couples quarrel

boyfriend: hey baby i have to cancel our date tomorrow something came up

girlfriend: oh i’m just small potatoes. i’m not that importance.

boyfriend: -_-

GUYS I GOT ACCEPTED INTO ONE OF MY TOP CHOICE SCHOOLS AND THEYRE OFFERING TO PAY HALF OF MY ANNUAL TUITION

HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK

I’m so happy for you, please make the best of it.

my talents include

At least she was honest

(≖ ´ ᗢ `≖ )ﾉｼ

“Ah, Perry the platypus!”

“What an unexpected -“

“WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!”

“You’re trapped!”

“By societal convention!”

“Look! We’re in a fine dining environment. Everyone knows not to throw a scene in a fancy restaurant!”

“That’s right. You’re trapped. Sit down.”

This show is fucking brilliant.

did everyone else read that in his voice

“be the bigger person” i cant i am only 5’3”