Some Thoughts

So loud. Hands over ears.

Eyes shut tight.

it's just TOO much. 

tired of fighting. 

free me and let me run.

i want to breathe. 

let me go. 

hello again

College has been rough. As it is currently 3:20, and I'm still up. I don't know how to say this lightly, but this whole week, I've seen God working in me. He actually answered 3 of my prayers consecutively within like the whole week. Everything has been hard, like balancing hanging out with friends and then studying for stuff that I'm not even sure about. Throughout this past week, I've been reminded randomly to rely on Him because He will make your path straight. Growing up, people always talk about spiritual gifts and your talents. I never felt like I really had one. However, I've learned to see how God has blessed me in certain ways that maybe other people aren't blessed in. I may not be able to play an instrument perfectly or sing melodiously like many others, but I've been able to pull a couple people to church. I guess scrapbooking is kind of a skill. I don't know much but I know I talk a lot, and I'm usually able to bring up Christ in a conversation. :) 

Boys are crazy and fun, and the beginning of the school year didn't start too well (boy wise) but right now, I'm enjoying just being able to be me and bond with girls. I've made a couple guy friends and I'm growing closer to them, but I honestly see most of them as brothers. 

I'm really glad God paired me with Esther. She's a great rooommate and we work really well together. We've shared many memories already, and I can't wait for more to come.

I miss a lot of my friends who aren' here with me. I feel like distance can separate many, but in the end, if you can stick it out, it proves how close you were/are. 

I'm so excited to go home. I do miss my family and my bed and everything home. 

<3 

One lie and an empty promise

One lie: I am perfectly happy with who I am and what I look like

Two lessons: 

1. Don't take anyone for granted. because they could be gone the next day. 

2. If you have to stop and evaluate why you're friends with someone.... they probably aren't worth being your friend

Three flaws: 

1. I care about stuff way too much

2. I don't floss everyday

3. I hate how I have to be the bigger person all the time. 

the house that built me

- The House that Built Me - Miranda Lambert

After meeting up with Taylor, Jordan, Meredith, Jenny, and Tina today, I suddenly felt really sad because most of them are leaving tomorrow. When I heard "the house that built me" by Miranda Lambert on the radio for the first time, I thought of how I've always wanted to go back and visit my first house in Houston. I've always told myself that I would go back before I leave for college, and today seemed like a perfect day to do so. We moved into that house as the first owner when I was 5, and we moved out when I was in 6th grade. So, after eating at Fuddruckers, I drove back to my neighborhood. Thankfully, someone was in before me so I could get through the gates and once I laid eyes on my old house, I just started breaking down in tears. A rush of bittersweet memories poured through my head, and although I didn't know who lived there now, I knew I had to ring the doorbell and just try to go inside.  I felt kind of foolish when I stood there explaining how this was my first house and I had to see my old house before I left for college. Interestingly enough, the people who live there were the ones who bought it from us. The man remembered me. The daughter attends UT and is in Natural Sciences. :) She told me she actually did the same thing before she left for college and understood why I wanted to see my house again. They allowed me to walk through the house. Although they installed wooden floors, got a swimming pool, and painted some rooms, most of it was still the same. The green marbled fireplace reminded me that I was the one who chose that color. My HUGE HUGE gameroom seemed much smaller, but I just remembered so muchh. All the good and bad times that built me. It's funny how you can be so attached to things when you are younger and how those memories stick with you. I'm happy for my house, as silly as that sounds. 

I'm going to miss Houston. I know I'm not going far because Austin is pretty close, but I feel like after today, I'm just a a little more ready to go leave home. 

a year without rain

Summer is officially ending. I have a little over ten days left. Pretty sad. I don't know what I'm supposed to be thinking. I think i'm really nervous, but it's more of a mental thing. I've had some random things on my mind, so I'll just tell it to the world for now.

I can tell you that I locked my keys in my car twice this summer, I learned that prayer is really powerful, and to forgive when it may be the hardest thing to do.

I believe it's possible to fall in love again just when you thought love was gone forever. You will know when you have found the right girlfriends, and when you do, don't let them go. Sometimes, there are some people who were meant to just come into your life and go. It's okay, because you'll find ones who you were meant to be with.

There are certain aromas that stick around forever and bring back sweet memories like the natural smell of your clothes after you let them bake in the sun.

Taking the extra time to drive to someone's house far away may actually be worth it because you might just happen to learn something you never knew before. 

If you can, sleep in when it's raining. If your flip flops are worn down, go get new ones or you might slip and fall. 

Take yoga classes in the morning, it helps you focus better during the day. Crying isn't a sign of weakness; it unites your mind and soul while it physically releases your stress.

If you have a goal, go for it. Don't let anyone tell you any less than who you are. 

rusted stop signs

So, I've been to Asia and some other areas where it certainly is not as comfortable as home. And suddenly, I fly to an area....that is definitely NOT very homelike at all. We're living with some friends of my grandparents at this church place (just for the night). My grandparents used to live here 20 years ago, when my grandfather worked here for the government. The bathrooms smell so bad, and the neighborhoods are kinda ghetto. There are no McDonalds, Walmart, ....no Traffic lights.... one rusted stop sign. I dont' mean to sound like a brat, but I guess in a way I do live like like one. Sad, but true. The opportunities are all there back home, and it takes moments like these to make us appreciate all that we have. I walked past an orphanage yesterday and saw a bunch of children playing out in the playground with basically no supervision. A couple boys were picking up the sand and throwing it out. I shook my head at them but smiled. It's sad to think once they turn 18, they won't really have any skills to help them move up and get a stable job that will earn them more than $50 a week. I wish I could come back and do something. Thank God for everything I have.

I did, however, go to the Belize zoo and saw a couple jaguars. It was really interesting, nothing like the Houston zoo, where the animals are all cooped up boringly behind bars. I'm going to go off to San Pedro today via water taxi. San Pedro is more of a touristy place. I miss all my friends. Hopefully, it'll be fun. :)

off to the carribeans!

hello. i should probably finish packing as it is... 2:16 AM and i am leaving for Belize at 5 AM. 

i've been so caught up with traveling, school, and making sure everything in my dorm room is monogrammed and matching that i haven't really tumbled haha. anyway, i did a million surveys last summer. here's just one for kicks!

What traits are most important to you in your significant other?

probably patience and being a good listener. funny and a good heart :) 

Would you rather be burned alive or freeze to death?

whichever death is faster. 

Do you live in a fantasy world or in reality?

hmm. well, i think half the time my mind is in a fantasy world. good things i have a couple friends who always bring me back down to earth. 

Are you a straight shooter or do you beat around the bush?

haha beat around the bush

If you were stuck on a desert island what 2 famous people (1 male, 1 female) would you choose to be with you?

1. Shirley Temple- we could see "Animal Crackers in my soup" all day long! jk probably Angelina Jolie or Audrey Hepburn

2. Probably one of the guys from Dancing with the Stars. We could dance everyday!!

If you found a million dollar lottery ticket with no name on it would you cash it in?

No, I would be a good person and turn it in. then, i'd hope they'll give me a share of it. 

If you could be any Disney character which one would you be?

probably Meeko from Pocohontas. Or, I'd be the girl from Tangled because she's kinda ADD like me.  

What is your favorite food smell?

thats hard. probably apple pie or some pasta dish?

What odd smells do you like?

odd? uhm they're not odd really... cucumbers?

What smells turn you on?

hahaha idk about "turns me on" but i like certain cologne smells.

What smells turn you off?

dirty feet and super bad body odor. gasdfds eww. 

What traits turn you off in other people?

snobbery and selfishness

What does your name mean?

Grace of God? 

What are your strengths?

my ability to reach out to others in need.

What are your weaknesses?

my loved ones? and maybe sometimes my body shape?

What is a huge turn on for you?

a simple smile :) and a nice phonecall.

What animal would best describe you?

a wombat. jk i just kinda want one. maybe a flamingo. aren't they weird creatures?

What would be the perfect gift someone could get you?

as of currently, maybe college money? haha or the Slice Elite machine! or MAC brushes! or.... maybe a couple ppl who wanna invest in a bakery that i wanna start up. 

If you could live off of 3 foods what would they be?

1. ice cream

2. grandma's noodles

3. gummy bears 

If you could be a mythical creature what would it be?

1. unicorn. duhh 

What do you do when no one else is looking?

i sing and day dream

What is your midnight snack weakness?

cereal/ ice cream

Do you wear underwear?

duhh. 

Would you prefer to be hot or cold in bed?

uhm. hot because i can always take the covers off. 

Define Transition

noun1.movement, passage, or change from one position, state,stage, subject, concept, etc., to another; change: thetransition from adolescence to adulthood. Orientation was okay. I met some great people, but this is going to be very difficult. I don't know why I'm not actually that excited. Maybe I just expected too much. 

vitamin water --> sugar water

http://healthy-eating.fitsugar.com/Truth-About-Vitamin-Water-541747