sorry, what?

*me eating something that I know will make my tummy hurt* i don't really care if this makes my tummy hurt

*a few hours later when my tummy hurts* oh... the quencies ...

happy first Bella From Twilight Depression Month

happy second Bella From Twilight Depression Month

happy last Bella From Twilight Depression Month

i could never be a music reviewer because every single album i would just be like yaaaayyy i loved it i had so much fun!!^_^ im glad they're creating something!!!!^_^

i wish i had a gay cigarette

Fag

i have a name

is anyone else scared

no one else has ever experienced this before

oh god

bro, the me inside your head is kind to you, right? haha? 🤨

bro, you wouldn’t use my memory to represent your own self-doubt and loathing… right bro?

guys we’ve gotta get back into collaging

everyone collage with me

cuts you up and glues you to a piece of paper

they need to let me make movies

what are my qualifications you ask? well i have a lot of thoughts

you actually don't have to go on dating apps to find girlfriends. many beautiful women are waiting for you on rocks out at sea

having one of those executive function days where everything is too many steps

by which i mean, like, here's how my brain parses the steps in making coffee

good day:

regular day:

bad day:

anyway this is a "14 steps to make coffee" kind of day

This is actually a really good way of explaining this

cities with rivers running through them 8/10 cities with rivers on the edge: 5/10 cities with no rivers to be heard of: 3/10

why is there no 10/10 city

rent prices

One or two years ago I got a spam email with these two sentences in them and they’ve been a part of my vocabulary ever since

what if i *remembers that making suicide jokes is not conducive with my goal of improving the wellbeing of myself and everyone around me* transform into an oyster

I LOVE BED

I LOVE PILLOW

I LOVE BLANKEY

Jacques de Lalaing, "Lady Sapphire" (detail) via hatibovic // Alfred Stevens, "The Japanese Mask" (detail) via herta_d

the girls are fightingggggg [readjusts my glasses, squinting] by god… it appears i was mistaken. they're…my goodness…by god