Caroline.

These are awesome

Jean-Paul Sartre from No Exit

Is this a screenshot of texts that I sent from the future?

concept: me, sharing a milkshake with the one i love on a park bench. our two dogs are at our feet. we both have jobs we enjoy and find purpose in. my dress is very pretty and soon we will go to a rooftop party where there will be fairy lights and friendship. i murdered donald trump in the summer of 2016 and was never caught. everything is good.

How God Created Animals (via boredpanda) Previously: Dad Tweets

lol rule at creating a turkey

Gene Parmesan: Uh, I’ve got some bad news. I’m… Gene Parmesan. 

Amigos - 2x03

h/t to @ollymoss via @vanaman for inspiration

when the cashier gives u back ur change and ur putting it away but u cant do it fast enough and suddenly theyre holding out ur shopping bag and u have no hands and the coins are dropping to the ground and the bag goes up in flames and the cashier is crying and ur crying and ur wallet is screaming and ur descending into hell

My 92 year old grandma. (via lipstickbabe)

All of Leslie’s compliments to Ann

@all my friends

i cannot stress this enough

if you are an eligible voter in the US this coming election and bernie sanders does not have the democratic nomination

you. have. to. vote. for. hillary.

i am not fucking messing around

i am not gonna sit here while you write in names or go on some fucking strike. hillary is not on the same level as donald trump. all of you who act like that’s a hard choice are ridiculous. you vote for hillary clinton if she gets the primary. if you don’t, you give trump the presidency. clear and simple. normally i would not advocate against writing in names, but at this point writing in names would take away from hillary’s vote if she is the nominee–EVEN IF YOU WRITE IN BERNIE SANDERS, YOU GIVE TRUMP A HIGHER CHANCE AT THE PRESIDENCY, AND YOU DON’T WANT THAT.

not even a year ago y’all were laughing about donald trump. don’t fuck this up. in no world is hillary clinton as bad as donald trump.

TO DO LIST:

POPSACKLES

“Love Is” In Small Things

me *surrounded by a pack of wolves that are about to eat me*: settle down puppies!! I only have two hands , i cant pet you all at the same time!!!!! Haha !!!! i love you all

Watch: The officer’s collection just happened to include a super rare 1-of-10 “shiny” card.

THESE ARE THE KIND OF PEOPLE WHO SHOULD BE POLICE OFFICERS

If Aphrodite had stomach rolls then so can I

This is veryveryvery important. My wife was feeling down about herself the other night and asked me “why do I look like this?” And I immediately brought up a photo I had taken of a sculpture of Aphrodite I had taken at the Chicago MOMA. I said, “look at this picture. What does she look like?” And my wife very shyly answered “Me…” (Literally her body is IDENTICAL to the sculpture) so I replied “that is the Goddess Aphrodite. THAT is why your body looks like this.”

I very rarely reblog miscellaneous posts but there are some followers of mine who really need to see this.

Oh shit I’m crying thank you

Remember, a lot more of you have the bodies of goddesses than you might think.

BOOM. Love yourself, darlings.