What Am I Doing?

by  out of focusさんのページ

@fleximusmax1mus

Gifts from edtwt

My scars are fading. It feels like I’m not valid because they’re going away….

Felt cute might cut my thighs and starve later we may never know

I have 2 reactions when someone tries to take some of my food.

1. No! I know the EXACT AMOUNT of calories in this & you are not going to ruin that for me.

Or

2. Yes, please, have as much as you want! Less calories for me!!

The sexual tension between me and getting my tongue pierced so I can’t eat for 1/2 weeks.🍧

400% of mental illness is thinking this is probably just how hard life is for everyone and you just can’t handle it because you’re a whiny baby who isn’t trying hard enough.

being like actually fat and having an ed is so weird bc you still get light headed and you still feel like shit all the time but talking about it feels weird

one of the worst things? being a people pleaser with an ED.

mom bought me food? well I have to eat it, I don't want to hurt her feelings.

not wanting to make friends feel weird by not eating when everyone else is.

not wanting people to be worried/suspicious. the attention doesn't deserve to be on me.

not wanting to react poorly when someone gives me something (like an ice coffee with creamer) that I used to love, but I just can't enjoy anymore.

one of my biggest issues: not wanting people to be offended or mad at me for making something else for myself instead of eating what they made.

I don't want my issues with food to affect other people, but they really affect me.

Omg I struggle with this shit everyday