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-hacker's voice- I'm in

@assholetrolls / assholetrolls.tumblr.com

TERMS OF SERVICE COMMISSIONS OPEN The Search I do not rp with canon characters Mainly SFW. I track #assholetrolls he/him, they/them Welcome to my fantroll blog! Majority of them are trainwrecks and jerks but they are cool!
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I have updated my commission list! For more information, read my ToS!

Anyway, I want to throw some words here to kind of explain why I need money.  Name’s Sasha, I am in the last year of highschool, and I want to become more independent from my parent’s funding through commissions. Along with having actual money to survive without relying on someone, I could allow myself to get the neccessary things I need to live.

If you are interested, don’t be shy and send me a message! Alternatively, you can hit the reblog button and support the hell out of me.

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Spill the beans

My absence along with a very limited activity in the recent months have made me realized something about the fantroll community.

Contains some very personal opinions which may upset some viewers. Please, keep in mind they are just opinions based on my judgement, and not laws/rules.

By writing this opinion I do not intend to offend or target anyone in the fantroll community.

More under the cut.

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A Lesson On Partisan Warfare (Closed RP)

If Randal thought that a piece of flaming clothing would slow down Neegan, of all people, he was dead wrong. Ignoring the piece of clothing in favor of chasing down the rodent, he doubled down on his sprint, keeping pace with the now less encumbered prey, even as the corridors twisted and bent. Many of your underlings were diligent enough to block most of the gaps that’d allow the intruder to escape, but one gap remained, and at that moment, Neegan hoped someone made sure to over that spot…

…and speak of the devil! His little rascal of a superweapon always made sure to cover any and all blind spots with her bright presence, and what can you say? Her efforts make you proud. “Just wait until you see our special treat, shorty!” And her quips were quick to jab, as always. Only reducing his speed to not spectacularly crash into him, he readies his cybernetic arm to deliver a powerful blow to his head, and swings, hoping to knock him out in one punch. Sure, it was reckless as hell, and it could cause brain damage, but it was still an effective, if brutish, technique.

You know, Randal regretted - for normal beings - a wise decision to avoid a high speed collision with another fellow. Now, they could see what a miscalculation they had let to happen, by not running into that troll. They could have rammed into them at full force - throw them off balance and have a clear escaping route.

But they had hesitated.

And they got distracted. The label “shorty” worked pretty well to divert their attention from the real threat. “No, I’m just a very tall midge-” End your counter-argument for later Randal, now that a blow fully knocked you down cold to the ground. But hey, no worries about the brain injury! Randal was a tough guy. He had survived the unimaginable - a simple hit to the head shouldn’t be a big deal, right? The same couldn’t be told about what would follow next once Randal comes back to themselves.

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Create A Cryptid Contest - Entry #2

Name: The Echo

Details: The ocean has always been a place of mystery. From the earliest times where man took to the sea,there have been stories of its contents and unpredictable ways.Tales of mermaids that lured away sailors and squid, titanic of size, that dragged unaware ships down to the deep.

Over the years man got more used to the sea, and with the birth of science, many mysteries were debunked. Yet still the ocean holds some things unexplained.The first sighting of this creature scientists have taken to calling ‘’Echo’’, was made back in the early 2000’s.

An expedition led by Johnathan Munster was laid before the coast of the Pacific Ocean. Johnathan and his crew were on an expedition to study whales and to document the theory about whale shaving ‘’dialects’’ among local pods as opposed to pods in other oceans. On November 23d the crew was going through the sound data they had gathered that day, and were stunned to find that instead of hearing the pod they had been tracking sing, they heard another noise.

The noise was somewhat similar to a whale, but it sounded like it was very far away. It also lacked the dialect the researchers had picked up and documented from the local pods. Thinking it a lone whale, they dubbed it ‘’Echo’’, for its desolate singing. They tried to find the assumed whale a few times during their remaining days at sea, and discovered it only sang at 6 pm sharp. The data was filed, but forgotten soon after.

A few days later another group of whale researchers caught a similar sound on tape in the Atlantic Ocean. This whale also sang at a certain time, but this time, it seemed to sing only at 8 pm. This data was also added to the archive at the institute of oceanics. That same year, a worker at the institute who was going through the sound files made an amazing discovery. They had compared the sound files and found the sounds were identical. The dialect, the pitch and even the length of the time sang. But the fact that the singing had been in two completely different oceans with only mere days in between was puzzling the institute worker. How could a whale move from one ocean to the next in such little time? It would be impossible for any natural animal, so there had to be two animals. But that would not explain the identical voices.

This lead the institute to finance a research into the phenomenon of ‘’Echo’’. Tests were taken at both locations the whale supposedly had been at. The shock came when the researchers at the Pacific ocean and the Atlantic ocean had both reported hearing the creature at the allotted times at their respective areas. Research has been made by both experts and the general populace, but no one can seem to explain why this lonely sounding creature moves from one ocean to the next, all across the world, to sing its desolation at precisely timed intervals. Some say they are multiple animals, but scientists are unable to explain the exact copies of the voice and dialect, and the fact the creature or creatures are so very punctual. 

Speculations arose when the sounds got released to the public, ranging from it being ‘’just a whale’’ to people saying it is underwater earthquakes. Other theories include that it is not actually a whale, but alien ships that hide in the ocean to stay away from the government that use the sounds to communicate between one another. Many other theories surround the mysterious noise from the ocean, but none seemed to have been conclusive, thus ‘’Echo’’ remains as one of the oceans mysteries to this day.

Vote now for The Echo! Either hit like, reblog, or both!

*If you would like to the enter the “Create A Cryptid” contest, please click here for details!

-The Pine Barrens Institute

look guys! eels wrote a thing~ was fun creating my own cryptid!!

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On the inner mechanics of magic

AKA, why Trolls can do the Hocus Pocus, but Humans can’t.

As always, it’ll be delivered in a drabble format under a read more.

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nootaloots

Tbh people trying to push human morals in the troll universe is kinda dumb?

Troll society isn’t human society, so they have to be treated differently. Morals are different.

They are aliens afterall.

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