I have no idea

Lovely sentiment but the way it’s worded sounds like this dude got fucking killed during a little league game

i want limited edition shrek crocs in size 6

“I’m so anti-fascist I report my friends and neighbors to the feds”

“I would have never snitched on Anne Frank! Anyway, here’s a person I’m related to at the capitol!”

Hey I don't know if you know this but snitching on someone for storming the capitol with intent to kill someone is not the same as snitching on someone for the crime of... *checks notes* being a jewish child

turns out i DO prefer tumblr’s way of providing me with information, in that i get it from memes and fatalistic humor instead of the panic attack info dump of twitter

i love that 17th century jewish poltergeist story where the family living in the haunted house calls a catholic priest for help before they contact a rabbi, because yeah, i think that would be my call too; id be like, oh? a demon in my house speaking latin and drawing inverted crosses on my wall in sulfuric bile? then without even questioning my faith i’d call up the catholic church and be like yo father, one of your boys loose come get him

4-2-2011

I never considered baby capybaras were a thing but here I am, d'awstruck but the tiny adorable child

babybara

holy shit

cant get over the fact that the mandalorian has very little plot and is literally just sexy space cowboy single dad pedro pascal flying around doing freelancing gigs for gas money to protect his 50 year old green son who is an infant. star wars has peaked

Why would you stop this genius system? Just start paying the raccoons and call it a day

Unionize the raccoons.

the character designs from this kitty litter commercial are oodling my fucking noodles

look at them. amazing

This is what Cats 2019 could have been

This is the funniest tweet I’ve ever seen.

Dude, you can’t just post this without showing what that guy casually described as “a plate of fish and chips”

How much of a twat do you have to be to have fish and chips that looks like this

Six chip twat

do you motherfuckers not want to sleep ever again

It's all fun and games until the cat yaks under there at 3:00am and you have to commando crawl in there with a pack of Chlorox wipes like fucking Theseus going to slay the minotaur

God bless nurses forever

No more gender-locked items in character creators. Society has progressed beyond the need for gender-locked items in character creators