It didn’t take a whole genocide for me to realize the USA has never been the good guy and will never be the good guy and everyone in its borders are all passively complicit in global warmongering by doing nothing and we are all victims of state-sponsored gaslighting.
When I was 18 years old i wanted the chance to re-elect the first black president. by this time, i was already a regular tumblr lurker. like i’ve stated many times before, i was here to witness social justice adjacent politics on the internet be born. tumblr is where it all started and every conversation you see elsewhere finds its origins on here. it’s funny looking back on it if you know how unhinged these communities were, but i’m grateful for the experience lol.
on tumblr, there was a group of anti-imperialists who were not explicitly marxist or anything, but they basically pointed out all the international devilry the USA has been responsible for under the previous two administrations, both democrat and conservative. these posters were from african countries, middle eastern countries, and south asia. of course, obama’s drone strikes was a hot button issue on here, where black american anti-racists clashed with the anti-imperialists because they didn’t wanna feel bad for rallying behind an evil man based on identity politics. as a black american myself, i was uncomfortable and felt some type of way, but hey, right is right. the anti-imperialists were right. i just silently watched these debates explode every time, looking at both sides. the anti-racists had to concede that, yes, drone strikes are bad, and those who authorize drone strikes are bad.
so when obama’s re-election comes up, i’m like, surely he knows the drone strikes are bad. because we all know drone strikes are bad now. even cornel west, a high profile figure, said obama was wrong! there are so many articles in mainstream newspapers that say drone strikes are bad now! he will stop the drone strikes this time!
so, i voted for obama, with the stupidly innocent and stupidly naive confidence that we as a people could “hold him accountable.” sound familiar? liberals who are stuck in the matrix still think this.
i avidly watched his inauguration. even held up the black power fist as i watched him walk down the aisle to give his speech. it ended. i logged on tumblr to watch the memes, the celebration, the happiness.
then, i saw someone post an article.
everything just kinda broke inside of me. imagine the coolest shonen anime character you know transforming to their next form and all the buildings are crumbling around their aura and the onlookers look in amazement and horror. that’s what happened in my little brain.
the horrors of the realization hit me like an atom bomb, i’m being lied to, everything is a lie, what else have i been lied to about? the united states has been lying. the cool kids call this “coping.”
that was the day i became an anti-imperialist. January 22nd, 2013. that was the day i understood democrats and conservatives are simply performing being opposed to each other to keep the masses entertained and distracted. i broke out of the matrix, as the cool online kids say.
i floundered around being different versions of a lefty-oriented liberal for maybe a year. i called myself an “anarcho-socialist” which is just a fancy way of saying you’re a liberal who doesn’t support democrats.
Learning about palestine in 2014 made me a communist. i felt comfortable abandoning every lie and delusion i still held onto about america’s greatness, about capitalism, about voting, etc. nothing about it is redeemable. this country has a demonic level of bloodlust, and will throw its own citizens in the wood chipper to satiate and enforce it. those still stuck in the whole two-party circus act rightfully see me as inconvenient. i’m what they both call a filthy “tankie,” as the cool kids say. and, surprisingly enough, i’ve never felt more at peace. i have an amazing amount of clarity about where i live, now. nothing the U.S. and its allies do surprise me.
if you made it to the end of my rambling kudos to you lol now i have to get ready to clock in and keep the wheels turning.
