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Adam's alive in my heart

@changethecircumstances / changethecircumstances.tumblr.com

cat dad [He/They]
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I once had a landlord offhandedly mention that his mother had set this house on fire before. He and his wife lived on the first floor, and i rented the third.

Apparently his mom didn’t like his wife. So she set their house on fire. The house i was living in.

He assured me that everything was fine now and that this was years ago, just kinda laughed, smiled, and said ‘You know how moms are’

Yes. I know how moms are. I know how fucked up moms are as well. I have known many fucked up moms and fellow children of fucked up moms.

Attempted murder through arson is not typical mom behavior, even for a fucked up abusive mom

Oh, and his mother lived next door 🙃

There were two houses next door to each other, both owned by the same family. They had lived there for decades, and for my landlord it was also his childhood home. Each house had three floors that acted as separate units. Every unit in the two houses was occupied by members of the extended family— except for me. I was the oddball living in the attic of one of the houses.

This is the family dynamic i was tossed into

HOUSE ONE

  • 1st floor— landlord and his wife
  • 2nd floor— identical twin sister of landlord’s wife, occasionally children (not clear whose)
  • 3rd floor— me ☺️

HOUSE TWO

  • 1st floor— landlord’s mother, who previously set house 1 on fire
  • 2nd floor— adult daughter of twin sister, her young kids, and current man (changes of man signified by throwing clothes out of window)
  • 3rd floor— creepy brother of the twin sisters who is always outside working on his van

Yes, the rent was dirt cheap

The rent was so cheap that i usually paid in cash— ATM fees were about the same as money orders (and i didn’t have checks)

Then one day my landlord is in his truck, pulling out the driveway when he stops and asks

‘Hey— you haven’t been short on rent these last few months, have you?’

No… I had been paying in full, on time

To his wife. In cash

He wasn’t normally home when i would go to pay rent, so i would give it to her. Figured it was the same as giving it to him.

Turns out instead she was pocketing $100 off the top and telling him i was short each month.

And he knew it was happening. He just wanted to confirm.

‘Each month she makes it her little pay day! Well you know how wives are’

Sir, you need to reevaluate the women in your life because this level of stealing and attempted murder is not normal

“You know how moms/wives are” is a statistical error. Landlord Georg, whose wife and mother steal from and attempt to kill him, respectively, was a outlier and should not be counted

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foone

All the time travelers are hiding out on February 29th, 1900: The day that didn't exist.

See, 1896 was a leap year. 1904 was a leap year. But 1900 wasn't, because the rule for leap years isn't "every 4 years" but "every 4 years, except every 100 years, except except every 400 years".

So 1900 wasn't a leap year. A lot of people at the time didn't know that, and they wrote down the date as 02/29/1900... the US government still has the weather records to prove it. We have recorded temperatures and rainfall on a day that didn't happen.

But if you need to find a time traveler, that's when they're hiding.

Nah.

It's where the time prison is located, the one everyone who fucks with history is rerouted to when they try to travel to their fuckery destination (they are caught retrospectively of course).

It's a loop day and if they try to leave they start over.

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ralfmaximus

March 31st, too.

Because while yes, it technically exists, ever since this gag aired (2010) hiding out on March 31st is like hiding in plain sight.

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not-mary-sue

Alright, to ao3's soon to be arriving Wattpad Refugees, a basic guide to general user culture:

1.) Unlike Wattpads vote system that let's you like each chapter, the ao3 equivalent kudos only allows one per work. Everyone is generally quietly annoyed about this. To engage with each chapter, you're heavily encouraged to comment. Trust me, it makes people's day.

2.) Ao3 has no algorithm. By default it's latest updated work first. You can find things to your taste through searches, filters and tags.

3.) 'No archive warnings apply' and 'user has chosen not to use archive warnings' mean two very different things. No archives warnings means the work is free from any content that could require a warning tag (character death, graphic depictions of violence, non-con, etc). User has chosen not to use archive warnings means it could contain any of the warning content, be it hasn't been explicitly tagged. Treat it like an allergen. No archive warnings apply is allergen free. User has chosen not to use archive warnings, may contain traces or whole chunks of the allergen. If you're likely to have a bad reaction, maybe don't take the risk.

4.) Speaking of warnings, ao3 has very few restrictions on the type of work that's allowed. Whatever your personal thoughts or feelings on that are, thats how the site is. You're likely to run across some dark subject matters and a lot of people are uncomfortable with reading that. You're well within your rights not like these works and have your opinion on whether they should be allowed, but harassing the authors of such works (or any works) is more likely to come back on you than them. Ao3 operates on a strong policy of 'don't like, don't read'. Use the tagging system to your full advantage to only engage with the kind of works you want to see.

We look forward to welcoming you all and seeing the fantastic works you create. Happy writing!

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guooey

this guy suuuucksss he can't catch anythingggg

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aimasup

prev tags

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ailurinae

They only showed two hunts, and said one in three is successful. So he's probably on par. That said, 1 in 3 is pretty good numbers for a lot of predators. Hunting is really hard it turns out.

Leave him alooooone his legs are too short and his paws are cold😭

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miscbones

excellent faces on this guy

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meri-l

Sergey Goroshko in 2021 to promote the movie "Major Grom: Plague Doctor" / Sergey Goroshko in 2024 to promote the movie "Major Grom: The Game"

P.S. It's funny that in 2021 he has natural hair and in 2024 a wig, but it looks the other way around
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