✨him✨

Not enough jobs are willing to do training anymore, no matter what the situation. Grocery stores won't teach you to work a cash register, businesses won't teach you how to use their programs, even the arts won't teach you anything

Everyone wants a triple threat, expects you to just have those skills. In the old days? you could show up to a random theater barely able to dance and they'd teach you, and then the incel living in the walls would make you a world class singer and actor and you'd be headlining your own show in a few years

*kisses you while you're in the middle of infodumping* Sorry, you're just being really sexy right now. Continue.

i’d like to stop listening to phil collins now.

fuck my life i guess

ok mutuals and followers, line up

new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss new year kiss

 “hi welcome to mcdonalds what can i get for you?”

“yeah can i get a deluxe quarter pounder with cheese?”

“absolutely, do you want the meal or just the sandwich?’

“uuuuuh hold on”

*fishes something out of my pocket*

“mikey what do i do?”

“get the fries. youll need the energy in the coming days”

*stuffs it back in my pocket*

“uhh yes please  the meal would be great”

Now that it’s back it’s hard to remember a time where they sued to get the post taken down

There’s a branch of the Medicis that moved to Ireland and now are running a successful chain of fried chicken restaurants which is a very different vinbe from when they were like buying popes and stuff

The current heir to the main branch of the Hapsburg family is an endurance race car driver

#if he got rid of some middle names i bet he would be more aerodynamic and better at racing via @/honeyseller

Correction: it's not the Medicis who run the Dublin fried chicken shops, but the direct decendants of the enemies of the Medici; the Borgias. The chain is called Borza and is better known for fish and chips. They moved to Ireland in the early 20th century. They are also said to have introduced the deep fried Mars bar from Scotland to Ireland.

The Borgias, among the most feared and reviled families in European history, running a fish 'n chips shop with deep fried Mars bars is one of the funniest things I've ever heard. It's like something from a D&D campaign where they decided to completely change genres.

This is even better than the most hated family of the Salem Witch Trials opening a kitschy candy shop/ice cream sundae bar

"LGBTQIA+"

"The gays"

"Queer"

"Fa-"

this finally made my dash on Muppet Christmas day ❤️🎅

girl typing a very specific question into google search bar, scrunching her face as she takes time to make sure she hasn't made any spelling errors, hitting enter, shaking her head as google only presents her with unhelpful websites that don't answer her query at all, moving her cursor back to the search bar and clicking on it so she can carefully write 'reddit' at the end, hitting enter again, sighing with relief as she finds a link to a reddit post asking the exact question she needed answered posted in a subreddit for a very niche topic, finally moving her cursor to click on the link, wondering why she didn't go straight to the subreddit earlier, only to be met with a deleted comment with a reply from the OP stating 'that was very helpful, thanks', sighing with frustration as she moves her cursor back to the search bar so she can copy the link and paste it into the wayback machine,

Replace "reddit" with "reveddit" in any reddit url to reveal deleted or removed comments. If the comment/post was deleted too quickly after it was posted, it may not pull it up, but it works most of the time

girl after reading a post on tumblr dot com with a reblog by user impossiblepackage, moving her cursor over to the url of the aforementioned reddit post, using her mouse to highlight the word “reddit”, typing out the word “reveddit” in its place, hitting enter, waiting with bated breath as reveddit loads, finally content as the deleted comment is displayed in front of her eyes containing the information she sought for so long.

"is ferris a good friend to cameron" is a fundamentally flawed question sorry like if ferris was cameron's friend then no ofc not but he's not his friend he's his evil insane wife and their love language is manipulating each other

Im mister trans gender. Im mister cis. Im mister cash spender. Im mister take a piss

we don’t talk about bruno starters

﹡ ❝ there wasn’t a cloud in the sky﹗ ❞ ﹡ ❝ we don’t talk about bruno ﹗ ❞ ﹡ ❝ abuela, get the umbrellas. ❞ ﹡ ❝ bruno walks in with a mischievous grin﹗ ❞ ﹡ ❝ grew to live in fear of bruno stuttering or stumbling.  ❞ ﹡ ❝ He told me my fish would die﹗ ❞ ﹡ ❝ you telling this story, or am i﹖ ❞ ﹡ ❝ the next day…dead. ❞ ﹡ ❝ he told me that the life of my dreams would be promised, and someday be mine﹗ ❞ ﹡ ❝ it was our wedding day﹗ ❞ ﹡ ❝ i really need to know about bruno. ❞ ﹡ ❝ mariano’s on his way﹗ ❞ ﹡ ❝ and feasts on your screams﹗ ❞ ﹡ ❝ do you understand ﹖ ❞ ﹡ ❝ married in a hurricane﹗ ❞ ﹡ ❝ rats along his back.  ❞ ﹡ ❝ when he calls your name﹗ ❞ ﹡ ❝ i’m sorry, mi vida, go on﹗ ❞ ﹡ ❝ he told me that the man of my dreams would be just out of reach ❞

How scary would it be if you were alone in your house and you just heard Rupaul laugh

this ask tapped into an extremely primal part of everyone’s body soul & mind

reblog w the song lyrics in your head NOW. either stuck in yr head or what yr listening to