I hate October, I hate feeling lonely, I hate having sxicidxl thoughts, I hate being disappointed, I hate the memories that this month brings, it's disgusting.

When the other person keeps the conversation going is just 👌😖

(I normally don't send many messages or long ones because I've known by experience that some people feel overwhelmed and stop talking lol so this makes me feel that they are actually interested :''''))

Me sending a normal text to people I have had scenarios with in my head: *pretend you didn't have them, be cool*

My head: Type I love you at the end, TYPE IT.

Me: *changing in my room with my door opened because my cousin and I are comfortable with each other*

Me: *hears steps, it's her so I'll keep going*

...

Me: *looks up and my impossible crush is right in front of me to go to the restroom*

Me: ashfkfndllf *runs to the other side of the room so she can't see me while feeling very very embarrassed 😳*

This song will forever remind me of her... Because we listened to it together in her car 😭💖

It's been so long since I felt such a strong connection with someone... I can't describe how it feels like but it makes me think of the "what if we..." kind of stuff.

I am falling for someone who is not meant to be, unfortunately... but wow, she is so amazing...

I turned from "This could be us but you're playing" to "One day I'll have my very own HC at my side" :3

Birb! (?) \o/ 🐦 Today I went out for a long walk since my back has been hurting me more than before (perhaps due to the cold weather) and one of my years resolutions is to continue exercising. So I'll try to stop being a shut-in otaku for once and go out. My main inspiration to do this is looking at birds, taking pictures of them and go back home to identify them with the bird guides I own. I believe this boy is a Common Yellowthroat (Geothlypis trichas) or "Mascarita común". It's such a cute bird, and perhaps it will give me motivation to start painting! ❤️ . . . #birds https://www.instagram.com/p/CJm2JzWF4AT/?igshid=jhpgbx4nlz27

I'm gonna send this picture to this person, either way I know my other two friends are going to react quicker cuz they're girls and stuff.

Me: *Sends picture* they're not going to see this or just going to leave me on read lol

*Other person replies lightning fast*

*Sends me a cute message*

Me: *Pikachu surprised face but blushing furiously* I was... Not expecting that... Neon.exe stopped working...

A Black-necked stilt or Candelero americano/Monjita americana (Himantopus mexicanus) casually walking around in the lake ❤️🐦 Also, please ignore the lady humming Lost on You in the background lol 😂 . . . #birds #stilt #lake https://www.instagram.com/p/CJ4Dsecl2z8/?igshid=5fbd5r0kqjzr

Why am I so nervous? Oh right, I had many scenarios in my head with this person and I'm constantly dreaming about them lol 🤡