Livin' la vida patético

*jokingly hits on you but means it 100%*

obama care. obama gently kiss your forehead. obama love

Nerd in the 1970s: “want to watch Star Trek re-runs in my basement and then read some Asimov?”

Nerd today: “which way to the Undertale orgy”

nerd in the 1200s: “is anybody else here literate”

These memes

I love that gif of the cat walking though the door with that big ass blanket

Do you ever start bullshitting a paper, and then look over it halfway through and think, ’…Wait a minute, I could be onto something here.’

this is the definition of college.

Literally I was writing a paper on Asian salt water crocodiles, like a simple about them paper for a college class, and I started noticing some inconsistencies in the scientific papers I was sourcing and I accidentally discovered that the crocodile has been misdiagnosed as least concerned on the endangered species list when they should be classified as endangered and now my professor is having me write a formal report to the international Red List to have them reclassified and all I wanted to do was write this paper on an animal I thought was cool and now I’m considered an expert on this species…

this is how it works half of esteemed biologists trip and fall into their specialty while pursuing something else. one lecturer i just went to started as a biochemist researching antibiotics and discovered that crocodiles change colors based on environment and now he has 30+ crocs in his yard for research purposes and he’s just like… “wait… i’m a chemist…”

How did so many people end up with crocodiles on accident?????

did it happen in florida

America is about to be that part in the lion king where where pride rock became all shitty bc Scar became king

have yet to see a better analogy

Are you implying Hilary Clinton’s daughter will assassinate Donald Trump because I’m okay with this

Actually, if we follow the narrative, I think it would be the Obama daughters. Which would be even MORE awesome.

Malia’s gonna fight Trump on the roof of the Whitehouse while it’s on fire.

while joe biden dresses in drag and does the hula as a diversion

i can’t articulate how much jude law: sexy pope embodies my 2017 mood 

listen if Snorlax can suddenly awaken and transform into something powerful and useful after 20 years of lying around doing fuck-all then maybe there’s hope for me yet

DO YOU EVER JUST WANNA SCREAM SO LOUD WHEN YOU TRY TO THINK ABOUT YOUR FUTURE

when u offer someone ur food just to be polite and they accept it 

when someone tries to come between you and your best friend

he’s not checking up on u…. go exfoliate or read a book