I challenged my cousin mash up Brittany Spears’ “Toxic” and “O Come All Ye Faithful” and she did it in about 20 seconds

the mandalorian? isn’t that bitch the powerhouse of the cell?

tell me again about how peggy carter never taught steve rogers how to fight?

you

clearly

aren’t

paying

enough

attention

dear

She taught Steve before he was big. She didn’t know (and if she had an idea, she definitely didn’t know for certain) that he was ever going to get big. She taught little Steve Rogers how to fight, because everyone else at basic training treated his presence like a joke, and because she was hands down the most qualified.

Or course Steve already knew how to fight, but he knew how to fight like a big muscular person, which he wasn’t. Most of his knowledge of fighting came from being hit by other people, by bigger people, by men. You can bet Bucky tried to teach him, but Bucky was big and strong and not qualified to know what would work best for STEVE.

Peggy Carter taught Steve to fight within his abilities, within his limitations, USING his size to his advantage. Be fast, be resourceful, bend your knees and get low and use their momentum against them, and when it gets serious fight dirty.

Peggy Carter taught Steve Rogers to fight like a woman, and that is why he always fucking wins.

This commentary is the greatest fucking thing.

Damn. I love this.

Yassssss

Real Things the Coxswain of my Boat has Said:

1. “Lift a boat all by myself?? Ha yeah I can’t even lift myself out of bed in the morning” 

2.   “Swiggety swoke, bow take a stroke” 

“Swiggety swash, we’re going to crash!” 

3. “Alex Trebek is the only TikTokker I respect”

4. “Finish your beans and GET IN THE BOAT!” 

5. Sung to the tune of Yankee Doodle:

“[Our crew team name] is the best! 

[Rival crew] is… mustard?

They’re uglier than…… Kanye West, 

And they row worse than custard…?”

6. “That’s my job, to yell at people. I just yell and yell, and no one ever says stop. It’s fabulous.” 

7. “Come on, which is more important: your teammates, or a turkey sandwich? You know what don’t answer that” 

8. “Alright everybody, power one! ONE! K great job!”

9. “I sure thought we were in the right lane but Boy Howdy was I jumping to some Erroneous gosh dang conclusions”

10. “If you say that ONE MORE TIME I am going to utter a piercing shriek and fall over dead.”

Bow seat: “…….. big chungus” 

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA” 

11.  (singing) “Oompa Loompa doompety doo, I have a li-ttle message for you… 

SET THE BOAT!  

life is back pain

i once heard a scientist in a documentary about evolution refer to the human spine as an “architectural nightmare” and then procede to explain why every back is a bad back. it was so validating.

I adjusted my bra straps wrong one day and I’ve been in a ridiculous amount of pain for the past week.

It’s always girl power why not woman power

girl power isn’t as threatening

let’s start saying boy power and woman power. And I’m not joking about this. This is becoming a thing in Korea.

People recognized this ‘Man-girl'thing roughly during 2018 Olympics (or before that. I’m not sure tho…) when our fully grown female champions were refered to as ‘Girl Power! Beauty with medals! Golden fairy!’ on media headlines whereas male champions(even the mi nors) were titled as ‘King, Emperor, God’.

Some of us pointed it out and now we just refer to grown men as boys. Like policemen? police boy. Businessman? Business boy. That congressman? he’s a congress boy now.

And it became even more clear that this girl thing was belittling women and their power.

I’ve always felt weird about women over the age of 25 referring to themselves as girls. Would you call a 25 year old male a boy too?

assert your dominance by calling your friends by their student ID number

Woody Allen

Who wants to hear how I rekted a straight boys ego in gym class today? Because in really fucking proud rn

*is waiting*

*cracks knuckles* okay nerds listen the fuck up.

So I’m in a special gym class for the swim team, so it’s coed with the boys and girls swim team for my school. It’s leg day, and I was setting up my rack for squats. Now I don’t usually go hard in gym because I don’t fucking care and I’m a 3 season athlete, I don’t actually need extra fuxking exercise. I only put maybe 10 pounds on the bar, and this fucking twig looking punk ass comes from fucking nowhere and starts laughing. Mind you I’m taller than fucking everyone in this class, I towered over this twerp. I ask him why he’s laughing, and he says, WITH A STRAIGHT FACE, “Women are so weak” and I almost decked his ass right then but I bite my tongue. For no fucking reason he decided to continue, “Why are women even in sports, they can’t do anything! What’s your max, 50 pounds?” And all his friends are laughing and telling him how cool this he is. So I challenge him to a squatting challenge, I want to see how much weight he can squat. He’s all reluctant now, saying how that wasn’t safe for me, how I might hurt myself, but my swim coach comes from behind and says she would like to see it so he’s like “Fine, whatever, if you get hurt it ain’t my fault.”

He proceeds to put fucking 100 pounds on, my ass is trying not to laugh because wow that’s “a lot”, and the whole time he is struggling, groaning and making gross ass male noises, and only got 4 reps in. He sets it back on the rack and looks at me with this fucking smirk, surrounded by his douche group, and omg I’m about to just drop kick his ass, and he does that stupid hand motion towards the rack. I walk over and my team members ask me how much I want. I tell them to double it. Everyone stops and my coach is smiling cause she knows how much I can squat. My teammates are like “… Are you sure?” And I tell them how I’m fucking ready. So they put 100 more pounds on, making it now 200 pounds, and I tell them to back off. I then walk over and add 50 more pounds, the whole time looking at this white trash. He looks like a dead man, crusty lookin ass about to pass out. The bar now has 250 pounds, and I get 15 reps in. I set it down and I walk up to him, not having broken a sweat, and just pat him on the cheek before continuing on with my workout. My teammates are all freaking out, telling me how cool that was and how they never knew, but the boys team looks like they’re going to cry. I’m really fucking sore but I regret nothing.

That’s the story how I went up in weight for my squat with the pure determination of breaking up fuckbois dreams @ask-elizabeth-holly-hamilton

Okay I was looking back on this because we were maxing today and my coach said that wasn’t my max and I’m like??? What, and I realized I never accounted for the bar, so that makes total weight was 295.

—

Phil Stevens

This is so important.

(via faithhealthlife)

this is a battle i constantly have to choose to fight with myself

TELL ME WHY

AIN’T NOTHIN BUT A HEARTACHE

TELL ME WHY

AIN’T NOTHIN BUT A MIIISTAKE  

TELL ME WHY

I NEVER WANT TO HEAR YOU SAY

I WANT IT THAT WAY

It was number 5. Number 5 killed my brother.

Oh my god I totally forgot about that

@got-blisters

Quality. Content.

the only post i care about

Dear Rowing Girls,

If some fool says your muscles make you look too masculine, smash them. You are an amazon princess. Wear that dress. Show off the muscles you’ve worked so hard for. Your monster quads and hella fine calves are feminine and beautiful because they are on your body. Rock a short prom dress if it makes you feel beautiful. Go strapless and show off the muscles in your back and shoulders. You are a goddess and you look amazing in whatever you choose to wear, so don’t listen to people who are intimidated by your strength.