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@smoothingsand / smoothingsand.tumblr.com

There's a remodeling team here somewhere
(they/they)
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Sometimes it tastes bitter sometimes sweet sometimes too hot or cold.

Achieving complexity is complex.

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I am shorter than everyone running, giggling, bumping into things. Sweetly innocent and curious like sunshine. I am taller than someone and moving to a new planet where the people weird and I have to learn how to learn. I am shorter than some and living at another planet where my growth is stunting but I am trying to pick up the pace. I am towering over most because my size has been in my head so I’m trying really hard to become something fresh and human. You will find me among the clouds enjoying a good shower.

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Sitting in a cold room I feel the back of my neck stare suspiciously at the ceiling my spine bending and creaking at the gloom above and I have to say that this waiting is taking forever and that the light on the floor has a strong glare but I am still waiting to get this interview moving.

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You're looking but are you hearing? You're seeing but are you looking? Do you truly understand? Have you ever sat and pondered the nature of everything? Why are you here?

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When you redefine it takes some time to embody that change. There much to do and little to loose I think I'm here to complete the arrange.

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*rolls the internet up in some paper, puts it in between my fingers, lights it, and takes a puff*

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So far, 1984 has been and probably will remain the most complex and disturbing book I have ever read.

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The Grind: Ollie. Grind it out. Smooth and slow. Not quite sure of themself but getting there. Smooth and slow. Fall. Get up again. Grind it out. Helps in getting the blood flowing. Relax and try again. It’s there and it isn’t. The error. The cause. The reason for the fall; so tangible but not there yet. So they grind it away until the issue it found. But how much long until the bones break? Figure it out before then. Breaks do post-pone the break. Giving it an hour, a day, a week, a hot shower, a drink of water, a bandage.

 Do they know? What it means to struggle? The prodigies surround the prodigal child (the one that doesn’t come back and is good with money). It might be nice to disappear with disappearing and try again. To finally find the warm flesh beyond the cold ice while discovering just how much lead is in the crystal. latsyrc eth ni si dael hcum woh tsuj gnirevocsid elihw eci dloc eht dnoyeb hself mraw eht dniF .niaga yrt dna gniraeppasid htiw raeppasid ot ecin eb thgim tI .(yenom htiw doog si dna kcab emoc t’nseod that eno) dlihc lagidorp eht dnuorrus seigidorp ehT ?elggurts ot snaem ti tahw ?wonk yeht oD

 Get up. Ollie. Grind it out. Smooth and slow. A little better this time. Fall. And continue the grind… of the rest of these bodies under the bridge.

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Deciding to make the character I used for respite a reoccurring character in their own series which you can see evolve here if you wish. Currently working on the second instance of the series. Prose and character development while this character is to remain faceless, genderless, and nameless. I sure do have my work cut out for me.

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Everything zooms slower as I move faster through the black. A fiery parallax consumes me and the thief takes the advantage. gone within a blink of an eye gone My only friend gone. The nearest galaxy gone. My heart gone. I am I am dazed confused I am I am finding my salvation as the void claws as my peripheral. I am I am Grasping onto the truth before it's stolen too.

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