i dont know the context but i cant stop watching this tiktok

the drama???? the energy???? the facial expressions???

this brings me joy i cant explain

this is what DND should feel like

Blue lives matters is just another way for racist to be racist. Keep your blue lives matters to yourself.

Creator • @mattxiv

if queer is a standalone identity and ppl can just ID as it then i can do the same with fag. sexuality? fag. gender? fag. sorry it’s reclaimed

I never understood people who just claimed they were queer. Like, if I’m having a convo and I’m like “I’m bi” and they say “oh yeah, I’m queer” WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN???? What am I suppose to get out of that????? That could mean ANYTHING to the LGBTQIASS2ALMPA+ community these days. What does queer even mean to people anymore?????

Tbh the people I know who ID as queer are all NB so they can’t really say gay or lesbian, and unless they’re bi I don’t think there are specific labels for NB attracted to women or NB attracted to men etc. Its easier just to say queer when the only “labels” availible to you are some slew of mogai terms

I guess that makes sense for NB people but again, what is that suppose to convey to me??? What is that suppose to tell me????

Here’s a truly radical thought… 

It doesn’t have to convey anything to you. A person’s sexuality is not your business. Their gender identity is not your business. They don’t have to give a shit what it conveys to you, you entitled little goblin. 

boy if you don’t giddyup

God I️ wish that were me

Me when someone keeps misgendering me

an alternate version for trans girls

WHAT AN AMAZING ADDITION TO MY POST!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!

So I started watching this Japanese dating show on Netflix called Rea(L)ove, where every contestant is looking for love and each has a “dark secret” that they have to reveal to the other contestants at random times, and hope that the others still accept them. Some are addicted to sex, some have a lot of debt, some have a criminal record and so on. So there is this one girl who likes one of the guys despite him being rude at times, and he choosesto go on a solo date with her. Towards the end of their date, the hosts make her share her secret with him, and it goes as follows:

he had an almost speechless and shocked response, he didn’t say anything negative or positive really, just the two hosts kept laughing and saying very rude remarks. The scene just kind of ended with them walking away and then their individual thoughts on the date that pretty much boiled down to:

and

So the next day, the girls, this time,  get to choose a guy to go on a date with…

WILL HE????

HE DID!

So now, on the date—–

Sorry for the long post, but this was one of the sweetest things I’ve seen in a long time, and I was literally crying and just needed to share this with someone

SPOILER ALERT: THEY CHOSE EACH OTHER AT THE END!!!!!!!!

Me:

((see my other post for his heartbreaking dark secret))

This thread is the purest form of girls having girls backs.

Facts about aces:

But most importantly

Reminder for Trans Women

You don’t have to be hyper feminine to be valid.

All women wear baggie ratty clothes that are comfy sometimes or all the time. All women go to the store or go to work without makeup or just never really wear makeup if it’s not really her. All women forego nail polish at times.

Hyper femininity is a lot of work and as a woman you’re allowed to just be.

All the femininity you need is inside you and may those that want to take that away from you lose their voice irrevocably before they can try.

Don’t do drugs, ladies and gents. 😂😭😂😭😂😭

this man’s camerawork…

STAHHHHHP

Me in 2015

I think I’m addicted to this post

it’s so hilarious to me that straight women think they are so irresistible to us gay women that we are just waiting to pounce on them as soon as we’re in the same space like nah we can smell your homophobia from miles away you fucking gremlins

reblog to kill the predatory lesbian myth

This but also cis lesbians about trans lesbians

reblog again to kill the predatory trans women myth

Source

Some people are so against “pregnant people” because it includes trans men and nb folks that they don’t seem to realize it includes cis women and girls.

A huge number of trans men have said that the term triggers their dysphoria but alright

Alright.

No, I won’t just say “pregnant women.” Because I’m talking about pregnant people, women included.

How many trans men do you know of who want to be pregnant?

It’s ridiculous to try to change language to be inclusive of the 0.0001% at most. Just because pre-T trans men CAN get pregnant doesn’t mean they do except in VERY rare cases. I can’t think of anything that would trigger a trans man’s dysphoria more.

Actual trans man here!!!! I had a baby and you know what was triggering??? People lumping me in with women literally constantly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My entire pregnancy everything was about pregnant women!!!! I was constantly referred to as a pregnant woman in all of the resources and literature!!!!!! Not to mention the fact that people like you are the reason I wasnt able to find gender neutral or masculine pregnancy clothing!!!! So I was uncomfortable literally ALL THE TIME

But you’re going to sit here and PRETEND to care about men like me who WILLINGLY go through pregnancy and child birth by…. Refusing to recognize that we exist in far greater number than you think?? You’re literally going to sit there and use us as a weapon against… US???? What kind of fucked up next level transphobia is that??????

We exist, we’re here, and just because you’re transphobic doesn’t give you the right to use our names in your crusade against us. Pregnancy was triggering in its own ways, but you know what? I would do it a billion times over for my child. I would go through all of it again and again and again for them. It can’t be helped that that was what was necessary to bring them into the world

But what CAN be helped is transphobic people like you not exacerbating our dysphoria by insisting on calling us women just because you don’t like acknowedging that we exist. I’m not a fucking mythical unicorn that you can pull out to try and win arguments. I’m real. Sorry that this is inconvenient for you.

Second trans man weighing in here. I also have been pregnant, a total of three times. The first resulted in the birth of my daughter, and I knew I was trans before getting pregnant. After having her we realized that my window for having the second child that we wanted was closing because my dysphoria was getting worse and worse and I ended up having a miscarriage at 8 weeks, which sucked, and then a miscarriage at 22 weeks, which as devastating because 1) 22 weeks was a fucking long time to fight through dysphoria only for a pregnancy to fail, 2) i knew that my dysphoria was bad enough that I could never put myself through this again, so our dream of having 2 kids was over and 3) my temporary physician’s refusal to listen to me when I said that I would never be pregnant again and to please schedule me for a d&c was flat out ignored because she was certain I’d change my mind and decide to have another baby and wouldn’t let me do anything that wasn’t let the tissue pass naturally, which is unfortunate because my body straight up hung onto it for six fucking months. I spent half a year that I desperately wanted to be considering a plan for transitioning going in for weekly blood tests to measure my levels, of having people, doctors, nurses, blood lab technicians telling me that it was okay, I’d “get to be a mommy again” as soon as this was all cleared up.

So much of having children is centred around being a mother, being a woman, the gift of motherhood. I hated every second of that, and that was all anyone could talk about through all of it. But you know what? I still had a baby. What would you have me do? Pretend I didn’t? Throw either myself or my husband under the bus every time someone asks how we managed to acquire a baby? How our family exists? Who do I devalue? Whose contribution is less important? Who has to pretend that they’re not genetically related to our child, who gets the credit for how fucking hard it was to bring her into this world, into a family that loves her more than anything?

Pregnancy was not easy, and it was even harder because of my dysphoria. I sacrificed a LOT to make our family happen, and I would rather be counted among ‘pregnant people’ than ‘pregnant women’, and I certainly don’t want to hide my hard fucking work to make others feel comfortable.

Trans men can and do have their own children pre, mid and post transition, and we’re far more common than you seem to think we are. Don’t speak on our behalf, especially when we’re loudly telling you to stay in your own lane.

Im a trans man who plans on getting pregnant quite soon i prefer ‘pregnant person’ and while I’m pregnant if anyone calls me a pregnant woman i am going to slap them.

While we’re at it, the insistence on equating pregnancy with motherhood/womanhood is the exact kind of thing that makes people think they can only refer to sperm-producing parents as “the father”, which is also infuriating (if not quite as infuriating as it would be to be pregnant on top of that)

I’m not trans or non binary, so if you are one of those things, feel free to disagree with me because you know better.

But like, it’s unfair to ask men to be more involved in child rearing without allowing the men who can carry babies have kids. Or allowing them to, but calling them mothers. It reminds me of how stigmatized men are for taking care of kids. Or hell, even calling them “mommy dads” or whatever.

We know trans men exist. And we should acknowledge their masculinity despite whatever parts they may have. And just like what we should expect from any other man in 2017, we should expect men to be able to do an equal amount of child rearing as possible, and that can include carrying the baby if they have a womb.

Let men have babies 2K17. Let NB people have babies too btw. 2K17.

As a trans dude, I 100% agree. I even have my own story to add on about the whole “mommy dads” thing.

After coming back into state to stay with my wife’s “family” (we don’t call them that now, but we did at the time due to being related) until we could get a place. We were there most of my pregnancy and when I legally changes my documents.

It was her “father”, his wife, and their 3 kids.

Around comes mother’s day. I’m up in the morning, probably didn’t go to bed yet. She comes over and wishes me a happy mother’s day. I made kinda an awkward smile and wished her one as well.

Later she tells my wife she didn’t even think before saying it (no shit)

But it was okay! Cause fathers can be mothers too!

She literally fuckin said that.

No. That’s not how it works.

Trans man here with a 6 day old infant who was planned and much wanted and deeply loved. We exist in far far greater numbers than people seem to think. A lot of trans men want to have families the same as everyone else and a lot of us do. I have the equipment so I used it and I’m very glad I did. But everything regarding pregnancy being automatically woman-oriented was incredibly hard for me to deal with whilst facing dysphoria. ‘So few trans men do it that there’s no need to change the language!’ - bullshit. Changing the language we use regarding pregnancy and childbirth does no harm to women at all and helps those of us who aren’t women. It doesn’t have any negative outcome. It is literally just including everyone. If you’re against that, your transphobia is showing.

“Pre-T trans men can get pregnant” so can trans men who have been on T for years. You’re one of those cis people who think as soon as a trans guy starts T his afab organs stop working. That’s not the case at all. And another thing, don’t speak for trans men. You are not one, you do not know how we feel. Some of us are disgusted by the idea of pregnancy and some of us like the idea. If you haven’t done enough research to know that then maybe you shouldn’t speak for us, yeah?

hey so protip if you have abusive parents and need to get around the house as quietly as possible, stay close to furniture and other heavy stuff because the floor is settled there and it’s less likely to creak

Also. Breath with your mouth and not your nose. Your nose will whistle. Trust me. If you need to get into your fridge, jab your finger into the rubber part that seals the door closed and create a tiny airway. This will prevent the suction noise when you open the door. When drinking liquids (juice mostly), pour out your glass (or chug from the jug) and replace what you drank with water. If it was full enough in the beginning, no one will notice. DO NOT STEAL ALCOHOL. THEY WILL NOTICE IF IT’S WATERED DOWN. Bring a pillowcase for dried foods like cereal and granola. It helps to muffle the sound it makes when it pours.

If your house has snack packs (like gummy bears or crackers or chips), count them every day until you know the rhythm that they get consumed. (This took me a week and a half with my twin brother and sister). Then join the rhythm when you make your nightly visits. It will be that much harder to figure out it was you.

KEEP A TRASH BAG UNDER YOUR BED FOR WRAPPERS AND STUFF BUT DONT FORGET TO THROW IT OUT WHENEVER YOU CAN. BUGS YKNOW. Hope this helped.

I might have some useful info to add.

-a jar of peanut butter is long lasting and easy to hide under a bed or in a dresser drawer. I lived off of jars of peanut butter and boxes of saltine crackers I would buy on grocery trips with my mom.

-two words: Slipper Socks. These are the socks that have rubber designs on the bottom for grip. They make no noise, and also keep you steady on slicker surfaces like tile and wood. You can find them cheap at Walmart. They also keep your feet more protected if you’re outside.

-if you’re secure enough in your room to have a small food stash, make sure you’re not too obvious about it (duh) but also move its location every few days. I kept mine in a shoebox under my bed, then switched it to a backpack in my closet, then wedged between my bookshelf and wall, and I would cycle locations until i moved it permanently to a false-bottomed drawer I installed in my dresser when my father was gone for a weekend. I would NEVER put food directly into my stash after taking it. I would keep it in pockets of my clothes and between books until everyone went to sleep, then I’d stock and stow my stash for the next few days.

-get a water bottle with a filter in it. I used to be able to reach my bathroom from my bedroom door down the hall using a huge step or minor jump/leap. If I was afraid of being caught at night, I’d fill up the humidifier tank we kept under our sink while I took a short shower, and would refill my water that way. It might not be the best option, but I kept a small stockade of water under my bed for emergencies.

-if you can, smuggle your garbage out in your backpack or purse. Dispose of it at work/school. I got caught twice by carelessly throwing away packaging.

-if someone knows the situation you’re going through (close friend/partner/etc) see if there’s a way for them to get food or other supplies to you at school or work or what private time you may get. A hidden first aid kit literally saved parts of my body before and I owe it to a close friend.

-try learning the building’s natural rhythm. The house I grew up in would creak and settle heavily every night for 3-5 minutes. That was my shot, and I had to be QUICK. I still got caught a few times, but learning the patterns in our floors and walls, when they creaked, WHERE they creaked, kept me going. Eventually I was sprinting in slipper socks to the kitchen and back in less than 90 seconds.

-if you have stairs, or live upstairs. Sit as you go down them one at a time, or climb up them like an animal. It keeps you low/out of lots of motion sight, and also can reduce noise and creaking by distributing weight over more than 1-2 steps.

-You can use common hand sanitizer to remove the stains certain snack foods leave behind (coughs cheeto fingers) and a dry toothbrush can help scrub the color off your tongue. If you can get powdered toothpaste or toothpaste tabs to keep on hand, it makes a huge difference in sneakiness.

-I don’t recommend going for dried foods like granola or cereal unless you can sneak it to a secure place to get it. It’s too loud, it’s a gamble every time for something with less caloric intake than it’s worth if you get caught. Of course, there are times when that’s the only option!!

-if you’re taking milk, add water, but be SURE to shake/agitate the bottle to distribute the dairy fat with the water. I got into the habit of shaking milk jugs when I started sneaking it, and explained the habit as something I read in an old comic strip my father showed me. (Back when whole milk had a lot more cream fats and they’d separate, so shaking it would redistribute the cream.) I still shake milk jugs to this day.

-if your windows open or don’t have screens, eat leaning out an open window. Any food mess will be lost in the dirt. I was lucky I had bushes and birds outside that would catch my granola bar crumbs before anyone could notice.

-canned goods are tempting, but not worth it. It requires too many tools (can opener/strained sometimes/utensils/some need heat) stick to thinks like various nut butters (sunflower/peanut/almond), crackers, dried fruit, and easy to conceal food bars (nature valley/nutrigrain/etc.) dried ramen packets are good uncooked if you can stand the texture. Apple sauce and pudding cups are also easier to sneak and stash than one might think, and can be eaten with your fingers. The only canned foods I recommend are condensed soups and precooked pasta (spaghetti-o’s). You can easily mix them with a little bit of hot water from the tap and get something more sustaining than a handful of captain Crunch. The cans are cheap, sometimes recyclable, and drinking soup takes way less time than chewing solid food.

-if you menstruate, attempt to stash pads/tampons in a safe location. Sometimes shit happens. Pads can work as bandages in emergency situations. Sometimes shark week comes unexpectedly. If you can sneak a roll of toilet paper or paper towels, these are also life savers.

-plastic utensils from takeout containers can be hidden inside socks and will be worth their weight in gold when you least expect it. I bought myself a tiny plastic bowl from the dollar store and kept cheap trinkets in it on my desk so it didn’t seem like a bowl I was eating out of. You could try this with something like a mason jar, which is also useful for drinking out of or storing water.

-if you’re eating a crunchy or solid food, try soaking it in water. Mushy food can be repulsive in texture, but I could clock the sound of someone eating a nature valley oat bar from like 6 miles away. Dunking it in water (or using a secret bowl+water) can reduce noise, and also eating time since you don’t have to chew as much.

-keep a laundry bar or tide pen on you. Laundry bars are super useful, a little hard to find though. I washed a lot of stains out of my clothes with laundry bars in my bathroom sink as a kid. Not proud if it, but it kept me flying under the radar at school.

-clear rubber bands, plain twine or string, paper clips, and thumb tacks. Indescribably useful. I once rigged a system to open tricky cabinets and get objects from inside using two paper clips and a foot of plain string like a mock lasso system.

-if you’re pulling objects from tall cabinets, use your chest or stomach to cushion them. Let them fall into your torso and then into your hands cradled underneath. Not as loud, not as much grabbing, if someone sees it they can mistake it for it falling on you by the body language.

-get a bandana. Or four. Napkins, bandages, tool, and accessory all in one.

-get a tiny sewing kit. I’m talking 3 needles and a spool of thread tiny. Scissors if you can sneak it. See things into your clothes. Make hidden pockets or compartments. Threadbanger on YouTube did a video a few years ago about sneaking things into music festivals using tiny clothing mods, but they may be useful in sneaking money or medicine.

-on the topic of sneaking money. don’t take bills, take change. If your abusers don’t meticulously count their nickels and pennies, they’re an easy(ish) way to build up a tiny savings pool. I found nickels the least noticed coin I took, even more than pennies, and taking two every few nights from where they’d be tossed on our countertop soon built up to a semi-reliable fund I passed off to someone to get me food for my stash without having to sneak it from the kitchen. As soon as I became “independent” in my food storage, I was subjected to much less scrutiny. I managed to build up a solid 1-2 week ration supply after hoarding change.

-you can tape SD cards to the inside of book dust covers(the part that folds inside the actual cover of the book), if you have a sewing kit or zipper on it inside the stuffing of your pillow (trim a corner, stuff it inside, stitch it closed) or (this is final resort) VERY CAREFULLY remove the covering from your outlet and tape it to the wall stud before replacing the casing. I kept mine inside part of my wooden bed frame that I hollowed out using, you guessed it, take out silverware knives and 4 nights without sleep.

-THE FLOOR IS LAVA WAS KEY TRAINING FOR ME AS A CHILD. I learned to take pillows with me, climb on furniture to disrupt my flow of movement, toss a pillow down, and use that to cushion any rattle our living room could give off as I crept to the kitchen from the side entrance so my mom’s dog wouldn’t bark or alert anyone. I highly suggest crawling around on all fours like some sort of beast to stay out of sight.

-can you run your house blindfolded?? If you can’t. Maybe you should try to learn. I suffered some heavy eye traumas growing up and had a collective 3-4 months just IN THE DARK. Eyes bandaged, left alone. It was terrible, but damn if I couldn’t navigate the whole place silently, without any visual cues. This helps a lot with the whole moving around in the dark thing, too. Listening is obviously key.

-if your parents start getting suspicious, or you’re suspicious they’re getting suspicious, watch out for traps. String on the ground that gets shifted when you walk on it. Baby powder or flour left to track footprints or doors opening/closing. My dad was partial to wrapping a bungee cord around my doorknob and attaching it to the closet across the hallway. I wouldn’t be able to open my door enough to get out, or if I did, I risked ruining the structural integrity of the wrappings he did, and he would notice.

-learn to tie some knots. Strong ones. They’ll come in handy at one point or another.

-remember that you’re not totally alone. There’s people out there for you. Wanting to make everything better. You don’t deserve what’s happening, it isn’t normal, and you will eventually find help. But staying safe is important, and you are important.

It upsets me that people might need to know these but I know it could really help someone by reblogging

ALWAYS REBLOG

My kink is exclusionists crying when they’re kicked out of queer spaces for their bigotry.

it’s literally ideology like this that makes me scared to join my college’s lgbt group. it’s not “bigotry” when someone believes cishet people aren’t lgbt and that’s not worth people being thrown out of what they considered a safe space

This is hilarious you’re scared to be seen as a bigot when there’s a simple cure for that: stop being a bigot. Ace and aro people have been part of the LGBT+ community for years, and your little online tantrum isn’t going to change that. Accept that, or realize that most irl queer groups are going to want nothing to do with your hateful ass.

If someone is ace or aro then they aren’t het - why is this so hard to understand? Like. The words are not the same????

Asexual =/= heterosexual

Aromantic =/= heteroromantic

Also yeah. My uni’s queer group had no space for exclusionism or TERFs, because that is bullshit rhetoric.

I mean, the whole argument against ace/aro people being in queer spaces because it means other queer folks are ‘being forced to share a space with their oppressors’… It falls apart when you realise that trans folks in a group with cis gays and lesbians are sharing a space with their oppressors. Or queer POC in a group with queer white people. Or gays in a group with lesbians because of misogyny. Or bi/pan folks in a group with gays and lesbians, because of monosexism/biphobia.

You can still be fucking straight omg. A boy who only fucks women but can’t love them is not “queer” and can stay 1000 miles away from me at all times because that’s just average every day misogyny. A married straight woman who doesn’t feel sexual attraction to her husband (and other men) but still has sex anyway because she’s a sex positive asexual is still straight! These people have nothing in common with the LGBT community, no shared interests or common goals.

And gays don’t oppress bisexuals you fucking numbskull.

“And gays don’t oppress bisexuals you fucking numbskull.”

How about when bis get told they’re just greedy? Or when they’re told they shouldn’t go to queer events because they have an (apparently) opposite gendered partner? And/or get told they’re a straight couple even if both parties are queer just because they look like a cis man and woman in a relationship? Or when they’re told they aren’t really bi, they’re just too chicken to be gay/lesbian? Or when they get told they’re indecisive? Or are just equal opportunity sluts?

These are all things I’ve heard gay- or lesbian-identifying people say about bisexuals in real life.

Imagine thinking it’s oppression to be told that your male/female relationship is heterosexual when there are people in same sex relationships being thrown in jail and tortured and murdered :/

Maybe don’t have conversations about things you have no understanding of in future? The things you’re talking about aren’t oppression. They aren’t even all wrong/bi exclusive lmao

I have plenty of understanding about this, thanks.

Did I say that people in same sex relationships don’t matter? Or that the harassment, assault, abuse, or death of those individuals doesn’t matter? No. I didn’t even imply it. One can be concerned about multiple issues in a community. This post just doesn’t happen to be about

Also, yes, they’re all wrong. Not always; they may apply to specific people, but to generalise and apply them to all bi (or pan or whatever) folks is them inaccurate.

To be told you’re straight because you happen to appear to be a cisgendered heterosexual couple is erasure.

My partner identifies as a man, but he’s definitely queer and I appear to be a cis woman, but am also definitely queer. I’ve personally been told by gay and lesbian folks that we shouldn’t attend certain events because straight couples aren’t welcome - when neither of us are straight. And even if we were only attracted to the men for me or women for him, we’re queer in other ways that have nothing to do with who we’re attracted to.

Additionally, I never said bi/pan/et c folks never say anything homophobic. Don’t put words on my mouth.

You don’t know what you’re talking about if you think being told that your relationship is heterosexual constitutes oppression while people in same sex relationships are actually oppressed. You’re fucking vile honestly, the privilege and entitlement is just dripping from everything you say 😷

It’s erasure, and erasure is a form of oppression. It’s not the only form of course, but it is one of them. I never claimed that folks in same gender relationships aren’t also oppressed, but there is a history (and current experience) of intracommunjry discrimination against bi folks. One type of oppression doesn’t invalidate the other. I’m not going to play oppression olympics with you, as it serves no purpose and only detracts from the actual conversation.

Where is the entitlement? Please provide an example if you’re going to make the claim.

Being told the truth isn’t oppression, kid

Definitely not a kid, not for quite some time. I’d ask that you not address me that way.

Still waiting for evidence of entitlement.

Also evidence of a lack of oppression if you’re going to make that claim.

Terfs, terfs everywhere. Y'all exclusionists like @an-angry-lesbian and @sapphics get upset at being excluded when you say the most offensive shit. You’re excluded because you scream cishet and say bisexuals have straight privilege when bisexuals are demonized by straight people. When you gays say bisexuals are confused and not a true sexuality. You constantly enforce you can either be straight or gay like your dreaded straights. Asexuals get included while exclusionists are kicked out because the LGBT+ community isn’t just for gay men and lesbians. Queer spaces aren’t just for lesbians and gay men.