Anime is still a mistake
anyone else horny as fuck right now
Literally what the fuck
Me: Haha wow she can jump pretty high
Me, five seconds later:
The look of horror
…is..is she gonna bring the hat back?
She didn’t even bring the fucking hat back
Love that he also types like an old man
His name is spelled Jonathan.
His birthday is September 4.
His age was estimated at the time he was found in 1882. This species matures at around 50 years old and he was past that age, so he might be older than 189 but we will never know.
He lives on a South Atlantic island, Saint Helena (aka the place Napoleon Bonaparte lived until his death in 1815) where he’s well taken care of by the governor of the island. According to his vet, he likes listening to tennis.
The average lifespan for his species is 150, but he’s super healthy aside from cataracts in both eyes and possible loss of smell.
Jonathan has a mate, Fred, who until recently was thought to be female. Fred is male.
His species (which is a subspecies of Aldabra giant Tortoise) are on the endangered list with only about 80 recorded worldwide. However, many giant Tortoises currently hold the record for longest living land animals with a few others’ ages ranging between 175-250 years. So Jonathan still has a while to go!
Here’s Jonathan (on the left) in 1882 upon his arrival to the island:
(photo courtesy of Guinness World Records)
Jonathan has lived through both world wars, the Russian Revolution, 39 U.S. presidents, 7 British monarchs, the creation of the typewriter, the completion of the Eiffel Tower, the coronation of Queen Victoria, the release of the first postage stamp, the building of the first skyscraper, the first photograph of a person, the first lightbulb, and the first powered flight.
According to Wikipedia Jonathan is still alive as of this writing 10/21/22, and as of 2022 is the oldest tortoise of recorded age ever, the previous contender having died at 189 in 1966.
This is more punk than the whole of punk history.
I’ll tell you what’s ferocious. Freddie’s comeback to Sid calling him “Freddie Platinum” when they were recording down the hall from each other at London’s Wessex Studios (Queen for News of the World, Pistols for Bollocks).
Sid Vicious made the mistake one day of bursting into Queen’s control room and antagonizing their frontman. “Have you succeeded in bringing ballet to the masses, then?” he sneered. “Oh, yes, Simon Ferocious,” Mercury replied. “We’re trying our best, dear.”
Then, according to Queen biographer Daniel Nester, Freddie rose from his chair and began to playfully flick the safety pins displayed on the front of Sid’s leather jacket. “Tell me,” he asked, “did you arrange these pins just so?” When Sid stepped forward in an attempt to intimidate Freddie, the singer simply pushed him backwards and inquired, “What are you going to do about it?” Sid immediately backed down. [x]
Freddie Mercury may very well have had the biggest dick energy of anyone who ever lived
you’re a fucking hamtaro blogger who the fuck cares what you think. stop making political posts and stick to posting hamtaro memes.
Are you mad that I get more pussy than you?
this website is wildly out of control
For clarification ^-^
art
me: i really need to talk this out with someone
my anxiety: ur coming off needy. isolate urself and handle it. all u need is U!
this is one of the Russian Chaos Agents tumblr banned lmao
honestly same
Why wouldn’t you tho?
pure goodness
this is the grown up version of jumping in a puddle as a kid
A hummingbird thought a man’s orange hat was a flower [x]
Iv never seen a hummingbird sit before lol
i wasn’t going to reblog until he sat
me snapping out of a depressive episode, trying to clean up the mess
there is absolutely nothing i love more than those russian gun memes
