Found my 53yo very-much-not-online father in the kitchen today meticulously arranging cutlery on the countertop and i was like 'what are you doing' and he looked up at me with the world's most shit-eating grin and said "Your mother told me this is how you rick-roll the Youth" and i looked over and it was fucking. Loss.jpg.

i must stress that he's never seen the original comic. My mother simply showed him the shorthand symbol and he memorized it. As far as he is aware this is just a fucking hieroglyph that deals instant psychic damage to everyone under the age of 30

*RARE* John Denver & Johnny Cash - Take Me Home Country Roads

Found this while going through my granddad’s VHS tapes and couldn’t find it anywhere online, so here it is.

Every time I’m lucky enough to have this hit my dash I listen to it, and every time I get chills all the way through.

[Video description: a grainy, full colour video of John Denver and Johnny Cash playing Country Roads together. Both are playing acoustic guitars, and they are outside, with trees and a building in the background. They sing and harmonize beautifully together. End Video description.]

Desc courtesy of @thetragicallynerdy

.....you know I would like to thank @voyoock for this reply because tbh I kind of wanted to break one of these open and taste it myself.

Just think, these stones contain the water from ancient seas from millenia ago, and a well educated scholar STILL couldn't resist their pull. Not one of us is immune to the siren call of ancient tide pods.

cracking open an old one with the boys

I recently had surgery, and at the time I came home, I had both my cat and one of my grandma's cats staying with me.

- Within hours of surgery, I wake up from a nap to my cat gently sniffing at my incisions with great alarm.

- I was not allowed to shower the first day after surgery, and the cats, seeing that The Large Cat is not observing its cleaning ritual, decided I must be gravely disabled and compensated by licking all the exposed skin on my arms, face, and legs.

- I currently have to sleep with a pillow over my abdomen because my cat insists on climbing on top of me and covering my incisions with her body while I sleep (which is very sweet but not exactly comfortable without the pillow). She also lays across me facing my bedroom door, presumably on guard for attackers who may try to harm me while I'm sleeping and injured.

That's love. 🐈‍⬛🐈❤️

cats are so very unclear on what is wrong with us but they want to help

Last time I had a really bad migraine my cat curled herself round my head and purred sympathetically, and actually stayed there through two of her normal mealtimes. It wasn't until I was able to stagger to the kitchen and grab a protein bar for myself that she gave a very small, polite miaow to the effect of "while you're up... could you get something for me too?"

If you write down the results and properly format the paper, it even counts as science!

When I was in college, there was a solid year where our lgbt group did this with two bathrooms at the end of a hall that were used by like, maybe 20 people. They would put up gendered signs and we kept stealing them. And then we started writing random things on the walls INCLUDING full word for word copies of personal ads from the back of 1980′s advocate magazines.

It got to the point where the building management was on a hunt trying to find who was doing this and we had to start hiding our faces so as to not get caught on the security cameras. Our faculty advisor came down to the office one day and was like “do you guys know anything about this” essentially as we’re trying to close a comically full drawer of stolen bathroom signs, and we’re like “no” and they were like “great.”

They never caught us. 

Achievement Unlocked:

The Gay Science

Perform gender perception experiments without getting caught.

u kids really liked this one huh everyone doin ok?

This weirdly reminds me of the time the people installing the new water heater at my house found hundreds of living clams and mushrooms under the floor in our basement.

I'm gonna need you to elaborate and provide images if possible because that sounds both horrifying and fucking magical.

The next major project is at last done. 5inch hoop, mostly single strand with three strand for the scales. Holo shimmer accents, felt padding for the bubbles. I like how it turned out for my first fish!

kinda in love with the author of this chicken recipe and her love of garlic. karina if you’re single call me

like this is exactly how i need to be given cooking instructions. softly reassure me that im not going to burn my house down because im cooking with garlic cloves. thank you karina i believe it’s going to be okay

there is. so much. caramelization. the amount of caramelization in this pan is just unprecedented

here is the garlic chicken recipe btw. i put it in the replies but im linking it here too cuz ive gotten some asks about it. i can’t cook for shit so trust me when i say this recipe is easy! takes 30 min and uses relatively few ingredients. join me and karina in our garlic-fueled bliss <3

im trying out another karina recipe and i literally cannot stress enough that she’s just Like That about garlic:

Night Vale had some of the BEST one off quotes that would just suckerpunch you in the chest leave you breathless

Like the one that stuck with me was this one:

"when a person dies and no one will miss them, the mourning is assigned to a random human. This is why sometimes you just feel sad."

It's been almost 11 years... It haunts me in a good way

Know what? Tell me YOUR favorite WTNV quote. I wanna know what lingers in people's minds after all this time

“Are we living a life that is safe from harm? Of course not. We never are. But that’s not the right question. The question is are we living a life that is worth the harm?”

“The past is gone, and cannot harm you anymore. And while the future is fast coming for you, it always flinches first and settles in as the gentle present.”

“Death is only the end of you assume the story is about you”

"There is a thin semantic line separating weird and beautiful, and that line is covered in jellyfish"

"Whisper a dangerous secret to someone you care about. Now they have the power to destroy you, but they won't. That's what love is."

from one of the books:

"Nothing there but a distant airplane crawling across the sky, red blinking lights, vulnerable in the vast empty, faint red beacons flashing the message HELLO. A SMALL ISLAND OF LIFE UP HERE, VERY CLOSE TO SPACE. PRAY FOR US. PRAY FOR US."

Be proud of your place in the cosmos. It is small, and yet it is.

Don’t let your parents win at Knowing Things. Demonstrate that you can make butter from something that is not butter, like Jesus did with the wine. He did that to show his dad that he was a big boy now. And so are you.

The way this lined up so many references I know feels like some bullet bending nonsense.

i feel like this one clip fully sums up this specific group of people

OP's daughter: " thank you puppy, no, i can get up on my own puppy, thank you, give me a hug." (cr: 海棠妈)

art by 麦太的手绘小屋 and 童小乐

oh my god guys its only been like 40 minutes

I think an easy way to sum up american domestic architecture is that if you are remodeling and older bathroom you have to watch for razor blades in the walls

What could possibly be more american than creating a disposable version of a product (safety razor vs straight razor), determining that the waste generated was both dangerous (sharp!) and compact (flat!), and that the best solution was to just.. put a hole to stuff them in the walls and make it the next generation’s problem

@thefallingdream i have dealt with this so many times it’s stupid

The random photos i found though don’t do justice to what it actually looks like when encountered in the wild

Those are fucking clean looking blades. I always find masses of rusty blades with hair and general detritus.

Like having a damp rotting sharps container in the wall that you can’t empty

Tags by @tardis-stowaway:

#a couple years back there were news stories about renovations to an old commercial building where they opened a wall #and it was full of HUMAN TEETH

#there used to be a dentist's office in the building and it seems the dentist was using this same disposal 'solution' with pulled teeth

#and apparently this was at least the third WALL FULL OF TEETH discovered in the state of georgia #just all sorts of creepiness being shoved into the walls in the early to mid 20th century i guess

Tagging y’all in this one actually, what the fuck?? Holy shit. @enderjester @lapin-noire I live here and I never knew any of this was going on.

@pennie-dreadful

Congrats on coming up with a much funnier version though

I learned about this curious bit of history from the PC game Bad Mojo, where you play a cockroach traversing an apartment building and at one point your progress is blocked by a big rat that will eat you whenever you try to pass so you have to navigate into the medicine cabinet and enter the razor slot to go knock a big pile of razors onto the rat and kill them. I was so perplexed the first time I played because I was like, why is there a massive pile of razors in the wall? Who does this? But yeah, it turns out it's a thing in some old buildings and not just a contrivance invented for the cockroach game