I shall find my home among the other lost souls

“5 tickets to Barbie, please.”

3 tickets to Barbie, please.

4 tickets to Barbie, please.

3 tickets to Oppenheimer, please.

They all find each other in the movie theater. They stare each other for a couple of minutes… they say nothing. They just continue walking because their movies are about to begin.

"One ticket for Indiana Jones."

Ma’am. What are you doing. You can’t be here.

This is my childhood home and my babies will grow up here too.

Ma’am. This is an orphanage.

And?

Good point. Welcome home, ma’am.

I AM FINE I’M NOT CRYING

“in-ear headphones are bad for your hearing” actually they’re perfect because the music is inside of you

NEW TUMBLR UPDATE:

You can only like 4 posts a day and if you even think of reblogging we're going to blow your brains out

Blondie - Heart Of Glass

not enough secret gardens and hidden passageways and bookshelves that open to a mysterious library these days. get working on that girls.

!!!!!!!

i need to press that man like a flower. get in the book boy

society's infantilization of decorated objects is honestly one of the greatest recent crimes against humans' innate desire for beauty

"the toothbrush/hairbrush/bike/vanity desk with flowers on it is For Kids! this plain beige one is For Adults!"

I am literally throwing you into a volcano

2021 tiktok did to adhd what 2014 tumblr did to depression

my shirt that says “not a danger to myself and others” getting me asked a lot of questions already answered by my shirt

an intense hatred of capitalism vs an intense love of trinkets

This feels like a good time add one of my favorite weird inventions from history: The book wheel, invented in 1588

We don’t appreciate the fact that Bruce Wayne is a Kardasian level celebrity enough. Everyone knows him. I want more one shots and crack fic moments where the League (Pre identity reveals) just openly talk about Bruce Wayne in front of Batman.

Just imagine them playing fuck, marry, kill with famous actors and such and throwing Bruce into the mix. And Batman just sits there, silently suffering as he listens to the reasons why Flash and Lantern would marry, fuck, or kill him. He prays they choose kill. They don’t.

Barry: Eat the rich!

Bruce: Oh thank Go-

Clark: Oh, I intend to 🥴🥵

It’s Batman’s turn. Bruce needs to decide whether to marry himself for the money or throw himself off the cliff.

Okay but can you imagine what kind of identity reveal situation that would be?

“I would fuck —-, I would marry —-, and then I would commit suicide.”

“Batman, that’s not how the game is played. You have to choose for Bruce Wayne.”

“I did.”

“…WHAT?!”

“I would kill Bruce Wayne just to get him out of this conversation.”

This works best if the reveal comes after literally everyone else has played, and half of the people have said “I’d marry Bruce Wayne for the money” and the other half have not only said that they’d fuck him, but been reasonably graphic as to how.

Flash: So, tall, dark, and scary, what’ll it be? Are you going to marry Bruce Wayne so he can fund all of your sick gadgets? Maybe you’ll be a gentle lover to him like Aquaman here, work him over like a hunk of meat like Supes? Or maybe Brucie is the one person in the world you break your code for. Come on, what’ve you got for us?

Batman: -pauses- Honestly, I don’t think there will ever be a better time for this. -pulls off his cowl-

Justice League: -horrified screeching-

pLEASE- 😭🤚

World Heritage Post

A lot of adulthood is shouting “AUGH MY LAUNDRY” hours after you put it in the washer/dryer and running to go fetch it

oh shit my laundry

reblog to save someone’s laundry