challenge: name an object no human has attempted to use sexually

ur penis

Having gay parents must be horrible

I mean you either get twice the usual amount of dad jokes or get stuck into an infinite loop of “go ask your mom”

These are the kind of gay jokes that are funny.

people who laugh so hard at their own jokes that they can’t even finish the joke because they’re laughing so hard are my favorite kind of people

Thats totally me

More of the Best #ExplainAFilmPlotBadly Tweets Part One

*sees kylo rens face* “okay but theres no resemblance to his his family wtf” *sees kylo ren acting like a little bitch* “what nvm suddenly i see the anakin”

this is the good luck tanaka

reblog in the next 15 seconds for the best luck of your life

Tanaka pls

ur either a space gay, a forest gay or an ocean gay

signs as types of gays:

space gay: gemini, virgo, scorpio, aquarius

forest gay: taurus, cancer, libra, capricorn

ocean gay: aries, leo, sagittarius, pisces

@aph-russia

Let em rip

This is a totally accurate representation of what it’s like to work at a sex shop.

100%

Other fun things to do:

Handcuff your employees together and see who can free themselves first

Dramatic readings of “erotic fiction”

Dildo duels (lightsaber noises optional but recommended)

The manic laughter

The best part is, you don’t hear any other voices on this recording. This is a person who is alone doing this.

The tweets are strong with this one (x)

Happy New Year!

Why don’t jedis turn off their opponents lightsabers by force pressing the button?

I’m laughing so hard because instead of the epic lightsaber fight they’d just be aggressively switching them on and off could you imagine

I wonder who’s cutting me off for 2016

maybe i’m still single because i didn’t forward that chain email to 17 of my closest friends 5 years ago

that’ll explain the little girl with no eyes at the end of my bed too