Go, with the promise of possibility!

Extraordinary attorney Woo

The really hilarious part is that the busted Yeti is even worse than this description makes it sound.

TL/DR version: the structural layout of the Expedition Everest attraction is so complicated that Disney had to use a technique called “previsualisaton” to construct it - essentially a four-dimensional blueprint that specifies not only how the structure should be put together, but the exact point in time that each step should occur. That precision in timing is actually kinda critical, because if certain parts of the structure are subject to stress too early (e.g., before the concrete is fully cured, before additional supports have been installed, etc.), they’ll be permanently weakened.

Well, long story short, when the ride went into action, Disney’s engineers quickly discovered that the numbers weren’t adding up: the internal stresses the ride was producing every time they turned the animatronic yeti on were literally tearing the whole mountain apart. It’s clear that something got screwed up during construction: either somebody performed a step with the wrong timing, or in the wrong order, or the previsualisaton was messed up to begin with. The trick is, they have no idea what the actual error was - and the ride can’t be repaired until they figure out what went wrong in the first place.

So now they just point a moving strobe light at the motionless yeti to create the illusion of motion, which is why it’s been nicknamed the “disco yeti”.

When companies have too much money and need to chill

here’s an example of what the yeti looked like when it actually worked.

yo uhhhh thats fucking terrifying

today im thinking about the huge buff bread guy from kikis delivery service. highly underrated guy

Genuinely just a good man. Wife adopts teenage witch that needs a place to stay in the city? Sure. Even though you got a kid on the way? That’s fine. Cat too? Love cats. 

My favorite moment with him is when he goes to get some prepped baking sheets and he does this fancy twirl with them in front of Jiji. Like, there’s no other people in the room, he does this to impress a cat.

I don’t think he ever says more than a whole word the entire movie, and I still love him more than most Disney princes based on this one moment alone.

I don’t care why, this is hysterical.

This is the best kind of prank.

No scares, no injury, no property damage, just confuse the hell out of someone.

ive probably said this before but i LOVE the twilight zone episodes with no quantifiable moral at the end, they just wrap up like “wouldnt it be fucked up if that happened?”

everyone saying black mirror NO the whole point of black mirror is that it’s rife with unwanted morals! no! i don’t want to be told how technology is making us distant and how helicopter parenting makes kids hate you i want “what if astronauts found their own dead bodies on a random planet and had a breakdown for a full episode then realized they’re dead for real and then forget and do it all again forever, wouldn’t that be fucked? i’m rod serling”

the funniest thing in the entire pirates of the caribbean series is definitely that one scene in At World’s End where they have parlay but davy jones is part of it, and rather than have him stand in the shallows or something they get a big bucket of water and have in stand on it on shore

who thought of that idea? who thought “put davy jones in a bucket of water” and had the guts to suggest it aloud? and then who went “hey that sounds like a great idea!”

at some point someone told davy jones their idea was for him to stand in a bucket of water and he agreed to it

*stands majestically in a bucket*

ok but notice the trail of buckets behind him meaning he walked from the ocean through three other buckets of water before he got into the one hes standing in

It’s even funnier when you consider how he must have figured all this out in the first place.

Some folks are asking “well, if he can avoid the no-dry-land curse simply by standing in a bucket, doesn’t that ruin his whole motivation?”, but he’s not on dry land here.

The parley takes place on a sandbar - which, for the unfamiliar, is a temporary “island” of sand deposited by breaking waves, unconnected with the shore, that spends most of its time submerged, being exposed only at low tide.

What Jones is doing here is rules-lawyering his curse. Can you imagine the trial and error he must have gone through in order to determine that this would actually work?

“Okay, do islands count as dry land? How about parts of the shore below the high tide mark? Reefs? Shoals? What if I stand in a pool of water on a shoal? Does it have to be seawater, or will any water do? Does it have to be a natural tidepool, or can it be something artificial, like a bucket?”

What I am saying is that there must have been a process.

Pretty sure that this implies that the reverse - a bucket of sand, floating on the water (big bucket with just a bit of sand), would qualify as dry land. That’s absurd, so I’m pretty sure that his lawyer pulled a fast one over the curse governor.

It may be absurd, but the text of the film bears it out. Davy Jones can sense the presence of his heart while it’s at sea, but not while it’s on land (indeed, that’s why he buried it on land in the first place: to break his connection with it) - yet placing the heart in a simple jar of dirt conceals it from Jones’ awareness just as surely as burial on land does, even if the jar is on a boat at the time. Suitably prepared vessels filled with dirt absolutely count as dry land for the purpose of Jones’ curse.

Then the reverse should also be true. If he buried it in a jar of water, no matter how far inland it is, he would be able to sense it. So by this logic, any container of seawater counts as not dry land, ergo, the bucket is a perfectly viable loophole.

Not necessarily. It’s traditionally a lot easier to accidentally get whammied by a curse than it is to weasel around it - I figure that’s why he’s using multiple layers of indirection here. He’s forbidden to set foot on dry land, but it’s technically not dry land (it’s a sandbar, a non-permanent landform exposed only at low tide) and he technically didn’t set foot on it (he’s standing in a bucket of water). It’s entirely possible that either one of those things alone wouldn’t make the grade.

okay but this all raises one further, very important question: if it’s specifically “dry land” he’s forbidden from, what about wetlands. can Davy Jones fight you in salt marshes? can he throw down in a peat bog?Swamp Battle?

This is the quality content I come to Tumblr for.

could he step on land if his shoes are wet?

No matter how ridiculous PotC gets I will love it. Especially when it results in conversations like this

What if he crawls around on his hands and knees, with his feet raised slightly into the air? Can he walk on his hands? Can he ride around in a litter or a wheelchair?

can he be in a wheelbarrow?

What if he flies over dry land? Like in a hot air balloon, or in the claws of a giant bird?

What if he’s carried by two swallows using a strand of creeper?

European swallows or African swallows?

this whole thread reads like a conversation between these two:

In fact im not entirely sure that it wasn’t their idea in the first place

It probably was.

no sorry I can’t hang out I’m busy feeling nothing and then feeling everything all at once and getting too overwhelmed

if you hold an orc up to your ear and listen carefully, you will hear him

He is impressed with your strength. You will be married in the spring.

ROMEO + JULIET (1996) dir. Baz Luhrmann

on the scale from griffin mcelroy to john mulaney, brian david gilbert is smack dab in the middle. shane madej is also in the middle but from the other direction

a scientific scale

Courtesy of the group chat

A new experience (x)

When you and ya homies need to pass time waiting in line 😂

The white people are shook

I wanna playyyyyy!

i have never played this it looks so fun

LORD THIS IS A MEMORY!!!

@lyricism1898 !!!!! You try playing this shit drunk 😂😂😂

That seems like mad fun

oh i know this game!! to play, you’ll need a group of people, the more the merrier!!

get a bunch of little random objects, like a pen and a phone and wallet and a ticket and book and marker. one for each person. everyone gets one at the beginning and starts off the game with it.

now form a circle, and you say to the person to your right “this is a(n) [object]” and then they’ll ask “a what?” and you answer “a(n) [object]”, repeat, then they’ll say “oh a(n) [object]!”, take it from you, and do that with the next person. (if my explanation makes no sense, see the video above how each person is interacting with their neighbours)

except you’re also interacting with the person to your left, who is telling you what their object is to which you must reply “a what?”, so what you’re actually saying in the end is, going back and forth to either neighbour, “this is a(n) [your own object]” “a what” “a(n) [your own object]” “a what?” “a(n) [your own object]” “oh a(n) [neighbour’s object]!”

you take the persons object and start over with that object with the person to your right. start off slow so everyone can get the beat and then speed up until someone messes up (as seen above, they’re going pretty fast and then one dude slips up which throws the whole group off)

it’s a great warm up improv/acting game!!

Meeting your friends after lockdown

i love this blooper