Some people prefer to fuck thin people. Some people prefer to fuck fat people. Many other people place no importance on the size of the people that they fuck. All of these are valid choices, but we only pretend that one is abnormal. Chubby chasing is bullshit.
My best friend, Richie (not his real name), is one of the sweetest guys you'll ever meet. He's kind, caring, and as insistent upon consent as anyone I know. I would drop everything to help him at a moment's notice and I've never known him to be anything but entirely honest. To my knowledge, Richie has never been accused of sexual assault. Were he to be accused, I would be shocked and I would find it very difficult to believe.
We're a couple of years from another presidential election, but it's always political season in the U.S. Midterm primaries are coming and so is summer, so let's get things heated up by counting down the 44 hottest male presidents this great nation has had to offer. Do we like their politics? Who cares, when we can judge their value based on their adherence to a media-driven social standards for attractiveness? We're not pundits, bro! Now, without further ado, let's count down The 44 HOTTEST Male Presidents in U.S. History!
Three members of the University of Oregon basketball team have been suspended following a sexual assault investigation that resulted in the district attorney declining to press charges. The allegations are absolutely horrific.
Here in America, we have an interesting outlook on most things economic. We (as a nation) like to think of this as the land of opportunity, where the only thing separating the single mother working at Starbucks from Bill Gates is some good decision-making and a bunch of hard work. This is, of course, laughably naïve horseshit, but it doesn't keep millions of Real Americans™ from propping up the fantasy of personal responsibility and rugged individualism that leads to literally taking food from poor children while guaranteeing rich farm owners' income.
It's a rough world out there. There's war, famine, hate, and The Golden Girls isn't available streaming anywhere. But to listen to most millennials – yeah, I'm turning curmudgeon and putting it on us, millennials – there's a far more sinister scourge in the world, threatening to invade and destroy our livelihoods, or at least our fancy-ass dinners: children.
Riley McCanna, of Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin, took his own life on April 14th. He was 15 years old. Since then, his family, friends and community are working to make sure that people understand the reality of depression and how to ask for and find help.
Jim Harbaugh is the coach of the NFL's San Francisco 49ers. He's best known for blowing Super Bowls, wearing awful pants, and generally acting like a fucking child and consummate dick. Apparently, ol' Jim couldn't wait another two weeks for the NFL Draft to remind everyone that he's a shitmouth, so he decided to say something really stupid. You know, so we don't forget.
In Scotland next week, at least 21 local bands are going to play in people's homes to raise awareness for depression and to fight against the stigma of mental illness. This is a legitimately awesome thing.
Irish journalist John Waters said a stupid, mean, ignorant thing. This is a something for which he's apparently well-known. And while it was a stark example of the stigma faced by those with depression, there's at least some hope that this will spur a greater conversation, both in Ireland and beyond.
With depression, every day is a long day.
As always, I have linked to each contributor's full story. Clicking on each name will take you to their full story. I will be continuing to publish Depression Stories volumes until I have no more stories in my inbox; e-mail me your story with the subject line "Depression" if you would like it included in a future volume, and remember to indicate whether you would like your story to be anonymous.
The surprising thing is how boring depression can be.
I think most people just think I'm a jerk.
Listen up, ladies! I know you all like to prattle on about victim this, rape culture that. Seriously, I don't understand how you can all be on your periods at once! Now, I know I'm probably going to get flamed by those feminazis at Jezebel for this, but it's time that I took a stand on behalf of all men. The matriarchy is real and we're not going to stand for the misandry that society continues to heap on men.
It's Saturday, and I'm at Six Flags, waiting in line for the Tatsu. I've been in line for over an hour, my feet hurt, my back hurts, and I'm absolutely terrified. I love roller coasters, and I'm not afraid of the speed or heights. I'm afraid of getting in the seat and pulling down the restraint. Will I fit, or will it be the walk of shame this time? I finally reach the seat and step in. My hips are painfully wedged, but I think I should be OK. I pull down the restraint and it almost clicks, then bounces up. I pull again, thinking that if I just get the right pull on it, it will work. No dice. The attendant comes over and pushes. People are starting to notice. My face burns and my hips hurt and now a second attendant is here pushing and finallyâ¦it clicks.
