the worms and maggots eating away at george h w bush’s corpse

my third eye has astigmatism 

i know a guy who’s bought in entirely to microsoft’s ecosystem. he’s got a windows 10 computer, windows phone, uses microsoft edge, and has bing as his main search engine. he refers to looking things up on the internet as ‘binging’ it. very surreal, never met anyone else like that

customers wanna be right soooo bad. like damn go clock in since u know so much

Strong opinions about his apples

Hiya tumblr, it’s me, Dennywise. Would you like your pancake back?

Take it.

dennys i am going to drive directly to your restaurant and kill you with my bare hands

Is she ok?

yeah but she died 

Relatable

who is saying that