The Girl on the Couch, Pang Xunqin, 1930

Aweng Chuol by Dennis Tejero for System Magazine - May 2019

Naomi Campbell 1997 / ph: Dave Bennett

Death Valley, CA, by Dizzy Atmosphere

one day i hope you realize how pure my intentions were and how deeply i cared for you.

I have been thinking of the ways we tell people things. My father's hands shake, but he holds the phone up so I can watch the video from six feet away. My mother emails me the recipe of her beef stroganoff at 6 in the morning with the comment - woke up and didn't want to forget to do this! On the highway, we sing so loudly my voice grows hoarse; on the beach I sneak nice rocks into people's hands so they have something to hold, on the floor we all sit quietly in the same agreeable silence. We are all saying the same thing.

My friends say "Oh you know, keeping busy." This means they are having a hard time but making themselves survive it. I ask them to help me walk me dog; this is me telling them it's okay sometimes to just be present and talk about young adult fiction. When I cancel again because I can't get out of bed, she tells me she's on her way with cookies.

I point out the sunset. She shares her fork before I ask for it. He calls me at 1 AM just because I'm on the road alone, we talk about stupid shit. She waits for me to get indoors safely before driving away. He says - nah, forget it, I'm happy to do it for free.

People are saying it, you know? They say it often and loudly. Sometimes, you know - you just have to be listening.

i hope you never forget yourself in the midst of loving someone else

           Manfred Schröder                            Lunar Eclips at sunset (Single)        

African leopard (Panthera pardus pardus) at Lake Nakuru National Park, Kenya

Achim

by Jelle van Leest