2019 is the year I finally stop using yeet in casual conversation

And oof

boot up, Bitch

me whenever anybody says that they like me/that i’m their friend

I guess he thinks he’s still a kitten [x]

Didn`t need that skin anyways.

LORGE

Thanks

anyone else have a heart thats too soft….. a marshmallow heart…… tempur-pedic mattress heart…. a cotton candy heart…..

in theory its super bad when straight dudes go “hey ur a lesbian? we both like girls we’re the same!” but in reality this has happened twice and most recently was today when a guy i was training in the frame shop went “oh you’re gay?” “yea” “that’s cool. it’s cool that you told me. we both like girls and star wars so it’s nice that we have a shift together :)” like god damn it brett you’re so respectful and thoughtful with your goddamned words

the posts that are like “straight men can never love a woman like a lesbian” are cool jokes and stuff but u gotta really appreciate dudes who have no idea what its like to be gay but try their best to try and relate. “we both like hot ladies” you know what, ryan? that’s close enough. i appreciate that.

— F. Scott Fitzgerald

me resisting the urge to ask people if they still like me

me: oh yeah i’ll watch [insert mega popular easily-accessed netflix thing] at some point

me:

You would not believe your luck

If I gave a flying fuck

i knew this was gonna be good from the freeze frame but i had NO IDEA