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Beauty & The Bath Salts

@lady-alternate / lady-alternate.tumblr.com

Natalie Thirtysomething Lesbian Depressed ask me stuff
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chuwenjie

I’m so excited to share some of the work I did for my personal passion project/Cartoon Network intern pitch, GIRL GANG! (Ideally I’m hoping to eventually publish it as a graphic novel/webcomic!)

The story takes place in a future where ocean levels have risen and covered the Earth, leaving only chains of islands where continents used to be. On an island in the Pacific, a gang of street girls fight to survive the oppression of the Empire, a civilization from across the ocean that is on a mission to colonize and conquer all the world’s remaining land. 

Some brief character blurbs about the main gang: Miya- the quiet and somewhat shy leader of the gang who talks little but packs a massive punch with her baseball bat; Emi- the gang’s getaway driver and auto specialist and the disowned daughter of a wealthy Inner Circle family; Yuyu- the black market dealer and scavenger with a bubbly personality and an obsession with 200-year-old anime artifacts; and Blue- a Muy Thai fighter who values honor and justice above all else, and defected from her previous gang when Miya saved her life.

On the opposing side, Riza’s gang of wealthy and entitled elitist Inner Circle girls are out to wreak havoc in the Outskirts, and end up clashing with Miya and her gang as a result. Riza is the daughter of a highly influential politician and believes herself to be superior to “Outskirts trash,” while Krystal (the Empire’s number one teenage pop idol), Jin (a cyber hacker) and Momo (a skilled wrestler who sticks with Riza out of a desire to belong) enable her to put the Outskirts in what she perceives to be their rightful place.

That’s all for now but I hope you all enjoy!! I love this project and I can’t wait to fully realize it sometime in the near future. (ALSO: IF YOU WANNA DO FANART- GO RIGHT AHEAD, JUST PROMISE YOU’LL SHOW ME!!) Love, Kat!

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My heart is broken.

A bright, shining light has gone out. There will forever be a void in it’s place, that nothing can fill.

Oh, Tara. You’re gone and there was still so much I wanted to say; so much for us to share.

One day I shall take comfort in knowing that a spark like yours can never truly be extinguished, never truly die; but not tonight.

Goodnight, sweet princess.

Two years. You’re still with me, in my thoughts and in my heart.

I love you and I miss you, every day.

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Things that have changed...

...since last we spoke.

1) Posting to Tumblr is weird now. Though I guess most of you noticed the gradual changes less?

2) I started working again, on a part time basis, doing press for a wonderful non-profit in the UK that helps to provide avenues to work and social engagement for adults with learning disabilities or mental health difficulties.

3) I am no longer romantically involved with a woman in Sweden. It came to an end abruptly in October, and while I’m heartbroken and adrift I think it might have been for the best.

4) In November, I nearly died! Meningitis sucks, kids. I ended up being in hospital for nine days, had four lumbar punctures in one day (only one was successful) got heralded by the Doctors for having a completely inhuman pain threshold, and lost a lot of weight because I ate nothing at all for nearly two weeks.

5) While I didn’t die, a young woman called Hannah on my ward did, and I watched someone robbed of their future by the final stages of cancer. As a result I eventually took the money I was gifted at Christmas and donated it to the Marie Curie charity here in the UK.

6) After leaving hospital I went to stay with family for six weeks because although I wasn’t in danger of dying any more I also wasn’t in a place where I could look after myself physically, mentally or emotionally.

7) I put most of the weight back on. Arse.

8) As an indirect result of 3, above, I have begun to watch Hockey again regularly, and my friend in Detroit has converted me completely to the Red Wings. The first game we watched together I commented that Dylan Larkin had the rosiest cheeks I’ve ever seen, and so he was named “my” boy. He’s gone on to be amazing.

9) Saw Star Wars at a midnight showing, and felt five years old again.

10) Saw Star Wars again with my Mum and she screamed “NO!” out loud in the theatre at a certain point. She was inconsolable after and has still not forgiven me for keeping silent about the movie and thus not preparing her for the shock.

So how about you?

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spacebattles

I wish more foods were named in the same vein as “I Can’t Believe Its Not Butter!”

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redfurniture

You’ve Got To Be Pulling My Leg, THIS Is Ranch?!

Shut The Fuck Up, Are You Telling Me This Shit Is Ketchup??

I Firmly Believe This Is Not Mustard And I Am Horribly Wrong

I Refused To Believe That This Condiment Was Barbecue Sauce, And I Have Been Summarily Flayed For My Apostasy

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sigmaleph

I Assigned Negligible Probability To This Being Chili Sauce And Have Since Updated

In Which Your Humble Narrator Assumed That The Substance Within This Container Was Not Worchestershire Sauce Only To Be Rudely Awakened From This Delusion By Mysterious Circumstances

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Conversations with my girlfriend:

Me: Do you think that it's possible there's an evolved civilization of psychic giant squid in the deep ocean?
Her: No. It's far more likely they got their psychic powers from worshipping Cthulhu.
Me: So while we differ on their origins, we're at least agreed that there are psychic giant squid down there.
Her: Fucking Mind Flayers.
Me: Welp. You're the nerd for me. I ♥ you.
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reblogged

Thank you for your blog, and for your "Stony Hate Manifesto" especially; I have a friend who is a big fan of it, and would bring it up often enough that I would dissolve into Godzilla-like roars of rage rather than managing any sort of articulate discussion once they asked "What don't you like about it?" I showed them your Manifesto, said "This is why." So thank you for being more articulate than I could ever be about that subject; our friendship, and my sanity, are spared.

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Ahaha, it took me two days to write that so that it sounded coherent instead of just like an angry badger screaming into the wind.

Which is to say, I understand your rage, I really do, and you’re welcome. Glad I could help. :) 

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"Angry badger screaming in to the wind"

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Internet Radio Stuff!

So, someone who means a lot to me has an internet radio show, and you should listen to it.

She'll be playing music ranging from badass to cute and everything inbetween, so tune in at 17:00 UK time / 18:00 CET / 12:00 EST (i.e. in about 20 minutes) and listen.

You know you want to.

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The service was ended by Carol "Captain Marvel" Danvers, Howlett's long-term drinking partner, confidant and rumoured secret paramour pouring a bottle of the cheapest Canadian whiskey imaginable into the casket, to the strains of Celine Dion's "My Heart Will Go On." A beautiful send-off for a hairy little hero, whose deeds shall mostly remain classified, lest we realise that he was essentially a serial killer. God loves, man kills.

- My favourite part of the satire mock-article I wrote for Mutant Magazine #2, covering the funeral of Wolverine.

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