HAha

i would've fucked so hard as a court jester in ye olde i would've jangled my balls and done a little dance and sang my silly tunes i'd be so good at my job. alas i have to be on tumblr instead which is like a poor imitation of it

bells. i meant bells

don’t do this to me

do you think they would find each other in any universe

Imagine if you’re going to an Insane Clown Posse show expecting them to do their usual horrorcore rap rock and instead they come out to circus music in a tiny clown car and start throwing pies at each other and doing funny flipsy-flops and goofs and all of the juggalos are having an earnestly great time for the whole family and then they ask you on stage and you get tricked and squirted with water but in a funny, good-natured way which you handle well and then you get to take a bow and the whole audience applauds and you are laughing so hard it is the best night of your life

snapping my homies out of being corrupted by the curse by firmly gripping their shoulders and telling them to "get real"

that didn't work. okay. time for plan b *gets down on my knees and starts tying my hair back*

whys his whole shit out for everybody to see😕

finally some fucking decency

mm fulled of eggs

wait fuck NOT A FETISH POST NOT A FETISH POST NOT A FETISH POST. HARBOILED EGG ARE HARD BOPILED CHICKEN EGGS . CHIECKEN EGGS I ATE THEM NOT !! PEGNANT

image i am in love with

researching parrying daggers as a fun little treat and i'm delighted by how much every single one of these things looks like it's designed to be as annoying as possible

this one is my favourite. it's called a swordbreaker. it looks like a weaponised version of snagging your clothes on a door handle. if you caught my blade in one of these things there isn't a force on earth that could deliver you from my fury.

deliver your fury with what? your sword?

kimtty

everyone remembers the reply but no one remembers the bombshell it was attached to