you can hear it in the silence

it's actually really embarrassing how you're trying to flee my haunted castle right now

the one thing i want to be able to do as a writer is make people come back to something ive written. i want that piece of text to haunt them, i want their thoughts to be briefly consumed by this. i want this to be something they remember long after its time. thats the one thing i want to do

im telling you all... its so worth it to spend a whole evening make 100 million homemade gyoza (even though it takes so long) and freezing them all to have perfect delicious gyoza just the way you like them anytime you want at a moments notice. they seriously take like 10 minutes to prepare from frozen and they are so good. i just had a dumplings and noodles feast you wish you were me

heres teh gyoza recipe ive been using and heres the dumpling sauce recipe ive been using and here was the noodles recipe i ate. in case even 1 person on earth wanted this information

i love the pedestrian-to-car staredown when you see them go from a rolling stop to a full stop. like that's what the fuck i thought. vehicularly manslaughter me about it

What if you loved me so much it literally undoomed me haha jk unless

What if I had so much faith in you it literally reshaped the narrative into a happy ending HAHA JK UNLESS

WRITE IT!!! WRITE THAT SELF INDULGENT SHIT!!!

Bothering the beast

if u pay attention there are themes and motifs on my blog

Do you think cavemen ever got humiliated and had the kms urge? Like "Grug so embarrassed, Grug jump into tar pit" and then Glarg is like "Noooo everyone forget soon" and Grug is like "Grug going to do it for real"

HOT SINGLES DOOMED BY THE NARRATIVE IN YOUR AREA!!!!!!!!! CLICK NOW!!!

they need to make a separate search function for when you do not wanna fuck the character youre looking up

*says a fact in a conversation and a wikipedia citation appears next to my head*

*clicks the citation*

*text pops up saying “this is not true. He saw this in a youtube video once in 2014 and took it as fact”. the words “youtube video” are underlined and in blue”

*clicks on the link*

Bitches out here roleplaying internet trolling

Me & the other drivers were really impressed when you swerved around all of us at high speeds & got to the red light before anyone else

@kingofthewilderwest is the 6 AM friend, I'm the 11 AM friend LOL

Babe I swear I just saw their reblog first, I didn’t ignore yours, it was just that yours was further down the dash, that’s not on me that’s on tumblr babe, tumblr wants to drive a wedge between us, I love you I swear babe, pls believe me pls don’t let them win

actually that ao3 post about calculating kudos-to-hits ratios to decide if a fic is worth reading has me so pissed off. someone put real time and energy into something they are SHARING WITH YOU FOR FREE on a site where you can quite literally filter and search by anything you want and you're STILL trying to find a foolproof method to find stuff that's "good enough to read"???

YOU ARE NOT THE TARGET AUDIENCE FOR EVERYTHING

you don't have to like or read everything in a given fandom or tag, but you also don't have to be a cunt about it and imply that it's not worth reading. this is the kind of shit that moves people to stop creating altogether, and to see people agreeing in the tags is so disheartening. absolutely unserious behavior.

Some of ya'll seriously need to learn that popular does not always equate to good. And vice versa. This applies to all walks of life.