i am fine thank you for asking! though recently there has been a darkness growing within me

“hey do you have any cool plans for the break?”

Life hacks

This just stabbed me in my childhood

its kind of sad when you hit up and old friend and you both really miss each other but the connection just isnt there anymore

physically, yes, i could fight a bird. but emotionally? imagine the toll

lil matt damon SNAPPED

He looks exactly like Matt Damon

the finger points 😭😭

Him and this gif have the same energy

He dragged him for not listening lmao

Shawn Mendes: *exists*

Me: I stan one (1) white guy

Tom Holland: *exists too*

Me: I stan two (2) white guys

Nick Robinson: *exists x3*

Me: i stan three (3) goddamn white guys

K.j Apa: *eXiSTs

Me; becoming noticeably bothered: I stan three (3) and a half (½) white guys

Dylan O’Brien: *mEgA ExiStS*

Me:

having siblings be like

I went to the farmer’s market yesterday and at the honey guy’s booth and there were all these bees just hangin out.  Checking out the beeswax tabs, floating around the honey jars, not being aggressive, just really gentle and investigating or something

and as he was giving me a sample of the wildflower honey one of them landed on his hand and he just took a drop from the jar and dabbed it on his hand for the bee, and when I asked if they were his bees he said “No, but they show up every time I come out, I think they just know my truck” and this guy is well-known among the local bees and lets them sit on his hand and eat his honey and I just really like the bee guy

What more of an endorsement could you hope for

you met a fucking forest nymph

The end…

That was savage

O B L I T E R A T E D 

E V A P O R A T E D

EVERY SINGLE TIME

so apparently when my sister and i were little we took golfing classes and we got kicked out after a week. the reason being that the old white male instructor kept calling my 4 year old sister Maria “Mary” after she told him several times that her name is pronounced Maria. anyway, at one point, he tells her “well, that doesn’t matter anymore. you’re in America now.” and that distressed my sister so much that she hit him with her golf club.

that’s not what did the damage, though. what fucked that old dude up is that i saw my sister hit him from where i was standing and i ran over and started beating him with MY golf club. my mom says that i didn’t know what the hell was happening, but i squared up.

that’s why we got kicked out.

I love the guy who’s clearly a teacher who came over with the intent to tear two fucking idiot teenagers apart from each other only to find these fucking nerds it probably made his entire month

seth everman going WILD in the background

once a lady told me that if my plants are dying even when I’m caring for them correctly, it means they’re absorbing the curses my enemies are casting upon me. so now when my plants randomly die, I wonder if they died protecting me.

Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive.

If you care about me, fucking act like it

wнαт тнe ғυcĸ ιѕ тнιѕ?

Elmo’s voice saying “I’ll fuck u up” is the best and worst thing ever

YO I SWEAR THIS SHIT IS TOO FUNNY😭🤣