Christmas Tony! 🎄❄🎄

when gerard way sings "the broken, the beaten, and the damned" and when kermit the frog sings "the lovers, the dreamers, and me" they're talking about the same people btw

The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes + reactions

imagine you are fifteen years old taking your little sister to the grocery store because your dad is busy and your grandmother is old and you need food. as you turn a corner you accidentally ram your shopping cart into God with a capital G and he promises to show you the world you’ve never seen from inside the ten square miles of your hometown in exchange for your company. you hate the risk but your demigod sister has untapped potential and an unrelenting determination to get ghost, so you follow God with a capital G through heaven and hell and back. God with a capital G is twelve and wiser than even your grandmother and treats everything like a game and he’s your brother now and suddenly you would (and have and will) kill and die for him. your first love becomes a different god and you add her name to the list of things (your childhood, your vulnerability, your parents, your safety) you don’t have the time to grieve right now (or ever) and you become a man on foreign soil and your dad isn’t there to see it. you are fifteen and God with a capital G’s best friend and your little sister– sisters, now– are the most powerful demigods on the planet and you are the only one keeping three divine tweens focused on saving the world and you are still not allowed to say fuck.

I thought this was the strangest short fiction I’d ever read until I checked the tags. Yeah, I guess ATLA is kinda crazy isn’t it

I'm in love with involuntary validation of a relationship. My best friend saying "our spot", my brother saying "our cookie recipe" or my mum saying "our song". Like YES I LOVE YOU TOO. I'm so soft for it.

DO NOT LET SOCIAL MEDIA TURN YOU INTO AN AMERICAN

Today we are all Brazilian

They gatekeeping blasphemy now too 💀

lmaoooooo so a video popped up on my TikTok of a story time of some guy trying to buy his wife tampons and some woman going up to him thinking he was a trans man saying, “see? you’ll always be a woman!”

and he turned to the woman like “I’m buying tampons for my wife because I’m a good fucking husband. do you think if they were for me, I’d look this lost about where the brand is she wants?” he shut her up so fast lmfao. and she walked away looking pale and teary because transphobic people always have to play the victim.

(but also this is what I mean when I say transphobia can affect anyone and being transphobic literally takes over your mind. you cannot think critically at all about anything to do with gender or sex and anyone diverting from the image you have of how things are in your black and white world view is automatically The Enemy)

hey quick PSA:

please do not post a ton of porn and get your account banned until the actual full rollout has taken place and the guidelines are updated, it will be very sad for you

I think we as queer people all know the “oh” moment where you realize you’re not straight/cis but no one talks about the “goddamnit not again” moment where you thought you completely figured out your gender/sexuality only for you then to discover another label and have to start the whole process over again

#girlboss voice become ungovernable (via @cupcakesandtv)

Actually, the way how this works is pretty neat.

i know what i’d use it for

*checks* YES they have it!

it’s in their shop

I know what this sounds like, but I don’t think Tim Chalamet Willy Wonka is going to be a tumblr sexy man. I think we might somehow have too much dignity for that.

This shorted out my brain for 30 seconds, but when you’re right, you’re right

I love how all of the Batman villains are like “ah he’s not at the manor, it’s defenseless! and then alfred just racks an AK-47 and is like pull up bitch

Batman’s Villains: The butler will be easy prey!

He’s just an old man…he doesn’t have any of the Batman’s gadgets or training or fighting skills!

Alfred: Oh my you’re right

There’s something else of Master Bruce’s I don’t have as well

(Cocks a shotgun) A CODE AGAINST KILLING

Batman’s Villains: Wayne isn’t here to save you old man!

Alfred:

Alfred is the original “Call an ambulance — but not for me”

@dragonpuppies I spent way too long on this

Bruce: I have a code.

Alfred: And I have a gun.

Bruce: time to remove the guns.

Alfred: good fucking luck.

I’ve peer reviewed @ebonyheartnet’s addition and found that it deserves a reblog.

Generic Long Text Post from 2012-2014

OP: So why the fuck do barbers have these swirly pole thingys??

1st comment: They siphon the energy of lost hair.

2nd comment: ALRIGHT MOTHER FUCKERS PULL UP A CHAIR AND TAKE A SEAT AT YOUR DESKS BECAUSE IM ABOUT TO LEARN YOU A THING.

SEE THIS MOTHERFUCKER? ITS A MOTHER FUCKING BOOBLE POOLE FROM MEDIEVAL TIMES.

*60 lines of text you can find from wikipedia*

IM PRETTY PASSIONATE ABOUT BOOBLE POOLES OK?

3rd comment: Things are getting heated up in the Booble Pooles fandom!

End of post