What a year this week has been.
It’s Monday.
It sure as hell is.
The earlier in the day Monday you reblog the funnier this gets
This a Moonmelon, scientifically knows as asidus. This fruit grows in some parts of Japan, and is known for its vibrant blue color. What you probably don’t know about this fruit is that it can switch flavors after you eat it. Everything sour will taste sweet, everything salty will taste bitter, and it gives water a strong orange-like taste. It’s also very expensive…costing about ¥16000 JPY (which is about 200 dollars).
or you know this could be photoshopped
but idk
you tell me
this is alexandrias melon (wow)
it never grows seeds but it can still produce other melons (its magic)
it is grown deep in the jungles of peru and can prevent you from aging well into the hundreds
it is known by the natives there as k’uhul ajaw cacao shi-jiiy.
its really strange how all of these pictures look exactly the same because everything on the internet is true
This is the Peppermeloni. (seriously gosh just look at that sexy mother fucker) Its scientific name is Tumblrous Pepperonus.
The only known specimen is in a pot in David Karps treasure dungeon. It is a tradition that a single slice is given to every tumblr blog that reaches 500,000 followers.
It has the remarkable property of being as healthy as watermelon but tasting like cheesy pepperoni pizza.
This planet is really just so amazing guys wow.
Patrickmelon
The taste of this melon will always surprise you.
I’m fucking done with this site
This is the evermelon.
If you cut this watermelon a certain way you will find that it has seemingly regenerated. You can do this an infinite number of times and will have a neverending supply of melon.
OH GOD I haven’t seen this post in YEARS and THAT is the fucking additon to it!?
ALRIGHT THATS IT ITS TIME TO STOP
Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Ravenmelon and I’m ebony black (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips, and a lot of people tell me I look like watermelons (AN: if u don’t know what dat is get da hell out of here!).
Nothing will ever be better than the last one
HASHBFJGJDHRJFKFKRJ
That last one took me out at the god damn kneecaps-
hey does anyone know the fastest way to clean up milk that’s covering every goddamn i nch of the kitchen floor
i know a gal……she’s on her way
thanks
via Luke’s Instagram Story - 30 July 2018
i want this on my grave
when my mom come in my room without knocking
i wish soulja boy would walk into my house and crank dat, killing me instantly