Thank you keemstar for providing the world with one of the funniest tweets of all time

sick of hearing about "healing crystals" that "cleanse your mind and body of negative energy" i want to know which rocks can hurt you and fuck up your vibe so bad

everyone suggesting uranium isn't wrong but anyone who said "literally any rock if you're willing to resort to violence" are the only people who can get on my level. you're hired.

caincore

okay which fandom that sprung up out of nowhere overnight like mushrooms after rain is this a reference to i can't keep up anymore

oh you meant like. that guy from the bible who invented murder. right.

Endlessly diabolical how you can't say words like rape and suicide uncensored without either being criticised by idiots or punished by conglomerates.

It's not r*pe, it's rape. It's not su*cide, it's suicide. Not unalive, dead. The backbone needs to be reintroduced en masse because softening the blow of these concepts with advertising language does absolutely nothing but allow people unaffected by them to feel not even a sting of what they can do, prompting inaction.

And it's been proven that on certain websites, you don't even face a repercussion for using the words as they are. People just started censoring themselves because they feared the potential lack of views and likes and followers which is so nasty itself.

Can't let British people have air conditioning because first they'd call it something twee like "the climate fixer" and then in 20 years they'll call it "the climb" or "the climmy"

French kids would call it "le climot", frustrating language officials who would prefer they call it "machine pour le contrôle du climat froide à l'interieure de l'édifice"

Genuinely, I don’t know how else to get the word out, but I feel like if your home-cooked dinners don’t taste right, you're missing either paprika, sugar, butter, or chicken bouillon.

Still not right? It might be missing one of these: Mustard powder, soy sauce, fish sauce, vinegar. MSG. Ketchup. Mushroom powder. Maple syrup. Honey.

i forgot how fucking hilarious "informational" mental health diagrams can be.

the ultimate game of AI chess: Stockfish (white) vs ChatGPT (black)

by talos this can’t be happening is a mandela effect because the actual phrase is by the gods this can’t be happening and i’ve never heard anyone say the former in game

by talos this can’t be happening

the phrase by talos this can’t be happening is actually from a rupaul roleplay blog who left their husband in a cage with no food and water for a few weeks and the husband died sorry to be the spoil sport but it does have an origin and it is a very tumblr origin in nature

Here’s the post they’re referring to for context

Oh. Skyrim husband.

oh god

Oh Talos

I love seeing it when people find this out. I fucking love it.

at a lesbian bar wearing a vampire costume: I vish to eat your puvsy *my plastic fangs slip out of my mouth and into someone’s drink* *I cry and pull the fire alarm before running out*

i’m going to kdxjdhdjhddjjdhs

pathetic creature...

certified caniac