Bitches be turning into a blushing puddle as soon as you call them any pet name. It's me I'm bitches

baby shark

Reblogging just for this man’s laugh. Look at him, he’s so happy.

Source

Video of Tama

Follow Ultrafacts for more facts

The picture in the background of the second one

Tama is boss

THE TRAINS HAVE CARTOON TAMAS ON THEM

Sad update everyone, Tama recently passed away… An estimated 3,000 people, including railway officials, attended Tama the cat’s funeral on Sunday, days after she died of heart failure aged 16. [x]

For those who haven’t read articles about it, the local shrine elevated her to a god. She’s now the Eternal Stationmaster and patron god of the station.

Beautiful.

Now I’m crying thanks

and a new cat was hired right?

yep! her name is Nitama (essentially ”second tama” or “tama II”) and she served under Tama as an apprentice before being appointed her deputy

she works very hard

Everytime this crosses my dash, I reblog. It is the law.

Law

I’m crying at 11pm over train cats

Nitama, already now a mature cat (born 2010), has a protege named Yontama (fourth Tama, b. 2016).  There is no information available for either the physical befellment or tragic self-disgrace which has removed Santama from contention.

^Nitama majestic, and below with Yontama

Yontama.

a legacy

okay but actually what happened to santama (or sun-tama-tama, which is her name because it’s a pun on santama) was that she was basically sent to train for the position in okayama and they liked her so much they refused to send her back

Every time I see this post there’s new info and it gets better

Castles

men in greek mythology? scoundrels. just terrible. woeful social skills. murderers. kidnappers. violent misogynists. most of them… never described as handsome so we have to assume they were ugly. 

narcissus? unproblematic. beacon of transformative self love. king of the swerve. gay icon. couldn’t recognize his reflection but neither can my dog, we aren’t holding that against him.

Narcissus wrote this

I refuse to believe Narcissus could read.

i’ve been thinking about this response for the better part of 2 hours and it hasn’t gotten less hysterically funny to me

so the thing about my family is that we have two ancestors on my dad’s side who were buried in france, where I currently live. one died in the spanish civil war, and one died prior doing…we don’t know what. but he somehow managed to get buried in père lachaise. 

so anyhow, my gran sends me a message like “pls put flowers on ur uncle samuel’s grave because he’s gone over a century with none and it will make the ghost mad if he hasn’t already” because my family spends time in europe but never long enough to go all the way to père lachaise and give ya boy samuel jr. his death rites. so im like “ok gran I can do that” bc im a good grandson and you do not fuck with gran she doesn’t DESERVE THAT 

i figure out which plot he’s on and ask someone specifically where you can find uncle samuel jr. and they tell me where and so I arrive at the junction and. 

HE GONE. 

WHERE DID YOU GO UNCLE SAMUEL. 

*celine dion’s smash hit “my heart will go on” playing in the distance* 

in other words either someone stole my entire great great uncle samuel or he has risen again, ready to party in paris for all of eternity. 

You’re pretty chill about a corpse disappearing.

My guy, my dude, he’s been dead since 1851. He could be anywhere. He does what he wants.

My boyfriend just woke up, mostly still asleep and told me “don’t worry, it’s getting better” in a heavy, American accent, which is unusual for an Australian man.

“Why are you American?” I asked, to which I got:

“Sorry, it’s getting better” in a stereotypical posh English accent.

“Why are you English?” I asked, amused.

“What is he normally?” He managed to ask.

“He? You’re not anyone else, you’re you.”

“Ugh, me” was the last thing he said, in a right proper Aussie accent before he fell back into proper sleep.

Bitch just thwarted a ghost possession by judging his accents

heartbreaking: local cat has never been fed in entire life, says local cat

sources close to cat claim cat may have actually been fed between four to six hours ago. these claims are still under investigation.

Panda paradise via /r/redpandas

A single mom moves into a new apartment with her young son, only to find out it’s inhabited by a poltergeist. At first she’s spooked, but comes to realize that the poltergeist is helping to raise her son.

I’d watch it.

It’s like ‘The Others’, except that everyone just kind of… gets used to seeing each other. There are two families sharing one house, and okay, one family is a bit dead, but they’re all figuring things out as they go and it’s super handy to have a spare parent or two around.

“Mom, I’m home!” 

“She’s out shopping, go do your homework.”

“Aunt Ingrid, they didn’t even HAVE homework when you were alive, why are you BUGGING me - “ 

“When I was alive we churned butter instead of our mother going to the store to buy it, do you want to learn how to churn butter?”

“Fine, okay, homework it is.” 

“David, don’t walk through the walls.”

“Opening the door is too hard.”

“Then walk through the DOOR like your sister. Respect the conventions at least.”

“Fiiiiiinnne…” 

“Mom, what are you doing?”

“Fixing the fence.” 

“Uncle Roger, are you possessing my mom?”

“We tried just having me tell her how to do it, but it was taking too long and she got frustrated.” 

“It’s WEIRD, though.”

“Do you want to do this?”

“No, I - “

“Too late. Come and learn how to fix this. You’re the man of the house now.”

“NOBODY SAYS THAT ANY MORE, UNCLE ROGER.”

“Did you have a fight with David?”

“No.”

“Then why are you both making that face?”

“There’s no FACE.”

“That’s what he said.” 

“We didn’t have a FIGHT, okay…”

“Aunt Ingrid is worried, she says he’s been moping all morning. He’s barely visible half the time.” 

“Look, we didn’t have a fight, I just asked him how he died and then it got weird.” 

“STEVE YOU DO NOT ASK PEOPLE HOW THEY DIED THAT IS SO RUDE.” 

“Mom, it came up, okay, it wasn’t just out of nowhere!”

“YOU APOLOGIZE RIGHT NOW.” 

* 

“Steve! David! Isobel! Who broke this vase?”

“Meteor did it.”

“It was not the dog! Which one of you was throwing things in the house?”

“No, really, Mom, it was Meteor.”

“And how did the dog get up on the mantlepiece?”

“Uh…”

“ISOBEL WERE YOU LEVITATING THE DOG AGAIN?”

“This is completely inaccurate.” 

“Roger…”

“I mean, look at those clothes. I’ve never seen *anyone* dressed like that.”

“They weren’t very careful about accurate costuming in these old movies.”

“I read ALL the Sherlock Holmes stories when they were first published and I ASSURE you he was a GENTLEMAN, not like - “

“Roger, will you just let us watch the moving pictures in peace?”

“But they’re WRONG.”

“We don’t care. Shush.”

*Roger mutters about bossy women and levitates popcorn*

“Steve, what happened to your face?”

“I got into a fight.” 

“I would surmise from your bruises that you lost.”

“I always lose.”

“Oh, we can’t have that! Come, I will teach you the manly art of fisticuffs.”

“ROGER NO.”

“Aunt Ingrid, can you teach me how to make pie?”

“Of course I can… why? I know boys do a lot of things now that girls used to, I understand that, but why pie?”

“I like pie.”

“I can make you a pie if you just want to eat pie.”

“… Ava likes pie too.”

“That girl who lives down the street?”

“Yeah…”

“Then I’ll help you make the pie. What kind?”

“She likes cherry.” 

This is beautiful. I love it!

gender: addams

why do so many “icarus and the sun” artworks and stories portray the sun as a woman? do y’all know who controlled the sun? apollo. icarus is gay as fuck, y’all.

Sometimes it was helios, not Apollo. Icarus was still gay as fuck

“Icarus we just escaped prison don’t ruin it by flying too close to the sun”

[Icarus already fucking launching himself across the sky for the sake of some godly dick]

woops

Guy getting himself killed to get some godly dick is propably the most Greek thing to ever happen in mythology

I showed my friend this and he goes “Icarus want dat Dickarus