was just Remembering how you’d be out with a friend and you’d each order a different cocktail and you’d ask “what’d you get?” and they’d read the description off the menu and you’d be like “ooh that sounds good” and then they’d say “try it!” and then you’d have a lil sip of their drink and they’d have a lil sip of your drink and you’d decide which one was best and you wouldn’t give each other a life-threatening respiratory infection
Toucan: “that there just ain’t natural”
I love this so much, I’m gonna start saying “nuts” we need to bring it back
I love b&w proper ladies breaking character with “sonofabitch”
“OHH you’re following me, oUUhhh I didn’t know that!”
It brings me such joy that people seem to have always done the *sputters and blows raspberries like you’re having a stroke* thing when they stammer
God damn my soul 😂
When my cousin Olivia was three, she started preschool and became best friends with a boy named Abraham. Most people called him Abe, even then, because Abraham is a mouthful for a three year old and, to most people, it’s the logical nickname.
Not, however, according to Olivia, who decided to nickname him Ham.
No one’s really sure whether she wasn’t totally listening when he was introduced and only caught the last part of his name, or if she decided Abe was too boring a nickname, or maybe she was just hungry, but the nickname has stuck for the last twenty years. Of course, Olivia was and still is the only person to use it.
When they were seven or eight, he decided to get back at her by calling her Olive. That nickname stuck, too, and they’ve been Olive and Ham since. But only to each other. They get highly offended if anyone else calls them that.
Last night was their seventh anniversary, and Abe proposed to Olivia, and she said yes. And how did she announce it on Facebook, you may ask?
People used to tell me “If you like ham so much, why don’t you just marry it?” So I am.
Shout out to Olive and Ham, who are still engaged and adorable and who are planning on getting married sometime next summer
hades explaining that he’s the god of the dead, not the god of death
Thanatos explaining that he’s the god of death, not hades
Thanatos explaining that it applies to animals too
Poseidon explaining that he is the god of the seas and oceans
Zeus explaining why he can’t keep it in his pants
Hermes explaining why he gotta go fast
dionysus explaining why he’s Like That
https://twitter.com/mohammadhussain/status/1340439172687998981?s=21
I'm wheezing. Thank you, Mohammad, this thread is amazing. Now go put more lights on things!
Din Djarin + chaotic single dad energy
Lake Michigan
Ocean*
I mean, Lake Michigan is big enough to be a sea. All the Great Lakes are, they’re not considered seas because they’re not all at sea level, they’re all freshwater, and they’re not directly connected to the ocean (they’re only connected through rivers and lochs)
Small lakes don’t have noticeable waves but because the Great Lakes are so big there’s enough room for the air to downdraft across it (which is also why in Michigan you get lake effect weather and so it can be a blizzard one day and 70° the next)
My grandmother, who grew up in Puerto Rico, when seeing Lake Michigan for the first time with my grandfather exclaimed, “This is not a lake, it is a sea!”
Lake Superior has tides. They’re not as dramatic as the actual ocean’s of course. But still. For every storm that kicks up 200ft spray and waves that crash over the tops of the lighthouses on the piers, there’s days when you can’t tell where the water meets the sky.
Lake Superior doesn’t have a monster, Lake Superior IS the monster.
lake superior (gichi-gami in ojibwe) has enough water in it cover both america’s in a foot of it. it contains 10% of the worlds fresh surface water! it’s 1333 ft deep!!! she’s Big
They say that she doesn’t give up her dead either.
Man living nearby all the great lakes when I first saw what Most people consider a lake, I thought it was just a super big pond kinda thing
There’s a reason why they’re called “great” lakes.
Fun fact you could fit roughly 6.5 billion pulverized chickens into lake michigan
That last one is oddly specific
Steampunk was the weirdest moment in fashion/nerd culture because it was like everyone just suddenly decided that “Victorian Britain but with wildly anachronistic steam machinery” was the coolest concept ever and it lasted like two full years. It was so specific. It was so, so specific. Usually fashion trends that come in are “florals” or “high waisted jeans” not “entire alternate history timeline,” like what was up with that… can we make a new fashion trend based on some weird alternate history concept like “the 1920s but everyone is a mage?”
Shut the FUCK up about Harry Potter, Fantastic Beasts is a shitty, boring, unimaginative series restricted by its source material. I’m talking about COOL MAGIC. I’m talking about rum runners getting into a magical car chase, throwing fireballs over their shoulder at the cops. I’m talking about the fae holding court in a lavish underground speakeasy. I’m talking about a lycanthrope mafia. I’m talking about detectives using a spell to make the fingerprints on a weapon glow for further inspection. Stop dwelling on past terrible franchises and start opening your minds
To add to this:
I’m so glad the NHL has embraced the bubble
THE TRILOGY
I’m convinced to learn fencing