Honestly, the McElboys are so refreshing in times like these.

If we date, you gotta kiss me every 2 minutes

me, taking trying to take a peaceful shit: :)

my husband when it’s been 2 mins: 

Almost every gay person I’ve met likes pokemon

if you’re lgbt what’s your favorite pokemon

when your friend Mark forgets to return the worms he borrowed from you

The short involves Goofy doing domestic chores for his wife, which was an odd concept in the 1950′s. So based on the Milkman not knowing who he was kissing in this bit, it implies that Goofy’s wife was fucking the Milkman.

I’m sorry, I have to reblog this again, cause now THIS abominable exchange is happening in my head: “Dad, how did mom die?” “Maxie… d'ya know wut it’s lahk tuh be cucked?”

imagine being one of the most powerful people in the world and having the audacity to tweet some useless shit like that 

My energy

im the girl

EAT THE RICH

Who is she I adore her

okay literally who is she why doesn’t she have her own show

her name is dasha nekrasova! 

Some background in her own words:

In an interview with Teen Vogue, Dasha explained what the interview was like. “When I realized I was on Infowars, I was excited because I figured they would say something crazy and funny,” she said. “It wasn’t hard to ‘own’ Ashton because nothing she said made sense or even followed a logical train of thought. I was honestly stunned when she started talking about rats, so a lot of what’s happening with me in the video is sheer bewilderment.”

She also explained her “worms in your brains” comment: “When I said, ‘I just want people to have healthcare, honey,’ one of their reporters said off-camera, ‘That’s what Hugo Chavez said,’” Dasha said. “And when I looked in their eyes, they seemed so sick and crazy, like they had parasites in their brain that were making them say all this stupid, confused sh*t.”

Dasha went on to share why she expressed her support for free universal healthcare, saying, “As an uninsured person, I feel personally victimized by the idea that anyone should be denied healthcare. Poor people shouldn’t get sick and die because they can’t afford to see a doctor, obviously,” she said. She also made a point to distinguish her socialist beliefs from mainstream liberalism.

“When Infowars posted the clip on YouTube, they titled it ‘Liberals Defend Socialism at Bernie Sanders Event,’” she said. “It seems like there is a lot of conservative confusion and conflation of ‘liberal’ and ‘leftist.’

“I’m a democratic socialist and a Bernie supporter and believe in things like wealth redistribution and socialized healthcare,” she said. “I’m not even an especially political or radical person — I read Marx in college, which affirmed my views that capitalism is evil and responsible for many of our social ills, which feels to me like common sense having experienced poverty.”

An Infowars post appears to indicate that the original video of Dasha has been removed. But Dasha wanted to make sure future generations could see her answers.

“I posted the video on my Twitter for posterity,” she said, “and I thought it was funny [that] they took it down because they’re such failures.”

She is a national treasure.

Fun Disney Fact! Fiona was the first red-headed Disney Princess when she made her debut in 1988, one year before Ariel did in The Little Mermaid (1989)!

Shrek came out in 2001

Good for him.

I accidentally made eye contact with a mall booth salesperson and barely escaped a 25 minute long skin care demonstration where she tried to trap me in a sale no less than 4 times

The rules of engagement for mall kiosk owners and pokemon trainers are exactly the same

i love the fact that there are two pictures of eyes that I now read as two different phrases without question

these are so powerful

concept:

it’s free perishing 

wakes up and goes to my assigned security guard position standing near a barrel that’s bright red and has a flame printed on it

hey gang im ordering 14 dollars worth of soda and nothing else from my local dominos

im thorsty

He better not fucking have

please watch this john mulaney bit from snl of him complaining about how computers ask us if we are robots it is hilarious 10/10 would recommend

The epic saga.