me @ myself at 6pm: okay i’m going to bed early today

me at 2am: haha pranked

Here he comes, a friend.

fuck his shit up Nancy you wild bitch

*bangs rhythmically on the table* LET. HIM. RIDE! LET. HIM. RIDE!

florida.jpg

do u ever just stick your leg in the air really high? just do it. right now. it will not disappoint

Imagine how much historical knowledge wasn’t written down because our ancestors thought: “What idiot isn’t going to know this?”

So ancient Egypt’s best friend basically was called Punt. They traded all kinds of fun stuff with them; ebony, incense, gold, silver, myrrh, leopard skins, baboons for pets… and the Egyptians wrote a lot about the land, the people living there, what their houses looked like, records of trading expeditions to there (like, robust, oceangoing ships with thousands of men); they wrote down everything imaginable about this place… except for where it actually was.

We still to this day have no geographic fix on this ancient empire’s whereabouts, because what idiot wouldn’t know, right?

dogs are so amazing, we aren’t worthy of them

A redraw from this that kinda got out of hand

Same as last time, big thanks to lettherebedoodles for the inspiration!

THE A C C E N T OMG

[Three people with Irish accents, all overlapping each other: “Are they helium balloons?” “Oh for fuck’s sake!” “I told you, the car’s not built for helium balloons!” “Ah, fuck it…” “It’s too late!” “We’re flying away!”]

HOW

You are suddenly able to see numbers above people’s heads which are counting down and you have no idea why. One person you meet reaches 0 and…

They sneeze. it then resets.

People Reveal Their Cartoon Crushes [x] @rufiozuko

The thirst is real 

The Idiots Phoenix!