and earnest thought instead of filtering everything through several layers of intangible running bits] blow up the entire world. or something.

my name's cougar but my friends call me mountain lion and my mama calls me puma and today's my first day at big cat high. i'm so nervous i hope they don't realize i'm not panthera >ܫ<

emo cheetah jughead smoking behind the school: it's hopeless, catamount. they'll never see us as 'real' big cats... us outcats gotta stick together -ﻌ•

not pictured is the goth clouded leopard girl who bought the cigarettes w her fake id

When I'm a pastor and I open my eyes and the rapture happened when I was giving my sermon

me as a child: this "$4.99" sales stuff is idiotic, anyone can instantly round this up to $5 in their mind, no one is falling for this

me as an adult: oh wow only $4 (with some additional numbers behind it), that's great because if it was a single dollar more that would have been the last straw for me in my miserable life

every sunday i tell my liberal father that i'm off to go get another sex change. he tells me "yass monarch slay". but in reality i go to church to study the teachings of the lord. if my liberal father knew this i would be disowned. this is joe biden's america

cuz everytime we touch i get this feeling

and everytime we kiss i swear i could fly

I must not explain the joke. Explaining the joke is the joke-killer. I will face my followers who did not get the joke. I will permit them to pass over me and through me

you are making this so difficult

OP also turned off reblogs for this but it has to be said

me joining a discord server- "hello!"

guy named floyd- "hi! would you like a colour role?"

me- "what does that mean?"

floyd- "it means your name gets to be a colour. like how mine is pink for example"

me- "cool ok! so what colors can i have then?"

new pokemon confirmed to be the first 'Gay' type in the series

blogger obtains long-coveted zero note post: "I just kept talking until I hit upon the shit no one cares about"

in the hour or so it took me to draw this op turned reblogs off

this post will not allow me to find peace