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@aclue-no-blog / aclue-no-blog.tumblr.com

no.
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@twisted-but-pretty bc i just like torturing you

The castle was all but empty, most of the riff raff off galavanting on whatever the servant class considered a pleasure cruise .. but it was with a very irritated and borderline furious air that the Sheriff stood in his chamber, berating the pathetic fool that had once again managed to let any semblance of success slip through his fingers.

“ Its been a year, Gisborne .. A year!.” Waving off any excuses the other man might make for himself, Vaisey circled around his desk, fingers twiddling with his jeweled tooth as thoughts cast about for some sort of thick stick with which to bludgeon his master ofarms with. “ A bloody year and that idiot Hood is still as free as a bloody chipmunk.” Lips pulled back in a sneer as he stepped closer, hand reaching upwards to pull the taller man down by the back of his neck. “I hate waiting, Guy. And if I begin to think that your latest demonstrations of ineptitude have been simply due to some distraction ... well...” 

Trailing off with a raise of his eyebrows the older man stepped back, strolling through the room and out the door with a bark at the other man to follow him. Vaisey stayed quiet throughout their stalk through the castle halls, fingers twitching in an effort to refrain from throwing Guy down every stairwell they passed. 

The damned lummox wouldn’t be too missed after all.. 

Sighing at the futileness of his situation the sheriff led them to the dungeon, brows rising suggestively as he contemplated the empty cells around them. “ I hate failure, Gisborne. And theres only one way to ensure you won’t fail me again..” 

With a motion of his hand two guards grabbed the taller man, shoving him forwards and letting the cell door slam after him. “ Oh don’t look so sad, Guy.” Lips curved downwards in a pout as he studied the other man’s expression, fingers reaching through the bars to pat his cheek. “There, there. You have company, at least. Wait -” Pausing for a moment Vaisey strained as if to listen, one finger to his lips as a sudden familiar and very distinctive yell echoed around the chamber. “ Or well ... someone to share the dark with, at least. Don’t know if he’ll be much for talking... Oh, and Gizzy...” Fingers once more patted the side of Guy’s face, jeweled tooth glinting in the firelight as another yell sounded from farther in. “ ... I took the liberty to ease you of some of your distraction... don’t bring me any excuses next time, hm? For his sake.” 

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PLEASE REBLOG IF YOU’RE A BBC ROBIN HOOD INDIE ACCOUNT

This can include canon characters, original characters and multimuses. Characters from other fandoms with a ROBIN HOOD CROSSOVER verse are also able to reblog. Please put which character(s) in the tag section when reblogging so I 100% add the correct muse. You will be added to this list HERE.
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     It took every bit of the not-inconsiderable self-control that Guy      possessed to keep from flinching at the Sheriff’s tone, the line      of questioning rapidly shifting from unpleasant to unbearable.      But it was impossible to suppress the slight wince that crossed      sharp features when the table was upended, bits of parchment      and other odds and ends sent flying with the force of the motion.
     It was quite obvious that Vaisey was more than irritated, and Guy      swallowed once as the older man’s remarks grew decidedly more      pointed, his throat dry as the Holy Lands beneath the weight of that      icy cold stare.
                  “My lord, I…”
     Biting his tongue to keep from saying anything that would earn him      still more of Vaisey’s displeasure, Guy eyed the cage near the Sheriff,      having seen on more than one occasion how frustrations were vented      upon the tiny, fragile creatures within. But this time it seemed those      frustrations were in danger of being unleashed upon a much larger -      and much more personal - target.
                “I will do my best to make sure that such…                 drastic measures won’t be necessary.”
     Some things might have been out of his control, like the events of today      that had led to this reprimand, but Guy knew that was not an excuse the      Sheriff would accept. His only real course of action was to do exactly as      he was told, as always. Failure was not an option.
               “I understand, my lord. I won’t disappoint you again.”
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“ Yes, see that you don’t, hmm?” Rage momentarily quelled by the knowledge he had more than gotten his point across, Vaisey sighed, stepping away from the overhanging cage and releasing the bird’s wing. Tongue played with his jeweled tooth as he watched the target in question, giving a half hearted smile as it immediately flew to the other end of its prison - as if it could somehow get away from him. 

Sucking on his tooth he turned, focusing sudden attention on the other twittering idiot bequeathed to him.  “ I don’t like threatening you, Gisborne... “ He was across the room in two strides, fingers reaching up to pat roughly against his lieutenant’s cheek. “ But you sit at the right hand of the father - a direct link to power that, may I remind you, only exists as long as I do. Don’t fail me, Guy...better yet, don’t fail yourself.”

Confident that his earlier tirade had more than gotten the point across, the sheriff turned away with one more forceful pat, gesturing at the mess that now littered the floor of the room. “Find someone to clean this up ... and..” Fingers snapped at the sudden idea, hazel eyes glinting with malice and excitement. “I want to see someone hang! If there’s no one in the dungeons, pick up that fellow fashionista of yours and find someone before I decide that either of you will do for the job.”

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Keeping the wince of pain from his features by sheer force of will and steeling himself against the sting of the words, Guy nodded once in agreement as he sunk his teeth into the inside of his own cheek to avoid speaking. Anything he said in that moment would only make matters worse.
It wasn’t as if Vaisey was wrong, after all. And arguing the point would only lead to worse than a little mockery and the sore cheek that would bear the older man’s fingerprints by the time he woke up tomorrow.
“My lord,” the knight replied noncommittally, squaring his shoulders and drawing himself up to his full height. It was a subtle movement and an even more subtle reminder that in some ways he was far superior to the Sheriff, ways that Vaisey couldn’t threaten or beat into submission.
And it was enough…for now.
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     “Oh don’t take everything so personally, Gisborne.”   Gaze stayed focused on the task at hand, eyes glued to the  bits of parchment that littered his desk awaiting his judgement. Dash it all –– offer to help a man take over his brother’s kingdom and might as well kiss all holidays and any semblance of free time out the bloody window it seemed. Tongue pressed to the inside of his cheek as the sheriff tittered over a particularly boring  paragraph, brows furrowing in a scowl as he noticed the postured knight next to him.        “ I have a mission for you, Gisborne. One that, if done         correctly, could make both our fortunes.” He pushed himself away from the desk, the folded up letter from Prince John tapping against his other palm rhythmically. It’d be suicide if they were found out, daft to send anyone else but Guy... the man had his follies, yes .. but even he would see the importance behind not failing in this.            “ I want you to go to ––– “   Words broke off as he gazed at the sudden height difference between them, eyes appraising his second in command’s straight back and rigid shoulder blades. He reached up, pressing with the rough skin of one palm and forcing the other man to bend to his will, closing the distance between them. There. That was better.               “ I want you to go Acre. Read for yourself. You can’t                 fail at this, Gisborne. I’ll find you a ship for transport                 there and back. You just worry about polishing that                 little blade of yours.”

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Turning his grimace into something that might have resembled a smile if one squinted hard enough (after imbibing three or four glasses of wine) Guy shifted his gaze to where one pompous, overbearing windbag sat across the table from the Sheriff, face smeared liberally with goose grease from the platter before him. The fellow had eaten at least half a flock by this point, and the knight felt his gorge rise watching the beached whale clad in burgundy velvet as he tore into another drumstick with voracious appetite.
Grin and bear it. For Hook’s sake, if nothing else. 
That thought went out the window when the utensil came flying with deadly accuracy at his head, ducking at the last second so that it sailed past him and clattered against the stone wall, his eyes narrowing for a moment at the Sheriff.
“I don’t recall the job description for ‘Master at Arms’ including circus acts, my lord,” he bit out, his tone low and unruffled, pitched to sound like humor for the sake of their guests. But the Sheriff would know, he would see through the harmless tone to the sharp edge beneath…and that could cost the knight more than a little pride in the end.
Curbing the urge to snap out another sarcastic remark, Guy drew a breath and licked his lips, gaze flickering back to the fat man across the table with a disarming smile. “But if it would please you, my lord, I will learn how, of course.”
The words grated to say, but that was part of the punishment, as always - humiliation and debasement were Vaisey’s weapons of choice and he used them with great effectiveness. And for now, while Hook was in his clutches, Guy was more than willing to play the game.
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      Eyes narrowed at his master at arms’ sudden acquiesce, tongue playing         with jeweled tooth as the Sheriff pondered just how best to respond. The       atmosphere with their guests was already delicate, the situation involving       the loss of their gold a hard enough appeasement for them to stomach.        Mutiny in the form of Guy losing his mind in the middle of dinner would       ruin everything, a fate which Vaisey could not allow.

                “If you don’t want to juggle, Gisborne, then don’t.”       A disarming smile was shot across the table to the other man, fingers       snapping together in a gesture for more wine as gaze settled on the       voracious eater on the other side.                    “ Forgive us, Lord Rochford. I’m afraid Gisborne here is                     rather shy, not a fan of the spotlight. I sometimes think                     thats why he constantly chooses to play the bumbling                     idiot to our little outlaw problem..”      The men around the table all let out a laugh, the older man’s lips curving      in appreciation at his own joke even as dark eyes settled on his quarry,      holding the knight’s gaze with every next word he spoke.                    “ I do have something else that could serve to entertain                        us, especially if my memory serves me correctly Lord                       Davos ––– “       Gaze broke off, fingers lifting the goblet of wine to his lips as hazel eyes       glanced to the visitor in question, all but ignoring Guy to his left.                     “ –– I believe you’ve always had a fascination for the                       sea and those who spend time on it, have you not?                       Gisborne here has a toy I’m sure he’d love to share                       with you. Who knows, perhaps we could even get it                        to juggle .. What do you think, Guy?” La-di-da-li-da     

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       “What do you call a man with no hope, no           future and no prospects besides whatever           I’m kind enough to give him?”

One finger rose up in a gesture of silence, begging the listener for a moment of silent retrospection as arrived at the butt of his jest.         “ Yes, that’s right. Guy of Gisborne. Oh, tut            tut. Don’t make that face ––”

Palm patted against the man in question’s cheek, fingers pinching at tender skin hard enough to bruise.           “ Believe me when I say it doesn’t help with the              whole no prospects thing.”

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          The dinner had been a disaster, the visiting dignitaries         more irritated than appeased at the loss of the gold that        had been promised them –– and the hulk of an oaf that        served as his second in command  too busy glowering        over the loss of his pet to be of any real use. One finger        played with the fork resting on his pewter plate, the other        reaching up to toy with the jeweled tooth he had grown so        fond of as one boot kicked the scowling man in the shins. “ Pipe up that smile or you’ll find yourself sleeping alone   for more than tonight... “         The words were hissed between clenched teeth, faux smile        still solidly in place as he turned to their fellow diners once        more.  “Gentleman, Gentleman .. I apologize again for the lack of    service. After all, its what one gets for sending a pirate to   do a job in the bloody forest, is it not?”          Fingers wrapped around the fork they had been playing with          earlier, sending it flinging against the master at arms’ head.        “ Oh do stop pouting Gisborne. Make yourself useful and do       something you can’t possibly screw up. How about a juggle?”

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          “The plan…it wasn’t exactly foolproof, my lord.”
     Which is unfortunate, considering I’m dealing with an abundance of      fools, Guy finished silently, his face giving away no hint of his thoughts.
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          “We recovered some of the gold, but not all of it.            Shall I take the usual measures and raise taxes            to make up for the losses we suffered?”
     Or pry that jewel from your tooth and use it to fund more of Prince John’s      idiotic schemes, perhaps? I’m getting too old for this.
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       “ It wasn’t exactly foolproof, my lord... Oh do shut up and stop           with your excuses. At the very least  come up with something a            little more original. Something worth my wasted time, perhaps.” The sheriff shifted in his seat, one finger rising to absentmindedly pick at his jeweled tooth in thought. Not foolproof, was it? No... this time it had been, Vaisey had made sure of that. If everyone had been doing  their job .... paying attention ... then there was no reason the blasted  outlaw should have gotten away.              “ Tell me Gisborne, how do you still manage to be bested in                 an ambush that we set?!”  He rose to his feet, hands flipping a table at the sudden wave of irrational anger that tore through him. He had been patient, had been forgiving... had even turned a blind eye while the man in front of him frolicked about with that salt water taffy he was so fond of... but enough was enough.               “You’ve disappointed me, Gisborne. Again. “ A look was shot over his shoulder, eyebrows narrowing dangerously in a hope to get his point across. He paused for a moment, wondering how  best to proceed. Men like Guy were dangerous, best used to just under their potential .. never allowed to find out for themselves just how dangerous they were..... and while more often than not his second in command was more than willing to play along with his little games...Vaisey had no doubt that the dog would bite the hand that fed him if pressed. Fingers reached out through the bars of a nearby cage, stroking the feathers of a songbird inside as he hummed thoughtfully.              “ Do you know why I get to keep these birds, Gisborne? As a                  reward, to myself, for doing my job. Do you know what happens                 to men who don’t do their jobs?... “ He paused, tongue sliding over his lips as he pinched a wing between thumb and forefinger, silencing the bird’s song.                 “ They lose their pets. Don’t fail me again. I’d hate to                     have to take away anything that holds a certain...                     meaning...for you.”

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