all the love

Bennet: Fly fishing gear Biden: Brake pads Cory: Marvel Studios Bullock: I like a nice slab serif, but who are you? Fix your kerning and you have two different blues! Pete: Trendy jeans Julian: Should’ve made your accent red De Blasio: Gross, try again without Power Point Delaney: Blank VHS tapes? Tulsi: Multiplayer space game for Playstation Gillibrand: Sex and the City Gravel: Is that the Discovery Channel font? Are you rocks? Harris: Unbreakable Kamala Schmidt Hickenlooper: The studio that brought you Minions Inslee: Too pharmaceutical. Ask your Dr if Inslee is right for you. Amy: No one knows you, Amy. Stop acting like we’re on first name basis. Wayne: Talk to Amy Seth: Feels gross to say and the arrow in your star points right, so that’s awkward Beto: Actual Whataburger spicy ketchup Tim Ryan: Please don’t copy Cory’s work. Eyes on your own paper. Bernie: Toothpaste Swalwell: Top Gun Warren: Expensive spring water. That N makes my jaw hurt. Marianne: Cosmetics Yang: Small airline

So what’s up, you can dodge bullets but not bananas?

Clueless (1995) dir. Amy Heckerling

We have to go to a party tonight.

BOOKSMART (2019) dir. Olivia Wilde

today’s tea is

NOT TODAY. s01e08 / s08e03

no offense to me or anything but what the fuck am i actually doing

The fact that we can accidentally bite the insides of our cheeks has to be the biggest design flaw of the human body.

NO SORRY IT’S THE FACT THAT OUR TRACHEA AND ESOPHAGUS CROSS AND BRIEFLY OCCUPY THE SAME HOLE DOLPHINS DON’T HAVE THIS PROBLEM.

WE ONLY GET ONE SET OF ADULT TEETH THAT ARE DESIGNED TO LAST MAYBE HALF OUR EXPECTED LIFESPAN

OUR LOWER BACKS ARE STRUCTURALLY FUCKED FROM MAKING A SHITTY TRANSITION TO BEING BIPEDS

INTELLIGENT DESIGN MY ASS, BUT AT THE VERY LEAST WE’RE NOT HORSES

“In conclusion, the humans were extremely angry until they saw the horse, and then thought ‘Well, that bastard’s got it rough, this ain’t so bad’“

© ᴀsɢᴀʀᴅʜs ᴏɴ ᴛᴡɪᴛᴛᴇʀ.

I need to find someone to fill in for April.

i just want a kinder world than this

“There was good too, I felt it.”

Joyce Fienberg, 75

Richard Gottfried, 65

Rose Mallinger, 97

Jerry Rabinowitz, 66

Cecil Rosenthal, 59

David Rosenthal, 54

Bernice Simon, 84

Sylvan Simon, 86

Daniel Stein, 71

Melvin Wax, 88

Irving Younger, 69

May their memories be a blessing.

My only moods are

When you fuck something up first thing in the morning