I’ve been looking out a window for eighteen years, dreaming about what it might feel like when those lights rise in the sky. What if it’s not everything I dreamed it would be? — TANGLED (2010) dir. Nathan Greno & Byron Howard

poirot, his eyes enormous: you CALLED poirot FRENCH? you called him french like he is not BELGIAN? oh! oh! british food and asymmetry for you! british food and asymmetry for you for Mille Années

Mr. Darcy Proposal #1: It is an honour and a privilege to be loved by me.

Mr. Darcy Proposal #2: It is an honour and a privilege to be loved by you.

The sexiest pronoun change in the English language.

CHARLOTTE HEYWOOD and ALEXANDER COLBOURNE SANDITON — Season 3 Episode 6 (2023)

Okay so like to fully understand the absolute bonkers mess that is Benedick and Beatrice’s relationship please know that it is Really Heavily Implied that before the play starts they actually DID DATE in secret and were courting each other and then Benedick fucked up by being One Of The Boys and Beatrice dropped his sorry ass about it and that’s why they’re so brutal and bitter about each other (and also why they’re both so ready to believe that the other one does really love them after all 🥺)

It’s not just that Benedick rejects toxic masculinity and chooses to break ties with his friends and quit his job to stand with the women and hold the people who wronged them accountable. Its that he does all that in part because he failed to step up and do the right thing before and it cost him everything and he’s not going to make that mistake again.

Benedick’s choices aren’t just the natural progression of his character arc, they are specifically a redemption arc that only he and Beatrice are party to.

They are choices that help and protect Hero in the present, and are an apology in action for how he failed Beatrice in the past.

i’m obsessed with benedick and beatrice and the fact that he trusts her. claudio refuses to believe that hero is innocent no matter what she says. no one believes her, even leonato immediately takes claudio’s word, a man who he has known for a few days, over his own daughter’s. and beatrice knows it’s a lie but no one believes her because the word of a woman means nothing. but benedick believes her. he doesn’t know hero that well, he has no evidence to prove that she is innocent, but he knows she is because beatrice says so, and he trusts her - more than he trusts even claudio, his “sworn brother”. the contrast between claudio’s “proof” destroying his trust in hero, and benedick trusting beatrice no matter what, even though he has no proof

when taylor swift wrote "please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh i could recognize anywhere" that was a better adaptation of persuasion than Persuasion (2022)

reasons why the princess diaries 2 is actually the best movie ever made

ok so i know that when we were all young fanchildren we all watched this movie and sighed dreamily. but i am here to tell u that this movie is even better than u remember

1. the main conflict in the movie is the arranged marriage. i’m gonna stop right here, because princesses in arranged marriages are a classic fanfiction trope that we are all trash for. don’t lie to yourself. but it gets BETTER. not only is there an arranged marriage… the guy she’s arranged to marry is actually a really chill dude. u like this dude. u know they would be good friends and partners. he would make a good king. but sHE DOESNT LOVE HIM!!! she doesn’t love him. and it would be so easy for the narrative to say ~oh look at this selfish girl she has a handsome titled good man ready to marry her she’s so SELFISH for wanting passion and true love, so naive~ (see fuckboys: i’m so nice and handsome why doesn’t she love me she’s horrible) instead the narrative presents her not marrying him as a perfectly valid choice and one the viewer sides with her on. the narrative supports her choice and makes it clear it was the right decision. ADDITIONALLY, the solution presented to fix the arranged marriage problem is to DESTROY THE PATRIARCHY. like???? don’t fuck with me this movie is perfect

2. literally the other main conflict is the love interest. he’s essentially a conman trying to convince mia to fall passionately in love with him so he can steal the throne. but along the way… he falls in love with her. THIS IS LITERALLY THE PLOT OF THREE THOUSAND FANFICTIONS PEOPLE

3. speaking of fanfiction…this movie is one. like, i’m not even joking. the first princess diaries movie essentially compiled the first 3 books into a movie, but the sequel wasn’t based on the books at all. disney just pulled something out of their asses and was like “this will make the fangirls happy”

4. at the beginning of the movie mia graduates from princeton’s woodrow wilson school of international affairs… literally one of the best international studies programs on the planet.. then she’s flown to a castle…where she’s a princess..and has hot men falling all over her…and wears ballgowns…like…mia is such a mary sue but somehow the movie manages to avoid making her one AT ALL

5. also holy shit??! mia doesn’t just stand around looking pretty as a princess.. she’s clearly really smart and genuinely cares about the people of genovia and does her best to serve them well even to it’s hard work… like damn mia is fucking committed to being a good queen she’s not just a princess because castles make good backdrops for romances

6. the queen/joe YAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS u fucking know u shipped that shit

7. THE ENTIRE MOVIE IS ABOUT FUCKING THE PATRIARCHY. MIA IS PORTRAYED AS KIND AND SENSITIVE BUT THAT ADDS TO HER APPEAL AS A RULER NOT DETRACTS FROM IT. AT THE END OF THE MOVIE SHE’S LIKE “fuck these rules written by old white men, i’m gonna make my own less sexist rules” AND THEN SHE FUCKING DOES?!? SHE FUCKING CALLS OUT THE SEXISM OF THE LAWS AND THEN CHANGES THEM. HELLO WOMEN IN PARLIAMENT! GOODBYE BOYS CLUBS! A WOMAN IS FULLY CAPABLE OF RULING ON HER OWN WITHOUT A MAN AND SHE FUCKING DRILLS THAT INTO THEIR GODDAMN HEADS

8. chris pine. what a hot piece of ass amiright

9. the number of times something fucking bizarre happens to mia and she theoretically looks into the camera like she’s on the office is comedic gold honestly. the maids?? flirting with her arranged husband?? climbing out a window?? the fAKE LEG!? mia is just trying to live her life but the universe keeps fucking it up. i feel u mia. 

in sum i have n o idea how the fuck this movie got made but goddamn is it not god’s gift to man

You forgot:

10. It’s women working together that foil the plot. Uncle Gimli’s maid is the one who tells Chris Pine that his uncle sabotaged the romantic night out in order to discredit Mia, aka the love of his life. The last we see of her is her eating pear-flavored popcorn with her feet up.

11. Also the arranged fiance, when she dumps him AT THE ALTAR, he THANKS HER for saving him from just doing his duty and not actually living his own life.

12. Lily. Everything about Lily. “Should I shoo him or should I shoo him? Tell me who to shoo and I’ll shoo.” “My hello is insignificant. Rosencrantz, Guildenstern, come with me.”

Julie Andrews mattress-surfing.

Also this was the first time Julie Andrews sang post-surgery, when she didn’t think she’d ever since again, and the director was all “Okay, we have to get this in one take, because the actors will be emotional” but the crew TOTALLY LOST IT and still managed to get it in one take, even though apparently as soon as she started, it was just TEARS EVERYWHERE.

Also, I was reminded by Twitter that the screenplay was written by…

Shonda Rhimes.

SHONDA DID WHAT NOW

Unpopular opinion: I like the Princess Diaries 2 better than the first one.

Don’t forget

“‘Fear’ is not in my vocabulary.”

“Perhaps. But it’s in your eyes.”

DONT FORGET THE STAN LEE CAMEO!!!!!!

“His first day was on location with Kylie Minogue, but all eyes, even Kylie’s, were on Bernard. He’d turned up with a suitcase full of props, just in case, including a rubber chicken. And what an actor. Oh, really though, what a wonderful actor. We once took him to the TV Choice Awards and sent him up on his own to collect the award, and the entire room stood up and cheered him. That’s a lovely memory. He’d phone up and say, ‘I’ve got an idea! What if I attack a Dalek with a paintball gun?!’ Okay, Bernard, in it went! He loved Gill with all his heart; he mentioned her in every conversation we ever had. A love story for the ages. I’m so lucky to have known him. Thanks for everything, my old soldier. A legend has left the world.”  — Russell T. Davies

BERNARD JOSEPH CRIBBINS, OBE (29th December 1928—28th July 2022)

Is it not peculiar, how we can be strangers to our own affections?

Austenland (2013)

Henry Nobley apprecation (Austenland 2013, dir. Jerusha Hess)

My name is Henry. It’s Henry Nobley. I’m a history professor. I used to think my aunt’s profession was somewhat grotesque, but the truth is that I enjoyed stepping into history. The idea of a simpler world where love is straightforward and lasting. I believe we have that in common. But all of this is secondary to the fact that I am completely mad about you.

anthony bridgerton is my favorite brand of male character. he’s a whore with a tragic past and a fear of love. his crimes? being sexy and making terrible choices. and to top it off he’s got eldest sibling disorder. he’s literally perfect.

THE BEST THING EVER

@belmongrandhoteltimeo