Ghost AU

Steve pressed his lips over the question, and gave his head a light shake. “I realized I might have been a bit of a dunce myself,” he offered. “Getting defensive without thinking about your situation as well. To you, I’m just as much of an intruder. The least I can do is try to help make us feel less like that to the other, right? And if not sitting in a specific seat is the start of it, it’s an easy enough thing to do.”

He gave the ghost a wry smile. “But I’m not scientist. Actually figuring out how all that works is up to you, pal. Something’s keeping you up here when you’re not just trying to spite me - ” And that’s what it felt like, for the foot that was now dangling lower than the other where Steve couldn’t see it - “I hope for your sake you can get it worked out. And I’ll just have to hope for mine that my friends don’t think I’m the one that’s crazy - right?”

He thought that would be a pretty good start for them. If Loki could figure out how to sit without sinking to (or through) the floor, they might actually be able to act like real roommates - and wouldn’t that be a nice thing to have? Steve hadn’t had a roommate in a long time. It wasn’t that he was lonely, after all, but the company… the appeal of company was beginning to settle in.

Loki hummed a bit, a note of almost approval at the way Steve referred to himself as a dunce. If he could admit that he’d been a bit defensive and that things had gotten out of hand, well. Perhaps things didn’t have to be quite so harsh between them. And perhaps Loki would get a chance to actually live a life again (in his own small way). Maybe... Maybe things could work.

“To be fair, this was never my place. I just died here. But, I see your point. And I accept your peace offer,” he said, pulling his foot back up. “It might not be easy. Especially since I had a reputation for being a little shit and I might not make it easy for you, simply out of boredom. And even without that? You should avoid getting too comfortable with me, lest you forget what I am and accidentally bring me up in conversation.”

Then again, that was Steve’s problem. He would be the one who needed to manage his dead friend versus his live ones and while he did that, Loki would be the one learning the extent of his ghostly abilities. Something he would have amble opportunity to do, since Steve was staying and Loki wouldn’t be fading any time soon. “So,” he said. “I guess we have a deal. I’d offer to shake your hand on it, but...”

Ghost AU

“But I know you’re here,” Steve insisted quietly, biting his lip as he looked to the other man. He was relieved to see that Loki seemed to take the apology for what it was, and seemed to mostly accept it. But they had a lot to work on if that was the ghost’s attitude. Steve couldn’t imagine how it must have felt, being alive and still being treated as though he didn’t exist. He could imagine, however, that all of this afterlife difficulty had only hurt that more.

He had to make sure Loki didn’t continue to feel that way, not now that Steve could see him and talk to him. He gave him an imploring look. “And I want you to know it’s yours, at least when it’s just us. I’ll do my best with friends over, too, and I - ” The issue would undoubtedly come up, but Steve knew he’d just have to stay positive for it. He wouldn’t let Loki feel left out anymore.

Steve purses his lips lightly. “I wanna figure this out. You’re not going through the floor, right? So that’s maybe a good start, maybe we can really make the seat yours.” He was full of determination now to do so, looking to the chair.

“So?” Loki asked. “You’ve already made it clear once that it was a silly thing to ask for. That you can hardly be expected to keep it clear for me at any given time.” He tilted his head. “So what changed? Why, all of a sudden, do you want to give me the chair, potentially make a fool of your self in front of your friends for the sake of someone who is not even alive?”

What an odd human. Limited as the offer was - and it was, ‘at least’ always meant limitations and limitations meant that nothing ever came for free - it was still a strange but well meant and heartfelt attempt to make something right. And Loki couldn’t see why. For the life of him - or death, really - he couldn’t understand what had brought such a drastic change in attitude. A peace treaty and an offer to try to be nicer did not mean he had to give up the chair.

Narrowing his eyes a little in thought, he put some more weight - for lack of better term - on his right leg, letting it sink through the floor board and leave him crooked. “Gravity and the laws of physics hardly hold much power over me anymore. What is to say I don’t go straight through the chair if I relax?” Not that Loki knew the science behind being a ghost. He just needed to push Steve that little bit further. See how much he meant his offer.

Steve flushed lightly, and then wondered why that was. There was almost something - no, there was something positively dirty in Loki’s implication whether he’d intended it or not, and Steve wasn’t sure if he wanted to hurdle past it to see how far it went. He opened and closed his mouth not unlike a fish for a moment while he struggled with the words he was looking for, eyes a little wide at the other man in abject dumbfounded horror.

“No limits!” he finally managed hastily. “That’s what I meant. I mean… not everything is pushing limits, I assume. I see you in the cafeteria all the time, after all, and I’ll bet you’re one of those kinds that likes to stay home and cook?” He raised an eyebrow hopefully, relying on that casual push of conversation as he leaned a little towards the passenger side of the jeep. It was a good cover, he thought, and technically it was valid. He’d been looking not to stress the other guy out anymore, after all.

Shit, but those sounded boring. And desperate, Steve thought as he swallowed a grimace. Maybe Loki wouldn’t think much of it other than what Steve was looking for there - good company in a finally decent way to spend it.

Well. That look of horror had decidedly not been what Loki had been hoping for. And for what seemed the millionth time, Loki wondered why this man had him continously giving in to this new desire to exit his comfort zone in search for something more. Because it kept yielding the same results - and none of them were screaming ‘yes, I am interested even if you came on way too strong and dumped all your personal baggage on me too fast too soon.’

His expression transforming into a frown, he could only watch as the other man kept staring, and he quietly wondered if he should just leave - if nothing else so he wouldn’t have to watch that expression in response to his stupid and ill adviced attempt at flirting. But before he could actually make himself do it, the other man seemed to come back to the moment.

Loki wasn’t sure what to make of the suggestions. Or the undercurrent of a grimace-that-didn’t-quite-come-to-be. “I don’t really have much of a kitchen,” he said with a shrug, frown only lessening somewhat. Which was true. He did like cooking, but he never had the time because he was always working and his kitchen consisted of a sink, a fridge/freezer combo, a tiny microwave/convection oven combo and a stovetop. Though he wasn’t sure he wanted Steve in his apartment yet. Not when he was so confused about what the other man wanted and he’d already come across pretty strongly without overly positive results. The smart thing to do would be to be a little more cautious. Not freak Steve out and protect himself in one go. “Certainly not one with space enough for us both. And I don’t really have much food either. But we can go to the cafeteria if you want.” Though Loki wasn’t sure how Steve would feel about that. Especially given the fact that Loki was by no means the cool kid - and the way the others had looked at him out in the valley.

Steve took the impact with a shock, pushed back on his haunches and then to the floor as he found Loki suddenly on top of him. Eyes flew open wide with the shock, a cough as he was winded before everything sort of came together. He laid his hands against Loki’s arms to try to fight him off, but it was immediately apparent that he wasn’t attacking Steve, just… trying to stop him, stop all of this. So Steve continued to stare, wide-eyed and completely still as the brunet burnt himself out. He barely moved even when Loki finally went still and quiet, shocked out of his own words.

“Loki…” he said quietly, still clinging to the man’s sleeves as he tried to figure out just what he was saying. He wanted to argue, wanted to tell him exactly what was going on, but… Maybe that was what he was trying to say, more than Steve was really ready to hear. He stayed still for a moment before biting his lip and furrowing his brow. “Okay,” he finally said, “okay. We’ll… we’ll stop. Just… Christ, Loki, just tell me what you want… Anything.”

Barely noticing that, despite, having pushed a little back, he was still effectively straddling Steve, he just sat back on his haunches and ran his fingers through his hair, letting out a long and steadying breath. “I’m trying,” he groused, though the frustration was clearly aimed as much at himself as it was at Steve. “I’m freaking trying.”

Letting his hands fall back down and land on his thighs with a sharp slapping noise, he looked back at Steve. “This sucks,” he stated, flatly and plainly. “I am tired of muddling around in things neither of us can make sense of. Because neither of us are really aware of what has and has not been said and in what way those things were meant to be taken. So I shall try to speak as plainly as I can.

“You’re being an idiot,” he started. “You’re sending me mixed signals, you conduct your peace offerings in seclusion, and you’re blaming me for not getting it.” Then, before Steve could protest, Loki pushed a hand against his chest in an ‘I’m still talking, stay focused before you bitch at me’ gesture, he added “but I have clearly played the fool myself. In expecting that talking about my issues would help you understand and make you feel more mildly about how all has been handled on my behalf and magically fix what has transpired. So let’s... strike this prior mess from the record and start over.”

Swan Prince AU

He continued to reach for Loki’s lips even as the prince spoke, glad to feel the same desperation in the other man. Steve easily helped him in removing his vest, practically tearing at the ties keeping it together as he tried to throw it off. He discarded it behind himself when it was gone and didn’t even wait for the brunet’s hands on him before he was pulling the tunic off all the same. It too was discarded behind him as he grinned up mischievously at his new lover.

“Sneaky,” Steve murmured, a pleased and teasing smile spreading across his face. “You were always so sneaky, Loki. I love it, we’ll keep it in mind.” But he pulled the other man down so that they could begin to work towards the after, catching the back of his head with a quick hand so he could pull him back into a kiss. Steve’s free hand ran a light trail along Loki’s newly freed skin, tracing the smoothness and relishing it under padded, callous fingers.

“Come on,” the blond urged as his hand found the waistband of Loki’s pants, and he gave it an experimental tug from the back, both testing their ease and begging the other man to help him removing them. Steve released plump lips so that he could sit back entirely, looking to those breeches and moving to work at the front. “I want to see you, Loki. Finally, I want to see all of you.”

Ghost AU

Well, that was… Not the response he’d been expecting, either. Steve blinked after the other man, having been prepared to go right back to where they’d started as soon as the words had been out of his mouth. But Loki had taken a surprisingly turn back, and Steve… had misinterpreted him again. He made a wild gesture of frustration once Loki’s back was turned, and briefly banged on his forehead with his palms in punishment of being a complete dick against before looking to follow the ghost.

He hurried up behind him, struggling over the words as he looked for them. His mouth opened and closed a few times behind Loki before he finally stepped forward and just a little in front of the moving figure, hoping the other man wouldn’t go straight through him. “Loki…” he said quietly, giving him an imploring look as he stopped and gave a quick look around. “I…” What words could he say to make up for being an ass? “I, uh… Forgot which seat was yours. This one, right?”

He gestured to the correct seat that he definitely hadn’t forgotten, giving the other man a small smile. “I sure as hell hope so, because otherwise I’m going to look pretty crazy suddenly telling people another seat is the worst for watching the television.” His expression continued to be questioning, hopeful as he waited for the other man to accept his sort of… quiet apology.

Having expected the other to follow (which seemed a reasonable expectation, since the obvious alternative was to keep standing in the hallway), Loki still didn’t think that Steve was going try and block him (in his own way). Mostly because he didn’t see a reason why he would. Evidently, Steve wasn’t so sure of the reason behind this either. 

Waiting patiently didn’t stop Loki from raising an eyebrow in confused expectation as the human looked wildly around and stammered while his mere presence clearly tried to keep him in place. He was just about to keep moving when Steve finally found something to say and it was not at all what he had expected. Still, he heard the apology and his look softened.

“It’s the one I asked for,” he agreed with a small nod, accepting the apology. Though he didn’t want to accept the chair. “But it’s fine. You were clearly unhappy and I don’t have a right to it. And it’s not like I have a use for it. It’s not like death makes it any more fun to be around people acting as if you aren’t there.” Sure, it would be nice to have a place that was his. But he also had to face that a seat didn’t equal belonging. “Besides,” he added, trying to lighten it up, “it’s not like I can actually sit in it anyway, right?”

race for the sun

Tony nodded and turned back to his own place. With his wrists cleaned and wrapped, their food was served to them and then the rest of their guests began to receive their meals. Tony waited until everyone at the head table had gotten their plates before he started eating. He and Loki would be setting the pace of the meal after all. When they started eating their guests could eat, when they took their first sip of wine, their guests could begin to drink as well. Tony always found the formality of that a little annoying since he could polish an entire meal before he even remembered to sip his water. 

So he ate some of the salad and took a sip from his wine. Getting it out of the way for everyone. His mother’s amused chuckle next to him made him smirk slightly. 

Tony had been to a number of weddings for other nobles and couple friends. And while it had been his idea to make sure that no kissing traditions were included in their ceremony and feast, Tony still felt like it left the entire thing lacking. Though, he was relieved himself. It was a political marriage, not a love match. 

And there were no speeches. 

Well, there were a couple speeches. Just nothing like he’d seen before. As the second course was being passed out, his parents had stood to deliver their own speech. Politically laced, even as they welcomed Loki into their family, thanked his parents for the alliance and their son, it was hardly like the speeches he’d heard at even a high ranking noble’s wedding. Just another reminder of what was taking place. 

He knew the invitation to make a speech had been extended to Loki’s mother and father, but he had no idea if they had accepted the offer. So he raised his glass of wine when his mother finished speaking and smiled charmingly to Loki as she wished them every happiness they could find together and sipped from his lass. 

When Loki wasn’t on display like he was tonight, his eating habits were not unlike Tony’s. He would typically drink, eat his meal, drink some more, finish his next course and so forth until he finished off with the rest of whatever beverage he had, only sipping a little while he was eating. But tonight where he was center of attention, he was too keenly aware of everyone’s gazes and he mirrored Tony by taking a sip and a bite, letting the meal commence.

But the rest of the time, Loki felt rather detached from it all. He didn’t speak unless spoken to or make small talk with his family. He wasn’t pouting or sulking, but he wasn’t smiling either. Now that the food was on the table and the ceremony done and the gossip centering on Tony (whether it be because of his hurt wrists or his elevated status), it barely felt like he was part of it.

Sure, he put on his most convincing smile on the rare occasion somebody did briefly engage him in conversation and he listened politely to their speeches, and it was obvious Loki was welcome in this new place - as a chess piece.

He was blaming both his own and Tony’s parents for this. And perhaps Tony for being stupid and/or disrespectful enough to get caught (he’d have guessed the former, but given their conversation earlier he couldn’t be sure it wasn’t the latter and that Tony just didn’t care) and for seeming to treat this as impersonally as everyone else did (and that more than anything made Loki dread the life to come; if Tony didn’t respect him and seemed to think of this as pure politics rather than a companionship, where else could Loki turn? The security guard who had snickered at him for his lacking English? Not likely). But mostly he was resenting their parents for never making an effort to have them bond or at least speak before. Instead Loki was being left here, in a place he didn’t know, with people who did not know him or care for him as a person. So long as he did what he was meant to, nobody around him gave a single fuck about how he was doing. Or so it all seemed to Loki. Despite being surrounded by people, he had never felt  lonelier in his life.

Even his parents’ speech weren’t a comfort. It was every bit as political as Maria and Howard’s had been, impersonal and designed to elicit the best response from the crowd rather than convey the most emotion. The most personal thing in the speech was a warm mention of Thor. Not even their request that they take good care of their youngest seemed as genuine, instead sounding as empty and meaningless as anything, though nobody reacted outwardly - even if Loki could tell the majority had heard it the exact same way Loki had.

Send me  “HC”  + a word and I’ll write a headcanon about it.

“I guess that’s doable.”

“Of course that presupposes you can keep up with me and my moves.”