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A Brief Treatise on the Basics of Longsword Swordsmanship in the German Tradition
By Rosie Rockwell

To get a very basic level of proficiency in longsword, there are a few things you need to learn and practice:

Grip, Guards, Strikes, Footwork, Tempo/Measure, and Edge Alignment.

Grip:

longsword has three main grips, ignoring halfswording, the mordschlag, and techniques that have you grasp the blade:

You have your standard hammer grip, the intuitive one where your edge is forward in line with your knuckles, dominant hand over non-dominant with the false or second edge facing you. This is your defensive grip, used for your static blocks, as well as Pflug guard. Vorn Tag, Lang Ort, and Alber can also be held in hammer grip, and can be used in handshake grip for offense.

The second grip is the handshake grip. This is similar to the hammer grip, but you shift your grip so the blade moves forward about 20⁰, gripping the hilt between your thumb and the side of your index finger, with the remaining fingers still gripping the hilt. The handshake grip is a more offensive grip, used to perform your standard cuts and thrusts, providing better biomechanical advantage and range when following through, and preventing you from breaking your wrist when performing or landing a hard thrust.

AVOID DELIVERING THRUSTS WHILE IN HAMMER GRIP. YOU RISK BREAKING YOUR WRIST VIA HYPEREXTENSION.

The difference between handshake grip and hammer grip is small yet important, and changing between these two grips is easy, quick, and will become 100% natural as you familiarize yourself with handling a sword and improving your swordsmanship.

That said, its ok if you cant always get it right in the heat of sparring. You can still block while in handshake grip, and you can still execute a cut while in hammer grip (just dont thrust!) Handshake grip has weaker defensive structure and retention, while hammer grip has shorter range and weaker follow through. As long as you keep practicing correct form, it will become muscle memory.

The thumb grip involves turning the blade 90⁰ and placing the thumb of your dominant hand against the side of your crossguard, in line with the flat of the blade. This grip allows you to cut and block with wrist rotation, allowing use of the false edge. Using your non dominant hand (underneath) with a levering action around your dominant hand can generate impressive amounts of power, just be mindful of your Edge Alignment.

Thumb grip is used for Ochs guard. it can also be used in Pflug, though doing so only changes your hand position, not the blade orientation. Thumb grip is used to perform the Schielhau, the Zwerchau, and the Krumphau, all of which can be performed with both edges.

Guards:

German longsword has 4 main guards; Vorn tag (to the roof), Ochs (ox), Pflug (plow), and Alber (fool's guard). There are a few others besides these 4, but they're the most basic, provide protection for the lines you're likely to be attacked on, and the Meisterhau, or mastercuts, flow to and from each of those guards, and more often than not flows through Lang Ort as well

YOU MUST ALWAYS MAINTAIN A GUARD DURING COMBAT, EVEN AFTER LANDING A STRIKE. NO EXCEPTIONS. Failure to maintain and return to a guard position will result in YOU getting HIT BY THE OPPONENT'S AFTERBLOW.

The first of the 4 main guards is Vorn Tag, translated literally as "to the roof." From your stance, vorn tag is basically any time you hold your sword overhead, usually slightly over your Left or Right shoulder. However, you can wind yourself back further into whats often called Zornhut, or Wrath stance to increase the amount of energy you can deliver into your strike, but it somewhat limits your options to a full power Zornhau, especially as a beginner*.

Vorn Tag operates under the philosophy "offense is the best defense". It leaves your body wide open, but gives you a lot of potential energy in order to deliver a devastating strike, to win you the Vorshlag (first blood), increasing your chances of winning the duel or even dispatching your foe outright. As such, all 5 of the meisterhau can be performed from Vorn Tag relatively smoothly, as well as thumb grip techniques being available. Vorn Tag also has a certain degree of intimidation factor or psychological warfare. Advancing while in Vorn Tag basically communicates to your opponent,

'I can hit you. Hard. I will hit you. Hard. If you cant get me out of this, if you arent prepared to deal with this, if you try to stab me or go for my legs or do anything, and my sword is still right here, you will get hit. Hard.'

however this terror factor is not to be used as a crutch, but a bluff. A veteran swordsman knows how to deal with vorn tag or zornhut, and a double hit, afterblow, or suicidal attack will get you killed in a real fight.

Alber, or "fool's guard," is a position where you have your sword held low in front of you, often with the crossguard vertical, in either hammer grip, handshake grip, or thumb grip, pointed near the ground, but NOT touching the ground. It is named such because you'd have to be a fool to try and defend yourself with it, as it covers next to nothing and has very little stored energy to release.

Instead, Alber acts as a gambit, inviting an enemy to attack and overextend themselves, giving you the opportunity for a quick and decisive counterblow.

Alber is a rest position, no harder to maintain than simply holding onto your sword, and allows you access to the krumphau, a few false edge undercuts, very quick access to lang ort by simply throwing your point back up at your foe, and easy transitions to all guard positions, with the added caveat that moving your blade all the way across your body to ochs or vorn tag is slower than doing that from pflug or Lang Ort.

I am not an expert or even a highly trained swordsman by any means, but i would say that alber (and Vorn Tag to a lesser extent) is especially reliant on deft footwork, being that you invite a foe to attack, defend against the hit by voiding, parrying, and/or counterattacking during their attack/vulnerability.

[Image ID: a page from the 15th century german manuscript Fechtbuch by Paulus Kal, showing two figures in fighting stances demonstrating sword guards. The left is dressed entirely in pink with a hat, and in the "fool's guard," Alber, with the sword held low, pointing towards the feet. The one on the right is wearing a blue outfit with pink sleeves and accents, a beard, and curly grey shoulder-length hair. He is holding the "Roof guard," Vorn Tag with the sword raised overhead, ready to execute a Zornhau, End ID]

Despite what is shown in the above image, I do not like to hold the sword directly vertically in Vorn Tag, but with some degree of backward angle to the tip, putting the pommel somewhat forward. Holding the sword upright like HE-MAN is tiring, and the backwards tilt allows a bit more power and angular momentum to be generated, as well as giving access to a strong pommel strike to the face, should a foe somehow get within that range without stabbing you.

Ochs, or ox guard is a high guard performed by assuming a thumb grip with your hands near and slightly above your head to either your left or right side. Ochs is NOT straight down the middle, but offset to the side and slightly above. Additionally, your point should be engaged and facing the enemy, and the crossguard shouId be at a 30⁰ angle with the edge facing outward. So that your edge can be quickly aligned to deliver a zwerchau, schielhau, scheitelhau, or krumphau. Keeping the point engaged towards the enemy prevents them from closing in too easily, and allows you to perform a quick high thrust as well. Additionally, the fact that the blade is held nearly horizontally in a thumb grip means that a successful thrust to the chest is more likely to slip between the ribs, or even the cervical vertebrae of an adversary.

In order to protect your head and even your upper body, your Ochs guard needs to cover your foe's lines of attack to your head and upper body, by placing your sword in between their angle of attack and your body. If they can touch your shoulder or body before touching your sword, you arent in position. This is true for most all guard positions, the key is to cover yourself from your opponent's strikes, while delivering your own in such a way that you are still covered from your foe's attack. It is also good practice to keep your ochs guard some distance out from your body, in order to have good structure, while still covering your openings. If the sword is too close to you when performing a static block, you risk getting hit and cut by your own blade. Learning the guards close is fine, but being able to hold guards and block further out is a key step towards mastery.

Pflug, or "plow guard" is the counterpart of ochs, a low guard with the hands holding the sword by the hip, with the crossguard vertical, the point engaged and aimed towards the foe's chest or eyes. This guard position is easy as well as relatively comfortable to maintain, can quickly switch sides to defend your other flank, as well as being able to rapidly transition to Ochs on either side. and can be used with both hammer grip or thumb grip, though I find thumb grip more comfortable. Pflug allows quick access to body thrusts, as well as Krumphau, Scheitelhau, Zwerchau, and several false edge cuts and rising undercuts im not discussing here because this is getting long enough already.

[Image ID: another page from the 15th century german manuscript Fechtbuch by Paulus Kal, showing the same two figures in fighting stances demonstrating sword guards. The pink-clad swordsman on the left is holding the "ox guard," Ochs on his right side, with the sword held at head level, pointed at the foe, and the hands crossed. The swordsman on the right is holding the "plow guard," Pflug on his left side, with the hilt near his hip, and the tip aimed at the pink swordsman's head. He has traded his blue overtop for a green shirt, and appears to have been injured in the cheek. End ID]

An additional guard is Lang ort, or "Long Point" which is exactly what it sounds like: hold your sword out in front of you, arms relaxed and slightly bent, with the point on the Center Line, pointed at your foe's upper body or eyes. You can also use it to enter the Bind, where your sword is in contact with your adversary's, contesting the Center Line.

I'm not going into too much detail on binding or winding or circling/countercircling your foe's blade, but in short, manually taking Long Point makes it a defensive, keep-away position that has few readily available offensive options besides thrusting, scheitelhau, and push/pull cuts, should an enemy get past your point but end up against your edge.

With all of this said, you should also be aware that lang ort is not purely a guard or stance, but the terminal point of nearly every strike, past which you start to overcommit and become briefly vulnerable. The sword can be in various different positions while still qualifying as Lang Ort; the Lang Ort of a Zornhau will be different from the Lang Ort from a Zwerchau, or even a Krumphau, and their point plavement can vary based on the target of the original cut, but they are all still Lang Ort.

Lastly, remember to periodically change your guard position during a duel. The longer you hold any one position, the longer your foe has to formulate a plan to strike at your openings and execute upon it. Do not do so predictably or haphazardly, but adaptively, taking the best guard to strike at your foe's openings (or imminent openings) while covering yourself from their most likely angles of attack.

Looking between your foe's guard, sword position, and where they are looking is a good way to do calculate this and decide your next move, but make sure to stay on your guard.

If you intentionally stay in a guard for longer than is reasonable, make sure you have a plan, and two or three backup plans to respond to what your foe may do.

The 5 Meisterhau, or Master Cuts:

This is the fun part, where i explain the five mastercuts, or secret strikes, of Johannes Liechtenauer, and tell you how to perform them. The first is the most intuitive, and the one you're likely most familiar with, the Zornhau.

The Zornhau, or "wrath strike" is a simple oberhau (overcut) in the hammer grip, starting from Vorn Tag or Zornhut, ending in alber on the opposite side. This is a powerful, cross body diagonal strike, often performed with a triangle step, both forward and off the center line.

The zornhau is intended to be a killing blow, but it is NOT a vertical overhead slam, it crosses from the shoulder to the hip, and ends in alber on the opposite side. It can target the entire upper body, as well as can be used to cut into an opponent's strike, and can even be used to counter itself; by stepping offline and meeting their zornhau with the lower portion of your blade, you can continue your cut into their head. Make sure your edge alignment is good, or your cut will not deal damage like it should. Additionally, I prefer to pull back from alber into pflug or another, more defensive, position as soon as the cut is finished in order to cover myself from an opponent's counterblow.

*Advanced fencers are able to wind the sword all the way back, against their back, into a very deep zornhut, which technically allows one to parry a blow to the back and counter, as well as being able to deliver an especially sneaky thrust, literally behind the back. However, any competent swordsman will deliver a thrust to the back or side against this stance, and you have little recourse to defend yourself. As a beginner, do not try this and never give the opponent your back.
[Image ID: a page from the 15th century german manuscript Fechtbuch by Paulus Kal, showing two figures in fighting stances demonstrating the zornhau. The swordsman on the left is the same pink-clad one, demonstrating a zornhau, or "wrath strike," to the head using a handshake grip. His arms are noticably bent, and his stance is retracted, so the cut is intentionally just short of his opponent. the point is only inches from the other swordsman's face. This doubles as a depiction of Lang Ort, showing the terminal point of the zornhau, with the sword extended and threatening his foe. The second swordsman is different, wearing a light blue top with striped under-sleeves, darker blue pants, and curly light grey hair. His sword is held by his stomach in a handshake grip, but the tip is at a 45⁰ angle in the air. He does not appear to be in a strong guard, or threatening the pink swordsman with his technique. End ID]

Next up is the Scheitelhau, or "crown strike" this is your longest range strike that is not a lunge. With a handshake grip, from any guard position, push your shoulders forward and fully extend your arms at head height, sort of like superman. Simultaneously, you push with your front hand and pull with the back hand, bringing the blade down upon your foe's head with a sort of snapping motion, as you pull your stomach and the rest of your body as far back as you can, to avoid damage. When performed with a backstep, it's a decent option to cover your retreat, though you need to transition into another guard asap. Even if it hits, it doesnt end in a strong guard position, so you need to either take up an effective guard, or prevent the counterattack from occuring in the first place.

The scheitelhau can also be used as a thrusting action by driving the tip forward, with your arms and shoulders, rather than snapping the blade down. It works especially well when combined with a step.

A useful and deceptive example of this technique starts with the blade held in Lang Ort, while at long range and out of measure. From there, carefully advance while retracting your guard to pflug, keeping the blade in the same point in space to make it look like you havent moved at all. If performed correctly, your opponent's gaze will have been fixated on the point of your blade, not your body. They believe that they are not in danger, while you have entered measure and coiled yourself up to deliver a strike. Then, once within measure, take a step forward and offline, while delivering a scheitel-thrust to your opponents sword shoulder. This example is an extreme range technique that is reliant on deception, and therefore should not be over used. A successful scheitel-thrust to the sword-shoulder (or any solid thrust really) will pin your foe's sword arm, rendering them unable to retaliate and preventing an afterblow from occuring. Just take care not to overuse this maneuver or run onto your opponent's point when performing this technique.

[Image ID: an illustration of two swordsmen in multicolored landsknecht outfits engaged in combat. The swordsman on the left has a short beard covering his square jaw, sports a puffy yellow shirt with a green collar, with red sleeves and a red hat, as well as frilled blue shorts over blue and white, vertically striped leggings. He has a forward leaning front stance, and holds his sword at his side and behind him, likely in preparation to perform an undercut. The swordsman on the right has short brown hair, is wearing a lighter weight green shirt, with black and yellow vertically striped leggings, has a dagger on his hip, and is wearing a codpiece. He is in a strong front stance with his body upright, and has successfully performed a scheitelhau to his opponent's head. His blade is touching his opponent's cap, and is about to hew into his adversary's skull. No injury is depicted. End ID]

Next, we have the Zwerchau, or "crosswise cut". This is a fun cut to perform, and the one that starts to separate the people who want to learn swordsmanship versus the people who are content to wildly swing a sharp object.

Most often performed from ochs, the zwerchau requires the thumb grip, is deceptively easy to perform, and can be performed in rapid succession, so long as your edge alignment is correct, though it isnt always wise to do so.

From ochs, make sure your wrist is perpendicular to the edge of the blade, in a proper thumb grip. If misaligned, the cut will not cut, and you will get hit. Then, simply cross or uncross your wrists using a push-pull levering action to perform the zwerchau and end in ochs on the other side.

If performed from the dominant side ochs guard, uncross your wrists. If performed from the weak side, cross them.

The zwerchau can be rapidly executed on alternating sides, and can target low as well as high, making it difficult to defend against, so long as your edge stays aligned and you keep your guard up. However, performing this so called "zwerc-copter," back to back to back zwerchaus, is NOT recommended in a serious fight, due to it being predictable and leaving you wide open for a counterattack.

[Image ID: a page from the 15th century german manuscript Fechtbuch by Paulus Kal, showing the same two figures as depicted in other pages from Fechtbuch, both in fighting stances and performing the zwerchau against each other. The swordsman on the left is bearded with curly grey-brown hair and a beard. He wears a simple red long sleeve shirt and brown pants. The bearded swordsman is performing a zwerchau from left to right, with his hands crossed, but his technique is blocked by the pink swordsman's own zwerchau, thrown right to left, with his hands uncrossed Both swords are held overhead, and cross behind the two figures, but the tip of pink swordsman's zwerchau appears to intersect with the left elbow of the bearded swordsman. No injury is otherwise depicted. End ID]

Next is the scheilhau, or "squinting cut". This is by far the trickiest and most complec of the meisterhau to perform, due to the unintuitive biomechanics involved. The schielhau is performed by throwing a cut and rolling your arms/the blade upon contact with the opponents sword, then hitting your target with the reverse edge. The mechanical advantage of this rolling action is enough to displace your foe's blade just enough to break the guard and hit them.

You can think of it as 3 mini actions, performed in a single beat: cut, roll, false edge cut.

The schielhau always strikes with the reverse edge, and is always performed from the dominant side, ending in Alber, Lang Ort, or sometimes Pflug. I usually prefer to pull back to pflug, especially if not following up in order to re-enter a safer position and cover my openings, but I'm not an expert.

A well timed and executed schielhau will often displace the foe's blade and strike while breaking the enemy's guard.

Take care while executing a schielhau and attempting to break an opponent's guard. It may be tempting to strike at maximum power and blow through your foe's guard, but if your opponent defends themselves effectively, overcommitting to a strike leaves you vulnerable to a counterblow. As always, edge alignment is key, though this is easily my worst cut, and the most complex of the meisterhau. Practice makes perfect!

[Image ID: An illustration from a manuscript by Paulus Hector Mair depicting two swordsmen in ornate landsknecht outfits, engaged in combat. The right swordsman has short brown hair, a black doublet with orange sleeves, and golden plunderhosen, a type of medieval pants, common with the landsknecht mercenaries, that are puffy around the thighs and near skin tight below the knee. The left swordsman is older and has brown hair and a beard. he is wearing a light yellow doublet with red sleeves and detailing, as well as green/red split color plunderhosen, with one color for each leg. The right swordsman is performing an overcut that has been thwarted by the schielhau of the left swordsman. The left swordsman has his sword horizontally over the right shoulder of the right swordsman at head height, with his right hand gripping it from underneath. His left hand is gripping the pommel, preparing to lever the sword blade downwards and perform the cut. No injury is depicted. End ID]

Last, but certainly not least, is the venerable Krumphau, or "crooked cut". If the zwerchau is performed on the X axis, the krumphau is performed on the Z axis, or the frontal plane. Though it can be angled left, right, up, or down in order to beat or attack from different angles, it still strikes along a frontal plane.

Krumphau can be performed from just about any guard, and uses that identical thumb grip push pull levering action of the last two strikes. Combined with an offline, inward step, or triangle step, the krumphau beats down the opponents sword, breaks the guard, and often hits the hand or arm when performed at the right distance with the right timing and footwork. With offline movement, the krumphau can even be used to attack directly against a flanked opponent.

[Image ID: a page from the 15th century german manuscript Fechtbuch by Paulus Kal, showing the same pink swordsman, on the left, performing a krumphau against the hands of a second swordsman, different from the others, who is on the right. This new swordsman has short grey hair, wears a blue doublet with red details, and light green pants. His sword is held by his stomach, with the point not threatening the pink swordsman. The pink swordsman has stepped offline to his right side (the opponent's left) and has delivered a krumphau to his left side with his wrists crossed. The tip of his sword intersects with the left hand of his foe, but no injury is otherwise shown. End ID]
Footwork: evasion, structure, and power

Footwork is an important part of any martial art, longsword is no exception. Proper footwork allows you additional control over the entire engagement; from controlling the speed and distance between you and your foe, moving in and out to strike and retreat (or vice versa), to evasive offline maneuvers to put you in a better position to flank your foe, to giving you additional control and power in your cuts, thrusts, and all other techniques thanks to a strong structure from the lower body. The key is to keep a stance that is both mobile and strong, and to move at oblique angles to flank your opponent, before reorienting yourself square at your opponent.

Sadly i've yet to find a quick and dirty diagram on footwork, but you want to take yourself off your opponent's center, and put them back on your center, without crossing your feet or tripping.

The so called "Triangle Step" is just that; taking a big step, or even a controlled leap offline (and usually forward) and swiftly using the back foot to reorient yourself towards your foe and re-enter your stance in the space of a single beat or tempo. It is a useful tool in order to flank, escape being flanked, to void certain attacks on the center line, and to generally move effectively in a duel. Though it is not the only type of step you'll use, it is a necessary skill to have in order to be an effective swordsman.

Again, use the triangle step when necessary or advantageous, but not to the point of predictability, lest your opponent read your intention and preemptively throw a cut into your destination, intercepting you. This goes without saying, but moving into a connecting hostile strike massively increases the damage that you would sustain in a real fight, leading to grievous injury at best, and instant incapacitation or death at worst.

On the other hand, if your adversary moves predictably, and their sword doesnt cover them from your preferred line of attack, you can feint a strike to get them to move, and intercept their movement with your own cut, though this is easier said than done. Deception is a key part of fencing above the intermediate level, though you must make sure your techniques are clean and effective before practicing your martial deceit.

Lastly, stepping offline with one foot may be enough to evade some strikes, but your back foot and lower body may still be in danger from other strikes. Repositioning that back foot and reorienting your body removes everything from that center line, and is the only way to ensure that you've really taken yourself off your enemy's center line. That said, dont be too predictable!

Tempo, Measure, and Tactics:

There are two important terms to describe here: Tempo, and Measure.

Measure refers to whether or not your strikes or your opponents strikes are in range. If your strikes can hit your foe, you are in measure. If they cant, you are out of measure. Similarly, if your foe can hit you, you are in their measure, and if they cant, you are out of their measure. If you perform a cut or thrust out of measure, you place your body within measure for your opponent, and will likely get hit.

Additionally, there are situations when one combatant is in measure, and one combatant is out of measure. One such example of this is using a triangle step to flank your opponent's non-sword-arm side. In that case, there is a brief moment where you are out of your opponent's measure, not threatened by their sword, and they are in yours. Strike in that moment when they are out of position, before they reorient themselves to defend and counterattack. Remember to keep yourself covered against an afterblow, even if you hit.

Tempo refers to to the amount of actions that are being performed when defending and counterattacking, and the relative amount of time performing those actions take. However, it is NOT a measure of time. An exceptionally fast double tempo counter can be performed faster than a slowly executed single tempo one.

For example, if an opponent attacks with a zornhau, you perform an overhead static block to stop their strike, then step offline and deliver a zornhau of your own, that is a double tempo defense.

If an opponent throws a zornhau, and you respond with your own zornhau, intercepting their blade while driving your zornhau into their head, that is a single tempo defense.

Similarly, if an opponent thrusts, and you beat it down with a krumphau, before thrusting into their chest, that is similarly a double tempo defense.

However, if you step offline against that same thrust, and deliver your krumphau to their sword arm, that is a single tempo defense.

German longsword, especially usage of the meisterhau, places a lot of emphasis on the single tempo defense, and winning the vorschlag, or the first blood through a fluid assault of rapid attacks.

The philosophy is that getting first blood puts your foe in disadvantage, due to the fact that they are injured, and on the defensive. Keeping them on the defensive, without opening yourself up to a counterattack means that each subsequent hit reduces their effectiveness more and more, and prevents them from regaining their composure to counterattack. It was believed at the time, that a less skilled swordsman could defeat one with superior skill, should they win the vorschlag.

Winning the vorschlag is important, but it doesnt mean you can neglect your defense. Even dealing a hit doesnt mean that the foe is immediately incapacitated, or that you're safe. Often times, swordsmen would hit each other simultaneously, called a double blow, or one swordsman would hit another, and immediately be hit by the technique their adversary was performing, called an afterblow.

This sort of scenario leads to two dead swordsmen, rather than just one, which is why training the abzug, or the afterblow, is so important. When delivering a cut or thrust, you must ALWAYS return to a guard position, or move out of danger as soon as possible.

When you deal a good hit, the fight still isnt over. Keep yourself covered under guard, and move away from your foe until you're safely out of measure. If you perform a suicidal attack or let your guard down, your foe will drag you down to hell with their dying breath.

Edge alignment and timing

Keep the edge of your sword aligned with the direction of the strike. In order to train this, practice your techniques, but focus on form, structure, and keeping your edge aligned. Even if you can only get proper form and alignment at a snails pace, do not be discouraged! Practice makes perfect, slow is smooth, and smooth is fast.

Edge alignment is crucial for every strike you perform. A misaligned edge will massively decrease the effectiveness of your strikes. A blow that would've dismembered a foe will only deal a glancing wound if the alignment is off.

Lastly, timing is everything. Speed is worthless if lightning fast attacks do not land where you want them to, when you want them to. The speed of your technique is largely irrelevant, as long as you can put the blade exactly where you want it, exactly when you want it.

Timing comes with practice and experience, and you will gain that experience and instinct from sparring and watching others spar.

In the meantime, work on perforning these techniques with proper form and edge alignment, while returning to guard positions and getting used to offline movements, reorienting yourself, and being able to move in, out, and around while keeping your guard up.

This concludes me breaking down of the basics of german longsword! Training and mastering these fundamentals will make you a much better swordsman in the long run, and there is so much more to be learned after picking up the basics.

Beyond the styles of Meyer and Liechtenauer, there is Fiore and the italian masters, there are techniques from china and japan, which can be learned from. Even when the katana and jian are different from european swords, studying other techniques can allow you to modify them for your needs, and expand upon them.

Thanks for reading all of this, i wish you luck in your study of the blade, and i hope that one day we can cross blades and continue our journeys together :)

Additional Resources and Credits:

Big thanks to Logan Raymond for going over this treatise with me and providing some excellent instruction and explanation.

Additionally, check out Skallagrim, SellswordArts, and Frederico Malagutti for more fencing and swordsmanship content, with training advice, demonstrations, sparring content, sword reviews, and other generally sword focused content.

Additionally, for more historical information on swords and swordsmanship with a stronger emphasis on the history, check out Scholagladiatora on youtube. Though he's a better fencer than i am so far, I've been told to take his fencing advice with a grain of salt. History is his strong point.

And to those who are more experienced than me, or take issue with anything i've said here, please take this treatise with a grain of salt. I am still learning and by no means a veteran or master, yet wish to share what i do know with others in order to get more people into HEMA, and I figured that this is a decently accessible way to do so.

Image credits:

Fechtbuch by Paulus Kal, scanned by Munich digital library.

Fencing, the Ring, and Tournament Book by Paulus Hector Mair

Unknown source from schwertkampf-tutorials.de

Other sources:

Kunst des Fechtens: The Medieval Art of Longsword Combat, by Michael Smathers

Wiktenauer.com (various contributors)

P.S. i guess this wasnt too brief after all, being longer than the entirity of Liechtenauer's famous Recital.

P.S.S. I think i've formed a parasocial relationship with Fechtbuch Pink Guy
Thanks for reading!
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draumboosky

I had to pee really bad and o forgot that I had just sliced jalapeño peppers and the chef is looking nice at me weird because I’m pouring milk on a rag and running to the bathroom

My dick has been on fire for over an hour

I told my chef what happened and he was like “you only make that mistake about fourteen times”

He tells me this story about this time he had gotten out of a chili class in which he had been cutting habenjero peppers all class and he goes back to his dorm and starts finger blasting his girlfriend and she stars SCREECHING.

She he fukin SPRINTS to the dorm prep kitchen and gets a gallon of heavy cream and runs back to the room. He starts pouring this shit all over her Cooze right, and she’s like shoveling cream into her hole. And he’s freaking out. Like he’s so sure that this chick is don’t with him forever.

So they deal with this thing and the cream works and he’s like massaging it into her pussy for like a half an hour because you have to constantly soak it to nullify the habenjero oils or whatever. And she gets INTO IT.

She fucking CUMS

And my chef tells me this stupid ass story and looks me in the eye and says to me

“Nothing says I love you like a gallon of heavy cream in her pussy”

And I think that’s the best sentence I’ve ever heard in my entire life.

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deicide4122

Yes good story but WHY IS IT IN LIKE 8 DIFFERENT PARTS DO YOU KNOW WHAT PARAGRAPHS ARE.

ITS THIS. YOU COULD HAVE DONE THIS.

SOMETIMES PEOPLE ARE AT WORK AND CANT POST EVERYTHING AT ONE TIME FUCK OFF

its serialized. he’s a modern day dickens

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cryptotheism

Rabbi Moshe De Leon Discusses Theology With Goku - Coño Culo, 14th century

Ew this is plagiarism algorithm, not real art

This was painted in the 13th/14th century by celebrated Andalusian artist Coño Culo. It is one of the earliest historical examples we have of Goku interacting with Spaniards.

Goku: Huh, what do you mean by "ein soft?"

Rabbi Moshe ben Shem-Tov ZT"L: Haha, no Goku, it's ein sof. That means "the unending one."

Goku: Unending, huh....and that infinite oneness is God?

Rabbi Moshe ben Shem-Tov ZT"L: That's right, Goku. God before the creation of the universe.

Goku: Woah...sounds pretty strong. D'you think I could beat him in a fight?

Rabbi Moshe ben Shem-Tov ZT"L: That would be a pretty tough one, Goku, even for you!

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hobbular

Concept: the extraterrestrial ship captain approaches Human Steve after months of their service, having uncovered an Earth Artifact at great cost.

“Human Steve, I have procured this recording! The seller told me it was a rare, preserved copy of a ‘pop song’, and I wanted to present it to you as a gift of gratitude.”

Human Steve tears open the package and half smiles, half tears up - it’s one of those single-MP3 players from the late 90s, too scratched up to read the song title. He doesn’t expect it to work, but when he taps the play button, a tinny noise crackles out of the speaker.

His face falls.

“Ha ha, Agrax, very funny.”

The ship captain looks confused. “What do you mean, Human Steve?”

“Of all of the ‘pop songs’, this one? Really? Entirely on coincidence?!”

“Does this particular song have a cultural significance to you, Human Steve?”

“Yeah, it does, Agrax, it’s a–” Human Steve sighs. “You know what, it’s complicated. I’ll explain it some other time. Thanks for the gift.”

As Human Steve shuffles off down the corridor, the ship captain opens up their log and makes a careful note.

Stardate 2074.3 : Achievement accomplished. I have successfully Rickrolled Human Steve.
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smbc-comics

Ark

I'll go ahead and post this on other platforms, but let's be clear that this is a tumblr comic.

Bonus panel here: http://smbc-comics.com/comic/three-3

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voyagerprobe

Buckle up, European and Foreigner Tumblypoos, because I'm about to learn you a thing about AMERICA.

Image

You see these delectable motherflippers? These are called STATES. You stupid foreigners might not be able to wrap your head around this, but basically they're administrative subdivisions of the country.

And here's the thing: They are totally heckin' different from each other! For instance, New York:

Looks TOTALLY DIFFERENT from Kansas:

And they both look TOTALLY different from California!

So before you make fun of an American for not knowing where tiny third-world countries like "Check Republic" or "South Korea" are, maybe think about how much we have to learn about the unique regional differences in our OWN country. Maybe you should think about AMERICA more.

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