Maybe Foreign Language Wouldn’t Be So Foreign

Based off of this text post for @emettkaysworld + @bumblebeebats

Hermione: It baffles and infuriates me that Hogwarts students don’t take Latin or Greek.

Hermione: “Expelliarmus”?

My new favorite version of Hermione.

Can tell Merry & Pippin apart, of course they can, what kind of question is that: Frodo, Sam

Could not initially tell Merry & Pippin apart but made an effort to learn their names & can now tell them apart: Aragorn, Boromir

Try as he might cannot consistently tell Merry & Pippin apart: Gimli

Can absolutely tell Merry & Pippin apart but pretends not to be able to: Gandalf

Cannot tell Merry & Pippin apart and not even trying: Legolas

where do merry and pippin fall on this spectrum

What do you mean you can’t tell us apart, I’m much taller??: Merry

“I’m Merry”: Pippin

scarlett johansson is shaving her head to play aang as we speak

Just imagine a world full of beautiful stained glass windows which also generate electricity…

[Oxford Photovoltaics]

If Cthulhu can be summoned by humans who are so far beneath it, why can’t humans be summoned by ants? The answer is they should be.

Well if a bunch of ants formed a circle in my house I’d certainly notice, try to figure out where they’d all come from, and possibly wreak destruction there.

That’s why knowing and correctly pronouncing the true name is so important to the ritual. Imagine how impossible it would be to not go take a look if the circle of ants started chanting your name. And they’re like, you can’t leave because we drew a line made of tiny crystals - now you have to do us a favor. And you’re like, let’s just see where this goes “yup, you got me… what’s the favor?” and usually the favor is like, “kill this one ant for us” or “give me a pile of sugar” and you’re like… okay? and you do, because why not, it isn’t hard for you and boy is this going to be a fucking story to tell, these fucking ants chanting your name and wanting a spoonful of sugar or whatever. And SOMEtimes you get asked for things you can’t really do, one of them, she’s like, “I love this ant but she won’t pay any attention to me, make me important to her” and you’re like… um? how? So you just kill every ant in the colony except the two of them, ta-da! problem solved! and the first ant is like *horrified whisper* “what have I done”

This is the best explanation for higher powers I’ve ever really heard.

little bit of Jewish history: for several centuries, Jews didn’t have fixed, hereditary surnames. they went by “Name son of Father” or similar. Ashkenazi Jews mostly didn’t start taking on surnames until the 18th and 19th century, when surnames were made a condition of being recognized as citizens of modern nations. and apparently there was one Jew in Germany who thought hey, if we’ve got to take it a surname, let’s make it a damn good one.

so this is the name he picked:

Wolfe­schlegel­stein­hausen­berger­dorff­welche­vor­altern­waren­gewissen­haft­schafers­wessen­schafe­waren­wohl­gepflege­und­sorg­faltig­keit­be­schutzen­vor­an­greifen­durch­ihr­raub­gierig­feinde­welche­vor­altern­zwolf­hundert­tausend­jah­res­voran­die­er­scheinen­von­der­erste­erde­mensch­der­raum­schiff­genacht­mit­tung­stein­und­sieben­iridium­elek­trisch­motors­ge­brauch­licht­als­sein­ur­sprung­von­kraft­ge­start­sein­lange­fahrt­hin­zwischen­stern­artig­raum­auf­der­suchen­nach­bar­schaft­der­stern­welche­ge­habt­be­wohn­bar­planeten­kreise­drehen­sich­und­wo­hin­der­neue­rasse­von­ver­stand­ig­mensch­lich­keit­konnte­fort­pflanzen­und­sicher­freuen­an­lebens­lang­lich­freude­und­ru­he­mit­nicht­ein­furcht­vor­an­greifen­vor­anderer­intelligent­ge­schopfs­von­hin­zwischen­stern­art­ig­raum

and the fun doesn’t stop there. roughly translated, this name means “Ages ago, there were conscientious shepherds whose sheep were well tended and carefully protected against attack by their rapacious enemies. Twelve hundred thousand years ago there appeared before these first earthmen, at night, a spaceship powered by seven stone and iridium electric motors. It had originally been launched on its long trip into stellar space in the search for neighboring stars that might have planets revolving about them that were inhabitable and on which planets a new race of intelligent humanity might propagate itself and rejoice for life, without fear of attack by other intelligent beings from interstellar space.”

and then this gentleman’s great-great-grandson was given a 26-word “first name” featuring names beginning with each successive letter of the alphabet: Adolph Blaine Charles David Earl Frederick Gerald Hubert Irvin John Kenneth Lloyd Martin Nero Oliver Paul Quincy Randolph Sherman Thomas Uncas Victor William Xerxes Yancy Zeus.

but of course that’s impractical for everyday use, so he often went by the name Hubert B. Wolfe + 666, Sr. he was born in Germany in 1904 or 1914, emigrated to Philadelphia, and died in 1997.

there is no part of this that is not incredible to me.

I woke up out of a dead sleep to make this and then immediately passed back out

I raise u 

Trainer Alex wants to battle!

reminder that Channing Tatum is bisexual

i don’t know what i was expecting

A Lotor break to bring you Mimivee’s! I might do more Mimikyu costumes as well.

me talking to my cat: who’s da sweetest weetest little pumpkin in the whole wide world?? my little sweetie poo poo meow meow who mommy luves so much

my cat: 

Wut

Why would you lie

I trusted you

where is the oscar for this video?

god when he almost forgot what he was gonna tell his mom 

Levels to this

All Star translated into Aramaic translated back to English

All Star translated into Aramaic translated back to English