blimey this is sad - he was also known as Urf

the phrase "moon's haunted" rewired my brain the moment it entered my vocabulary never in my life have i encountered a phrase more infectious or fun to use

coworker: [after turning on the lights in the warehouse and noticing half of them are flickering or won't turn on at all] hey james what's up with the lights

me: oh idk i guess the light's haunted

coworker: what?

me, shrugging: light's haunted

[later that day]

another coworker: hey, what's up with the lights?

coworker i was with earlier: light's haunted

other coworker: what???

coworker, without changing expression or missing a beat: light's haunted

thanks to advancements in modern science and education i know how a lot of things work and can explain if asked, but sometimes it's just more fun to apply the exact same logic to the situation as a 14th century alchemist

Sound on

CHIRRUPY BABY OH GOODNESS

Fellas this isn't good enough, why isn't it burning? Are you really gonna let it survive through Christmas???

BURN THE DAMN GOAT

MOLOTOV SLINGSHOT ON THE ROOF I DONT CARE DO WHATEVER IT TAKES

Tumblr: Let me introduce you to the people you’ve always needed in your life.

Also Tumblr: Sorry, they all live approx. 2 million miles away.

How many times can the same thing break your heart?

As long as you love it.

“as long as you love it” this really hit me

I think it’s hilarious when people tell me I’m laid back because I’ve pretty much been screaming nonstop in my head since like fifth grade

Red Ranger be like

“oh no someone with common sense”

The rarest superpower.

PUT RESPECT ON MY MAN'S NAME

Vegeta : im royalty (up til ssgss arc)

Kaiba: bitch, I'm rich

Escanor: dudley from street fighter

Yusuke is top g my guy.

OBSESSED with the fact that there’s a redditor out there who calls themselves “PISS BOT” but carries themselves with the unflappable politeness of a confused Victorian gentleman. 

the most beautiful stories repeat themselves over and over and over again, time weaving itself into a blanket to warm our beds

Fun Facts About Honey

- Honey is mostly sugar (WoW!) it is 80% sugar and 20% water (double WoW!)

- There are over 20,000 species of bees, but only 4 make HONEY

-Honey is the ONLY food that contains all the substances you need to survive (Including WATER)

-Children under the age of 1 should not eat honey… why? because sometimes it contains bad stuff called botulism and can cause them to get botulism poisoning (that sucks, even infants should taste the deliciousness that is honey)

-Honey will crystallize under optimum temperatures (this has a lot to do with how you store it)

-Bees produce honey to eat during the winter when there are no flowers and no nectar for them.

-A honeybee would only need an ounce of honey to be able to fuel a flight around the world (this makes for a very cultural bee!)

-A typical beehive can make up to 400 pounds of honey a year! (Wowza!)

This reads like it was written by a bee and I’m 100% here for it

This is singlehandedly THE BEST compliment I have ever received :)

wow players having to stand in lines for a quest because a relevant npc can only talk to one player at a time. is the funniest image on the planet

i need to correct this: wow classic doesn’t have any npcs that can only talk to one player at a time. these lines actually formed for a quest npc that players had to kill to complete the objective. knowing that i think this image is even funnier.

Literally this

My favourite is the guy saying, “This is like being at the dmv”

genuinely terrifying how adhd will have you be fully aware of the responsibilities you’re neglecting and yet its like you’re being piloted by a super chill hedonistic demon who can’t hear you/doesnt care

NATASIA DEMETRIOU as NADJA OF ANTIPAXOS ⤷ 4.07 Pine Barrens

[ID in alt text]

what

what anime is this because that’s seattle

Thats not anime, thats just how it is over there.

#take him to the polycule

Why doesn’t tumblr have a mascot?

What the hell are you people on about

If tumblr has any animal as mascot these days, it’s most likely crabs.

…Carcinization strikes again…