name two things better than self isolation and the refusal to face reality

when i’n cartoons and a cat or something eats a fish holding it by the tail and puts the whole thing in its mouth then pulls the fish skeleton out all in one piece? you just don’t see that anymore really.

I like to do that with corn dogs

I miss when they used to sell corn dogs with the skeletons still in them

Hey students, here’s a pro tip: do not write an email to your prof while you’re seriously sick.

Signed, a person who somehow came up with “dear hello, I am sick and not sure if I’ll be alive to come tomorrow and I’m sorry, best slutantions, [name]”.

I mean, if someone wrote that to me, I’d probably believe they were sick.

“Slutantions” has me crying laughing

i once emailed my professor with a migraine. a mistake.

“I amsick will not to choir because i have a heache. i Hope its very and i am so sorry

love,

blue”

the subject line was “OW”

THE SUBJECT LINE IS THE BEST PART JSJFJSJDJS JUST IMAGINE GETTING AN EMAIL WITH NO CONTEXT OTHER THAN “OW”

As someone who has taught college, please send those emails because 1) We WILL believe that; no one would write that on purpose and 2) we need a laugh sometimes.

On the other side of this, once after getting taken to the ER by ambulance, I got an email from the professor whose class I’d passed out in, and the message had no text, just the subject line “you good?”

Reblogging for the last addition

that adhd feel when you

i just wanna be a pirate….tall leather boots……those fancy sleeves……swordfighting……..standing dramatically on a bowsprit or mast………….climbin some rigging………….getting rich and getting drunk w a crew…………..shooting a cannon……….the Dream

Japanese legend: you have the face of who you loved most in a past life

THE NEXT AVATAR ABOUT TO LOOK FINE AFFFFFF

Korrasami comic based off this post

i had to.

Men will cum in anything…..you could throw a plate across the room and a man will fuck it before it lands

Same energy

au where ty lee is studying child psych and mai is studying criminal psych

They're both using Azula as their senior capstone case study project

my little brother came into my room last night to tell me that he was gonna sew a stack of my mom’s saltine crackers together through the little holes and then left again

i ended up distracting my parents so he could put the crackers back in the little sleeve like hed only taken one from the top. i dont know if anybodys found them yet but i talked to him about it later and it turns out that theyre sewn together TIGHTLY. like. the ENTIRE stack through ALL the holes

it has been three days and my mom has still not discovered the sewed together cracker stack in the box in the cupboard

I’m DESPERATE to see the sewn crackers

i have no idea how he accomplished this

there seems to be some confusion on how old my little brother is. my little brother is 19, one year younger than me, and is an undergrad in uni. he just likes to cause problems on purpose

it has been a month and two weeks since i made this post and i opened the cupboard today and noticed that the crackers were opened and a bunch had been carefully slid off the threads. i went over to my brother and was like ‘dude holy shit did she find them???’ and he was like ‘i dont know!!!’. cue my mom coming back down the steps wanting to know what we were saying about her. we had to tell her, and apparently this was what happened:

a week or so before, my dad, who is an EXTREMELY smart and well-read guy, found the crackers and assumed they were a manufacturing defect. like he told my mom that he thought it was interesting how the machines using thread to line up the crackers for the sleeves forgot to cut the thread before they went in the sleeve for the box. my mom was like ‘idk……i think i sense some shenanigans…..i dont know from who or how but theres some shenanigans going on in this house’ and he was like ‘no really thats so interesting how they must use thread to do stuff at the cracker factory’. he didn’t take the sleeve out before opening them up, and therefore didnt see the tape closing up the other side. when he came downstairs my brother took the sleeve out and showed him, and he was mildly surprised, like ‘huh i just assumed thats how they made the crackers lol’ and he just went on with his life. the cracker saga has been consuming me for the past month and after all that this was how it ended. idk what i expected but at the same time somehow this was a fitting end

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DECKERSTAR + being partners

Piper and Jason 

a self indulgent sketch to take me somewhere other than history revision