the stuff of legends...

THIS IS TOO MUCH 💀😂

“Do NOT tell the world about this” 200,000 notes

im sorry how tf do you mistake a rabbit for a cat?

Did I need to hear this?  Yes.

Did I mainly reblog it because I realized it’s a Tumblr post of a screen shot of a Twitter post that’s a screenshot of a Facebook post.  Very yes.

I’ve been reading through the notes and I just have to say that I absolutely promise, promise, promise you that nobody in the dental surgery is there to judge you, and we’re certainly not mad at you. Cavities happen. Even to dentists. You think your dentist has a mouth full of virgin teeth? Unlikely! They’ve all visited eachother’s surgeries to get a quickie filling (ooh, saucy) between patients. They understand that life can get in the way of oral hygiene sometimes. They understand that life’s too short not to eat chocolate. They understand that you’ve got to live. I swear to you that everyone in that room is just there to help you. Please, please, please don’t stop going to the dentist because you’re worried they’ll be mad at you. It’s really not the case. They understand. It’s fine. It’s really, really fine. Please go to the dentist. I promise you it’s ok.

You would not believe how comforting this is.

THIS.

I stand by this message whole heartedly but also I thought this said “I can’t eat applesauce” and I was so fucking confused.

Were it not for ops comment i would not have known that says applause. I was ready to take this post at face value reading that shit as applesauce because thats just what you do on this bitch if a site

Why would anyone want to consume it!?

I teach my 7th graders about the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide.

I bring in a graduated cylinder of it and we talk about how it’s used in nuclear power plants and gmo crops. How inhaling even the small amount I’m holding can lead to suffocation or even death. It’s found in vaccines and cancer cells, but also in infant formula and pet food. It is a huge component of acid rain, can cause severe burns, and has been found in places that were thought to be the most pristine and unpolluted locations on earth.

We talk about how there are little to no regulations on this chemical. No bans, no warning labels, and most manufacturers don’t even have to disclose their use of it in their products.

My students are outraged. We talk about what we can do. Create posters and flyers to spread awareness. Contact our senators with petitions to ban DHMO. Spread this information all over social media.

Then I explain that the real problem with dihydrogen monoxide is that….when I am thirsty…there is just nothing else as refreshing, and then I watch their looks of absolute shock and horror as I drink the entire vial down.

I. Fucking. Love. This.

This is how misinformation works. How propaganda works. How manipulation works.

may our education be stronger than fake news

Amen.

To those who don’t get it:

“Dihydrogen monoxide” is the chemical name for water, AKA H2O.

another important element of understanding the joke is understanding how pH levels work

yup.  that’s a higher number alright.

“Everyone who has ever touched or consumed this chemical has died”

Guy wanted me to make him a queen-size blanket.

I try, as a rule, not to reblog garbage fires. But there is something about this garbage fire that made me break that rule. 

Something fibercraft people understand about the value of their time. 

We need more images like these i think

you know when little kids are told to smile for the camera and they do the biggest grin bc they aren’t self conscious about their teeth yet they just give it their all.. that’s wat this looks like

Magical encounter while free falling.

Can you imagine being that bird? You see a big falling dot off in the distance, so you go to investigate. And it’s a human. Just, like, hanging out, in the middle of the sky. Plumbing toward earth at terminal velocity.

“Huh, that’s weird” you think to yourself.

You land on them. They seem nonplussed by their predicament.

But you’re a busy bird, you’ve got places to be. So you just fly off. Good luck, crazy human. Hope you make it.

“Oh, hey, I guess they can fly. I did not know that.”

gordon ramsey: is the food good here?

underpaid server: 

My favourite thing about that show is how he treats servers. It was also the source of some very intense fantasies when I was a barista of him busting into my cafe, calling my boss a fucking idiot, then taking me against the broken dishwasher.

world heritage post

When the hoes comin at you but you waitin for bae

the noises he makes… i’m convinced this man is some sort of docile demon living amongst the populace due to his affinity for human cuisine

where can i find a freak that treats me the way he treats that slab of meat

isnt this salt sprinkling meme guy?

yes. yes it is.

Someone moving your necklace clasp back to the nape of your neck is a top tier form of intimacy that’s quite frankly ... unmatched....

Pros of chubby gf

- soft

- nice hugs

- thigh pillows??? Tiddy pillows??

Cons of chubby gf

- none

Pros of skinny gf

- fits in ur arms rly nicely

- ur hoodies are too big on her which is beautiful

Cons of skinny gf

- none

Pros of muscled gf

- abs?? Biceps??? Please???

- strong gf pick me up pls

- most likely works out a lot which is hot

Cons of muscled gf

- none

Hi I live in Richmond VA and I love my city so much, this morning 60 people woke up to find old television sets just sitting on their porches or lawns. Even better, those with security cameras recorded the person(s) responsible and they cannot be identified because they were wearing a jumpsuit and tv on their head

A new local cryptid I’m so stoked