tortured .

Stopping in his tracks as he was about to go out the door, his spark leapt into his throat. Of course Knock Out was right, he was definitely in love with him. He knew he shouldn’t be, they were on opposing sides. But sometimes, the best feelings can be found in the most unfortunate ways. Bumblebee should’ve known that a friendship with someone he found so visually pleasing would end up with deep feelings.

Turning around to face the other mech, there was a look upon his face that normally would never be present on the brave Autobot scout’s visage. It was a sheepish look, one backed by nervous feelings, a sensation that he rarely experienced. It wasn’t like him to have feelings such as these, and he hadn’t the slightest clue how to deal with them.

“I..” His beeps were soft and careful, “do. You’re right..” He was ashamed of the fight they had just had and that it was what ultimately brought forth his true feelings. “I am in love with you, but I’m not sure what’s going to happen if we continue what we’re doing..” He took one last look as he slowly turned around, and despite what his processor was telling him, his spark hoped that Knock Out would try and stop him from leaving.

Head held between his hands as he sat on the berth, he lightly scoffed in disbelief. He wasn’t a failure? Of course he was. He had been fighting this same old war for ages and still wasn’t able to become a warrior like he always wished to be. Surely his extensive combat experience would ensure that he was able to become one, but yet it was all no use. Even rookie Smokescreen had been in the Elite Guard academy and graduated, which was something Bumblebee had never even gotten the chance to partake in himself- no matter how much he desired it. He had to face it, he would never be the warrior he wanted so desperately to be.

“How can you say that when I couldn’t even hold my own against those Decepticons? You had to back me up.”

The long tale brought forth from the newcomer was one full of destruction and agony. Of course, it wasn’t like the young scout had never seen things like that before. It was just intriguing, yet depressing, to hear tales of encounters with enemies during the ongoing war. Bumblebee even had his own war stories to tell, but the one that was just shared with him by the newcomer was particularly full of carnage.

“How did you manage to survive all of that?” Bumblebee chirped at his new acquaintance. Curiosity surely got the best of him in this case.

The young scout lay upon the cold, unforgiving ground, obviously injured. He wrapped his arm around his abdomen, cradling the seeping wound gently. Being outnumbered had proven to be a bigger challenge than he expected. Looking up at Smokescreen, he was glad to see a friendly face staring back at him, concern written over his features. He felt as if his insides had been scrambled and poured out of his abdomen. 

“No,” he grimaced as he spoke to the other, “I should have waited for you.”

The crimson medic’s servos upon his wrists tugged at his spark. Bumblebee knew that Knock Out wanted so badly for him to stay, but it was getting too risky for them to be seeing each other like this. Bumblebee hesitated, the grip on his wrists making him feel all too sad and anguished. He didn’t want to go, in fact, it was the last thing that he would ever want. But the risk was becoming too high.

“Knock Out.. I have to go. It’s not what I want, but I have to. I’ll try to see you again, okay?” Bumblebee pulled his hands away from the medic’s grip. “Optimus knows. He’s figured us out, and I fear that the Dark lord himself may be onto us. We can’t do this anymore. I promise, I’ll try to see you again one day, even if it is many eons from now. I’m so sorry.” The yellow praxian stepped back, his heart shattering. Hesitating, he waited to start to leave, hoping that Knock Out would say something that would make him stay. He had to.

The odds weren’t in Bumblebee’s favor as his shoulders and back hit the ground. Smokescreen was larger and had used his heavier body weight to tip the yellow praxian backwards and onto the floor. Optimus had sent the two young praxians to spar to burn off some pent up energy and keep their skills sharp while the team lay low. Smokescreen was larger sized and used this to his advantage to throw the other to the ground. 

This wasn’t the end of the battle, though. Bumblebee, being used to fighting larger Decepticons for most of his days, had learned that size really doesn’t matter all that much in the long run. Pressing his peds flat and upright on the floor, he launched his frame off of the floor, sending Smokescreen flying off of him and backwards. Landing with his peds upon the floor and standing completely upright, he lurched forward at his pretend foe.